Should 18y/o son move out?

Idiophreak

rog2 wrote: »

I really am sorry to repeat myself, but I do feel that you have missed the point totally.

Don't worry, I have that feeling too

rog2 wrote: »

1. There is NO law in the UK that states that children living at home MUST contribute to the household income.

No, but let's not forget that a) the person in question isn't a child. And b) I thought that people living with BR were subject to controls the rest of us aren't? Surely there must be *some* law that makes it dodgy to give money away (to children or otherwise) to prevent it being passed back to your creditors?

rog2 wrote: »

2. It is NOT up to the OR to make 'judgemental' decisions - that is the prerogative of the judiciary and not the civil service.

I'm not 100% clear on the job of the OR, but it seems to me this has been more of a financial suggestion rather than any kind of moral/judgemental suggestion as a lot of people seem to suggest.

rog2 wrote: »

3. IF the OP were to decide to ask his son for a contribution, then of course that contribution should be declared, but no-one has the right to demand that he asks his son to contribute.

...but why not...

If they went out and spent £50/week on a new TV, would this be allowed?
(like I said, I really don't know...)

If not, why is spending £50/week to support your grown-up son any different?

(the other person's son is at home at 30...if this one stays there for the same amount of time, (say) £50/week, 52 weeks per year, 12 years = £31.2k...Not a small amount of money to be spending on something...Clearly, they might leave tomorrow...but should the OR ignore this just in case they do?)

Idiophreak

blind-as-a-bat wrote: »

This is realy just a case of an OR trying to squeeze an IPA out of the OP when it cant be justified as there is no figures to justify the OR,s claim because ther is no survay that truly shows the figures involved for this indavidual case

That's getting towards an answer I can cope with

NekoZombie

£75 a week??? My OR allowed me a weekly budget of £41 (£181 a month) for household expenses, so where the hell does this £75 come from? I'm really getting peeved off with inconsistencies amongst ORs, and general unfair behaviour. Making family members feel unwelcome is beyond belief, and makes me think there is such a thing as being 'too' honest with the OR. I wonder if they get commission for each IPA they set up :rolleyes:

NekoZombie

blind-as-a-bat wrote: »

I dont know about comision but as ive said my judge warned me they had targets to reach:rolleyes:

Thanks BAAB

I wasn't being literal , I think there'd be a huge uproar if it was found out ORs were paid commission for each IPA.

NekoZombie

blind-as-a-bat wrote: »

Hmmmm not sure my self if a target is set there is usualy a reward of some sorts for hitting it the question is what?

Wages!!!

NekoZombie

Seriously though, all this stuff is starting to get me down. The inconsistencies between ORs is a serious issue that we seem to be able to do nothing about.

whitehartman

This is the IPOQ that was sent to OR

INCOME

Take Home Pay- 940
Partner Contribution- 0
Child Benefit- 116 (for 2 children)
Tax Credits- 260 now gone down to- 224 (OR unaware)
Pension Income- 0
Contributions by other Adults- 60 from son (this started the OR queries)
Other Income- 0
TOTAL - 1,376

OUTGOINGS


Rent- 0 (Rent free with job)
Council Tax- 0 (as above)
Heating and Lighting- 120
Water- 0
Tel/Internet- 60
Housekeeping- 521 (as advised by CAB for family of 5)
Ess Travel (child bus fares)-40 (but now 0 as its now free)
Clothing- 70
Maintenance- 0
Fines- 0
Other Essential Payments- School meals- 60
Life Insurance- 33
Personal Hygiene-45
House Insurance- 10
Mobile Phones- 40
Sky TV- 40
Running Vehicle- 153
Contingency- 50
TOTAL- 1,242

Difference of 134.

I did not add for pets (Dog, 2 rabbits)
Also my daughter is now going to college which i need to find £330 for uniform/Equipment/Books etc

The fares i have gained but Tax credits are down so its roughly the same total.

Can anyone advise a better I/E?

Also my son was contributing £60 p/m(as shown above)(£15 per week WHEN WORKING) and paying for the odd electric top up when he had a little extra from when he was working at his temp/part time job.
So he was not getting a free ride.

Andybez38

Sorry, but i have not read all the posts. But in answer to the question should my 18 yo son move out.

My reply if he does move out tell me how you got him to do it. I want my 20 yo son to move out. Somehow i dont think he will do in the immediate future as he lives rent free with me.

whitehartman

Ask for £75 per week

margaretclare

I'm amazed at some of the comments here. While I agree that son shouldn't be penalised for parents' mistakes, when did it ever become commonly acceptable that young people who have some kind of an income, whether earnings or JSA, should live rent-free at home? It didn't use to be the case. DH talks about how his very first wage-packet as an engineering apprentice aged 17 in 1951 was handed over to his mum. She didn't know whether to laugh or cry, it was so little. According to him she solemnly gave him back a proportion of it for pocket-money. We all did similar. Living at home costs money, and what does it teach young people if they think they can have it all free, including food, unlimited hot water, phone calls, washing and ironing done. No one gets that free anywhere else, and I feel very strongly that those parents who allow youngsters this amount of latitude, while struggling themselves, are doing nobody any favours.

Margaret