When do you stop giving Christmas presents?

74jax

BrassicWoman wrote: »

when they stop sending thank you letters.

I know I've posted but mine was before that. 18 is out limited regardless of thank you letters..... We'd still be sending now if that was the case.

We do still send birthday presents tho.

balletshoes

onlyroz wrote: »

Indeed. To all the people who have replied saying that they still give their adult nieces and nephews a present or money, do you get anything back from them? I know you don't give to receive but I would be unhappy about giving an adult a present who I know had no intention of ever reciprocating.

that has never occurred to me personally - I've not ever received a present back from my nephews and nieces, I don't expect to, and it has no bearing whatsoever on my decision to keep buying for my nephews even though they are adults now, and both working.

Wilma33

In my family it stops when you leave full time education / uni and get a full time job.

SeduLOUs

In our family there was an 18 rule for Christmas and birthdays.

On 18th birthdays you got a 'special' gift, either higher value than the norm (but not ridiculous, maybe double), or people would chuck together and get a nice piece of jewellery or something a bit more memorable as your 'final' gift.

The 'adults' then had a sort of secret santa box where you'd bring a gift for someone of the same gender as you and stick it in a male or female box, then everyone picked one gift out later in the evening.

My nan ignores the rules though, and still sends me a cheque every Christmas even though I am now 30!

borkid

Luckily I've never had this problem. I became estranged from my family before the decision to stop needed making. They have never given presents to my two ( both adult now) .
There seems to be a lot of emphasis on buying or giving money/vouchers. This year my son will get his first published poem set to music by me no monetary cost apart from the paper. We have also sent some champagne to celebrate all the good things that have happened this year ( he's had a bad few years) but we don't usually get anything because in his words ' I have everything I need'. We do help him out a lot if he needs it mid year though.

How about if you must give something to older nieces and nephews giving a token present. One of the nicest presents I got from my daughter was a home baked cake, I'm gluten sensitive so any cake has to be homebaked as I find the shop GF ones far too sweet. The best present my hubby gets are socks... OK I hear the groans but these are hand knitted woollen socks. Try to think of things that are unique, a photograph or a sketch you've drawn yourself maybe.

Timeflies

It probably depends how close you are to each other. My OH has only spoken to one of his uncles in the 5 years I've known him; they exchange cards only at Christmas and birthdays.

I have one uncle - we give gifts to each other every birthday and Christmas. I don't think it's strange to give each other gifts as adults. If we had a huge family, maybe we wouldn't, but I couldn't imagine seeing a relative over Christmas and not getting them a gift.

I guess you draw a line as to who you consider family. To me, if I never see them and they never call, they're distant relations, not family!

Andypandyboy

We stop at 18, but then when they have children we buy for them, so having five nieces we now have seven of their children to buy for. None of our children have children so at the moment it is quite unequal but we don't mind.

catkins

Me and OH don't have children but we still buy for our nieces and nephews - they range in age from 30 to 18. We are close as a family though and spend Christmas Day together - us, my parents, my brother, his wife and 2 children, my sister, her husband and 2 children. We get separate presents from 2 of them (they don't live at home and have pretty well paid jobs). The other 2 have their names included on presents from their parents (one lives at home and only has a part time job and the other is at Uni).


We also give birthday presents

notanewuser

notanewuser wrote: »

We don't buy for any adults, and only 2 or 3 of our 5 nieces and nephews (aged between 1 and 3). I'd be extremely surprised if we're still buying for them at 18.

I was right. Not one of DD's aunts or uncles bothered to send anything back with DH for DD, not even a card. So there's another bit of "xmas" I can ignore for future years. :beer:

minerva_windsong

azzabazza wrote: »

We gave presents until their 21st. Always send a birthday card on their birthdays and a Christmas card. If I happen to visit any of them over the festive period I will take a box of chocolates, wine or similar.

This is similar to the set-up with my mum's side of the family - the presents from aunties and uncles on that side stopped at 21, but we still get a card on birthdays and at Christmas.


On my dad's side of the family, we always did Secret Santa for the kids as there were so many cousins, but that stopped about seven years ago due to people getting older and having their own kids.