ohs mum on her own xmas day.

lika_86

merlin68 wrote: »

My mum wont have anyone else, as shes just had surgery herself. plus it would mean his mum sleeping downstairs on sofa with no toilet round mine as she cant manage stairs. Also i cant drive,so wouldn't be able to get to my mums if he went round his .

How far away does your mum live? Could you get dropped off there the day before, stay the night and then get picked up by your OH?

merlin68

Nope, there is nowhere for me and two children to stay in a tiny bungalow.plus my mum wouldnt put up with that either.

Running_On_Empty

Has anyone considered that this lady is not welcome because of her behaviour towards her children? It's a two way street and if she's anything like some of my rellies she's not welcome for a blimmin good reason.

pollypenny

I couldn't stand my MIL, but I wouldn't have let Her be alone on Christmas day.

In fact, when DS was in uni, we used to have a succession of strays over.

Jagraf

OP, how far is your family from your OH mum.

We don't leave anyone on there own either. Whole range of reasons to get away with it, but I just can't.

I hope I'm not left on my own either when im old as I'm sure I will be a PITA :Dx

moomoomama27

There is always a solution of you want it to happen.

I couldn't see a member of mine or my husbands family alone on Christmas day. My Brother promised me he was having my Mother for Christmas this year, after us having her for the last 10 Christmas days, yet as always he comes up with another pathetic excuse. So I am having her again, otherwise she would be on her own. We don;t get along too well, but for the sake of my children, and her not being lonely and sad on Christmas day, we'll set another place round the table.

bagpuss38

Oh how awful is all this.

I would much rather be on my own that go or be taken to somewhere that I am not wanted.

Perhaps op could enlighten us further as to why other siblings are reluctant to invite their mother.

I hope having 4 kids at least one of them will tolerate their old mum when they have their own homes lol.
If not sod 'em it's me a bottle of baileys and the remote:D

thorsoak

Maybe, just maybe MIL doesn't want to be passed around like a parcel to keep everybody in the family not "feeling" guilty.

I hate it when I hear people discussing who is having mother for Christmas dinner - instead of a turkey perhaps?

Two years ago, I spent Christmas day on my own - by my own choice. I'd been invited to my daughter's home, to either of my two sons' homes - but I decided that I wanted to stay home, on my own. It was the second Christmas since my OH had died - first one I'd spent with my daughter - and I wanted to just sit, on my own, and remember our life together.

Maybe this MiL would like to do the same.

purpleshoes_2

Ive spent christmas days on my own before, Ive also worked several christmas days. Its one day. Its not the worst thing in the world for someone to be on their own on christmas day particularly as they have plans for boxing day.

Some people spend every christmas day on their own, better to be with people on boxing day who want you there than to be with people on christmas day with people who don't

All this fuss and hype doesn't help, with the expectation that everyone will have somewhere to go. I used to work in homeless projects and with young people, some who went home to family for the day, others spent their day with staff.

The Christmas Days I did spend on my own werent terrible, I saw family on Christmas Eve and Boxing Day, they were fine, its like any other day or it should be, no wonder people end up under stress with the pressure that there is on people to have people around and have a good time as well.

AnnieO1234

Got to admit I am in this same situation with my MiL. Due to various reasons, none the least my DHs cancer, there has been a total breakdown of our relationship. Just this week she reported me to social services as abusing DH - this after various issues with her taking an over interest in his genitals during a long period of catheterisation. Her report was spurious and malicious. There is no way she is visiting is on Christmas Day, her other son is disappearing to his new girlfriends (former mistress) parents along with her other grandchild.
Anyway back to the thread, sorry for derailing slightly, but there are plenty of reasons to not have someone around and this woman's other children might be in a similar situation to me. IMHO you reap what you sow. I'm not talking about the widowed, or the childless etc, but if your own family turn away from you then you probably only have yourself to blame. Xxx