Feeling Bad For Being Ungrateful But Still What A Waste

Faith177

Takeaway_Addict wrote: »

You are being ungrateful...sell some of those other bags.

The other bags are all primark specials is get 50p tops for them so not worth it

I'm a nightmare for spilling stuff in bags and having make up break up in or sweets going sticky that's why I don't bother with expensive ones tbh

Faith177

74jax wrote: »

Is the price the issue, if the bag was 100.00 would that be ok? Our would you have preferred a weekend away for the £300.00.

Price and style is the issue

I'm accident prone me and a £300 bag will not last long trust me

Even at £100 it would have been too much

Also to add the bag is actually kind of hairy on the front so you can't even get it wet !!!!!!!

He has just basically implied he got it because it was blue

z.n

That is an incredibly generous gift- but no bag is worth postponing or adding to credit card debt. Hopefully you can return it and get some sort of refund. It does seem like he is trying really hard but missing the point slightly. Far more romantic to prove he has been listening and getting that £20 toy! Maybe he simply needs to be told.

Billie-S

Maybe I am just old fashioned, but I think £250 on a bag?! :eek:

And I am sorry but I don't even like it.

I would be mortified if my husband spent a QUARTER of that on me!

When we were a lot younger (early 20s,) he used to waste shedloads of money on me, for stuff I didn't even ask for or want. And he didn't buy the things I DID ask for. He would say 'what do you want?' (for my birthday for example,) and I would write down 15 things, (a fiver to a tenner value,) and say any 3 or 4 of them.

But he would just go get what he thought I should have. And all of the 6 or 7 things he bought featured NONE of the things I had put on my 'list.' I used to think: what is the point in him even asking me what I want?! (He also used to make a habit of buying virtually the same things (or very similar things): each time too, for Christmas, and my birthday...)

So by our 6th or 7th Christmas together, I said we should have a limit (like £30) and anything special I want (like a piece of jewellry or my favourite Chanel perfume,) I will get it myself. My husband is fab, but when it comes to this, he is a bit rubbish LOL, and I prefer to get what I want myself, and just have £25-30 of 'surprises' from him.

My friend's husband does it too though, (never buys what she wants, but splashes extravagantly on stuff she doesn't want!) and she has told him recently to just stop, and she will buy her own stuff, and he can buy his, and they will get a tenner's worth of token gifts.

I don't know why they do it. Maybe it's because they think they know what's best for you? Or there is some deep rooted thing where they don't 'do' advice or suggestions. (Even on the occasions that they ask for them!!!) I dunno! I only know that my husband, as much as I love him, does not like people suggesting things or ways, that he didn't think of first. :rotfl:

barbiedoll

I do quite like the bag, and I love the colour and, although I would want all Ted Baker references to be removed first, I would probably use it. (No, I don't want to buy it from you! :rotfl:)

But.....£250 for a small handbag!! :eek::eek:

I know that's not "expensive" for a designer bag but most people just don't spend that sort of cash on a bag which, as OP rightly says, is very similar to a Primark £10 one. Especially if they'd rather have a new laptop!

You need to have a word with your OH and stop this silly, panic-buying behaviour. That money would have taken you both to a nice hotel for the weekend. And if he's putting it on a credit card, it's even worse, he's just spending money that he doesn't have.

I'm sure he must have the receipt or at least, proof of purchase, (CC bill etc) so be nice, tell him that you don't want or need a new expensive bag and that you'd rather use the money for a more useful gift. If it's from one of the decent department stores, I'm sure that they'll let you exchange it.

barbiedoll

Faith177 wrote: »

Also to add the bag is actually kind of hairy on the front so you can't even get it wet !!!!!!!

I've just seen this. A "hairy" bag! :eek:

I've gone off it a bit!

Jagraf

When you open it, tell him its lovely but its too expensive, and that why don't you take t back and spend some money on a nice meal, or a weekend break.

My OH knows not to spend so much, but I'm with you on this, I hate so much being spent on stuff. My brother does this at christmas, buys mega expensive things and all I can think is "I could have got a couple of weeks shopping for that".

Its worse if he really hasn't got the money, be kind to both of you, and tell him.

Errata

Faith177 wrote: »

Also to add the bag is actually kind of hairy on the front so you can't even get it wet !!!!!!!

Start sneezing the second you unwrap it - a lot

fairy_lights

I don't think you're being ungrateful at all, if you were you wouldn't be on here asking for advice about how to handle the situation.
My OH has done similar things, for my birthday this year he bought me an absolutely hideous necklace, it was so cheap and tacky looking I assumed it couldn't have cost much so didn't really matter that I didn't like it, and that it was the thought that counts anyway. I diplomatically said that it was very nice and very different because it wasn't something I would have chosen for myself!
The next day I saw the receipt (he'd left it in the middle of the kitchen table so I couldn't exactly miss it) the necklace was much more expensive than I would have guessed and worst of all, he'd bought it from the local card shop so it must have been a total panic buy.
I couldn't bear to keep it once I knew how expensive it was and had to ask him to return it. We went shopping together a few weeks later and he bought me a necklace that I absolutely love, at half the price. I think if you're in a long term, committed relationship you've got to be honest with each other about bad present choices...if you don't you could end up buying each other things you hate for the rest of your lives, both being too polite to say anything :eek:

tea_lover

Why would it be non refundable if it's from a department store?