What is the point of being married?

PenguinOfDeath

*~Zephyr~* wrote: »

I have just been through a Christmas with both sets of parents and families were asking when we were going to tie the knot

This alone would put me off from ever doing it

System

PenguinOfDeath wrote: »

This alone would put me off from ever doing it

Well yes, me too. I think its pretty damned rude tbh.

Birdie85

TBH, I would rather just get married at the registry office with a couple of witnesses and know that we're then covered for things like pensions and NOK etc rather than trying to get things drawn up and realise that we've missed something when it's too late. You don't even have to tell people or change your name. Just sign the paperwork and carry on as normal.

POPPYOSCAR

*~Zephyr~* wrote: »

Well you just might have the EXACT answer I'm looking for!! What financial reason is a good enough one to get you to the registry office????

Unfortnately not.


Our circumstances are different to yours. We have children, stepchildren and IHT issues.

Tropez

My now-wife had always very firmly stated she didn't want to get married. There were many reasons for that, all of which were perfectly understandable. Then, one day, or rather one night at some silly time in the morning, she woke me up and asked me to marry her.

Our relationship hasn't changed. Everything is still the same. Prior to marriage she was named as beneficiary in the case of my death on everything that I could name her as beneficiary for.

Dynamics are the same, sex is the same, the way we treat finances are the same (regardless of how the law perceives things)... there's no difference day to day. Perhaps a few legal things that neither of us care too much about.

But I married her because she asked me to marry her. It's hard to explain without going into details I'm not particularly willing to share but the fact she asked me is an indicator she loves me more than I could ever deserve to be loved and it made her happy.

Torry_Quine

Rebel_Cause wrote: »

Yes, I have seen that many times too. I believe that if you have to work hard at a relationship, it is the wrong relationship to be in.

I totally disagree. Any relationship needs work and sometimes yes you have to work hard.

Gloomendoom

*~Zephyr~* wrote: »

That would be a shame, because there IS a need for CPs. Holland and New Zealand have them for hetero couples, so I'm hopeful that we will follow suit.

Are there any differences between a civil marriage and a civil union... apart from the name?

Mojisola

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I totally disagree. Any relationship needs work and sometimes yes you have to work hard.

But if it's hard work all the time, something isn't right.

ViolaLass

pinkshoes wrote: »

I think that marriage also makes you work harder at your relationship. Just look at the break up statistics of those who have kids within a marriage and those who have kids when not married. (The latter being shocking!)

Correlation is not causation.

Annisele

*~Zephyr~* wrote: »

I think what my Doctor friend was saying was that in the absence of any close family, they are not going to disregard OH's opinion when he's stood there at my bedside. Which makes sense because they have noone else to ask but him!

In A&E, I think that's generally true. Decisions that need to be taken in A&E can often be decisions that need to be taken RIGHT NOW - but not all medical decisions are like that.

I got married to my partner of 15 years mainly for the pension benefits. It's extremely unromantic, but my pension scheme gives spouses a much better deal than unmarried partners. Plus (for us, in our circumstances) getting married had the same effect as making wills in favour of each other - and a wedding is much more fun.