Old Man's Family Refusing To Pay For His Funeral

bluelass

In a pub where I go to a quiz night usually once a week a old man who went in there (wasn't part of the qquiz team) has died. He has a wife (80 like him) and 2 sons and a daughter. Last week I got a call from someone who goes in there asking if I could give some money towards his funeral I got asked for £200. My reply was I cant really afford to and what about his family. I was told they couldn't pay to which I replied again sorry but I cant. His family obviously want other people to pay for it, I mentioned this at work earlier on and someone aid his family should go to the DSS and claim on the social fund ( this used to be called a paupers funeral). I think its quite cheeky expecting others to pay what do others think. The others in the quiz say he had quite a good job and pension so his family just want to avoid shelling out.

Marktheshark

Quite a lot of people could not afford to bury either themselves or their spouse without getting in debt.
Great Britain 2015 where you can not afford to die, let alone live.

theEnd

Used to work in a pub where people often died with seemingly no close family.

We'd always have whip round to raise some money, but ultimately the landlord would pay for the funeral.

Mojisola

bluelass wrote: »

His family obviously want other people to pay for it, I mentioned this at work earlier on and someone aid his family should go to the DSS and claim on the social fund ( this used to be called a paupers funeral).

The others in the quiz say he had quite a good job and pension so his family just want to avoid shelling out.

If he has left any money, the family won't get help from public funds for a funeral.

If the council does get involved because they refuse to deal with the body, the money will be claimed back from his estate.

RAS

if the family cannot pay, then they can ask for a public health funeral, from the hospital if he died there or the social services.

However, those providing the funeral will expect the cost to be repaid from his estate if there is any. And funeral costs have the first call on estates before even secured debt.

pollypenny

There's a big difference between having a whip round and being asked for £200!

Can't see many people parting with that much!

jackyann

I do feel for you. Honestly it sounds like you're caught up in something rather unpleasant, and not fair.
It is fairly common in pubs & clubs for whip-rounds to provide a bit of a wake, or help the family with expenses, but not £200!
Most of us would only part with that sort of money in very unusual circumstances.
I think you are quite correct, and you can put in a few quid towards the wreath or charity collection, to show willing.
Very sad about the family, but you really can't get dragged into it.

g6jns_2

bluelass wrote: »

In a pub where I go to a quiz night usually once a week a old man who went in there (wasn't part of the qquiz team) has died. He has a wife (80 like him) and 2 sons and a daughter. Last week I got a call from someone who goes in there asking if I could give some money towards his funeral I got asked for £200. My reply was I cant really afford to and what about his family. I was told they couldn't pay to which I replied again sorry but I cant. His family obviously want other people to pay for it, I mentioned this at work earlier on and someone aid his family should go to the DSS and claim on the social fund ( this used to be called a paupers funeral). I think its quite cheeky expecting others to pay what do others think. The others in the quiz say he had quite a good job and pension so his family just want to avoid shelling out.

Sounds like a try on to me. If nobody else can pay the the hospital where they died will pay or alternatively the local authority will do so.

deedee71

I was forwarded a request on Facebook recently. One of my friends has a friend in the US whose adult son had died. Despite the man having parents, siblings and a fiancee, apparently there was a need to resort to crowd-funding to pay for the funeral.

£200 seems more than just a whip round of pub regulars.

SailorSam

I wouldn't pay, perhaps send some flowers if he was a friend but i would'n't pay towards the funeral.

bluelass

I didn't know him personally and neither did the others on the quiz. He came in with another man and myself and others just used to let on to him that's all. My dearly loved gran died at 86 over 2 years ago sadly I still miss her but she didn't leave her family with costs. Why should strangers be made to pay to bury someone they never knew? I heared he had 3 grown up children shouldn't it be their concern? its funny how its always men who die and have nothing in the world but can afford booze, taxi fares and cigs but always never have anyone to bury them its dirty.