Mini meltdown and light bulb moment

misstara

:eek::eek: to the ongoing hospital saga but at least you will now get a portacath.

Yay to debt reductions :j

twiggy86

Oh AleMrsT, you poor thing. It sounds like a horrible week but I'm pleased you're getting the port. And :j:j:j to the debts hopping down a number! It really does make a difference to me and I get a boost of motivation when it happens!

AleMrsT

Thanks Tara, Twiggy and Digging, I've only just seen these replies, for some reason the notifications arent coming through to my email which is annoying, I've probably missed a load of updates from you all.

Thank you for your support, its nice that I can rant on here and have genuine support, its lovely.
I've been a bit naughty this week and called the hospital yesterday to cancel my appointment for this afternoon, I just could not face another Wednesday spending four hours in the hospital waiting room for the third week in a row. I have been to the local hospital for my blood test (i found out from a friend of my work colleague who works at the local hospital that they do a Wednesday blood test 'drop in') so I went to the local hospital, got my blood test done, then called the main hospital to let them know they'll have the bloods tomorrow, and can they call me with the results and a date for surgery. I can't believe I havent thought to check whether I can have the blood tests done at the local hospital before now, it is 10 minutes down the road, a 10 minute wait and free parking! I am going to speak to the consultant about making that my regular routine in future, no more wasted Wednesdays :j:j:j

The repair man has been to put the new hinges on the fridge today, so we no longer have to keep the bin propped in front of it to keep the door closed, or keep going down to the garage to get the milk. :T Although the fridge is empty, and the cupboards are bare, theres loads of meat in the freezer but nothing to go with it! I couldnt even give my mum and grandma a cup of tea when they called this morning because we'd ran out of milk! Grandma then gave me £15 to get some essentials, bless her, then she cooked me 'tea' as OH is at work on a late shift. We've had ham, egg and chips, so nice when cooked properly, the old fashioned way. Not very slimming world friendly though.:rotfl: Ah well. I've had a lovely day in the end, just going to catch up on ironing and washing tonight, as I have no work clothes prepared for the rest of the week.

Got my wage slip yesterday... :eek: my friend who is covering for the manager tried to 'lose' one of my absence days, and use a days holiday to cover another one so I didnt lose out on so much of my wages, but the HR lady had already submitted the absences to the accountants so the wages had already been processed. I am £241 down this month :eek::eek::eek: however my friend said she will help me work something out for August as I will need at least 2 days off to recover from my surgery, if I need to use the last two remaining holiday days thats fine, as I need the cash more than two holiday days left, we have the rest of the year planned anyway really.
Although I only have £881 wages this month, I am not TOO concerned, my hospital trip to London is paid for already, I have enough prescription until September, the car insurance is sorted and our August bank holiday break is sorted as we are heading up north to see the in laws, so should only cost us the fuel to get there (fingers crossed).

Just hoping that the car passes its MOT otherwise we're completely screwed as ALL of the savings have been depleted now with the various planned (some not so planned) spends that the money was put aside for.

I'm sure we'll be fine. The idea of setting up an ironing service is now looking very tempting, it is still niggling at the back of my mind, it is the perfect way to spend my Wednesdays off as I usually do my own anyway, and I do quite enjoy it, I just hate putting it all away afterwards, but I won't have to do that bit.
Something to think about I guess, but would I have to declare the income and pay tax etc? Hmm.

Went to see my manager and her new baby yesterday with my friend who is covering for her whilst she's on maternity, it was lovely to see her and great for the three of us to get together again away from the office. It has confirmed to me that as much as I do often think about having a family, I am not the least bit maternal or broody at the sight of a baby anymore. They cry on me, I feel awkward holding them and feel ever so slightly traumatised listening to the birth stories.
I think I'm well and truly over my blip earlier on in the year where I was considering our life and OH's lack of interest in having children.

Childfree and skint seems a far better prospect than being skint and worrying about the welfare of a small one.

AleMrsT

Payday has been and gone, and so has all of my money :rotfl:
I have £100.82 in my account, to last me the rest of the month. :eek::eek::eek: TINY BIT STRESSING.....

Breakdown of spends though:

Wages plus balance of my account = £887.13

£50 towards furniture
£550 rent
£95.31 grocery shop at aldi (will last us the entire month, all cupboards, both fridges and freezers are full to the brim!)
£71 debt payment
£20 cash withdrawal for a bus ticket top up
Balance: £100.82

I didnt need to withdraw money for the bus ticket, as my work colleague sorted her cupboard out and found four bus ticket cards, she's not sure how much credit is on any of them and thinks one of them may be a childs pass, but she has said I can use what ever is left on them, so that should mean I can keep the £20 in my purse in case we need it for milk, bread etc to save me using my bank card. If the bus cards are empty, I'll have to use it for the ticket, but at least its budgeted.

At least all of the bills are paid, OH has refueled the car etc, so we should be ok. We're off to London for three days in 2 weeks time, then up to the inlaws for the bank holiday, so hopefully won't need to spend anything, as London trip is a hospital appointment and everything is paid for.

I have no savings left, and £3 something in my Paypal account.

Going to have to literally count every penny until the end of the month.

I still owe my grandma £50 and my friend £5, which I will have to pay back next month now, unless I can give my friend hers and give me grandma some towards what I owe.

There is a spa day happening at work for a colleagues big birthday, I have said I can't afford to go as I don't have the money to book it this month, so another colleague has said she will pay mine for me and I just pay her back when I've had a full months wage (she knows about my reduced wage this month and wasnt happy about it), I'm grateful to her, but its just some other money that I owe, and it takes my total 'friends and family debt' to £100. I hate owing people money, banks I don't actually care whether they get their money in dribs and drabs like they are doing on my DMP, but owing money to actual people in my life feels so degrading. I hate it. I've come to the conclusion that if she forgets to pay mine or isnt able to, I just wont go, because I can't really afford it, as the spa day is in September.

In other news, I have heard nothing more from the hospital. I will chase them again this afternoon, (I chased on Friday, and called a different department on Monday but they referred me back to the clinic I spoke to on Friday), but I am fully expecting them to just call me next week and say 'we need you to come in tomorrow for your port', which I can't do last minute, I need to let work know, I need to let OH know so he can see if he can rejig his shifts, and more importantly, I'm not here after 18th August, as we're in London (I wanted it doing before then so that the London consultant can check it!) and after that we're up north.
I get so frustrated with them, I usually end up getting PALS involved, and then the consultant gets a grump on, but I don't care anymore.

Something exciting to look forward to, we are going on holiday!!!! I:T:T I know I said above that I can't afford a lot at the moment, but we wont have to pay too much, as we're going with my parents, my sister and her husband and the niece. It is my 30th next year, and my sister's 25th at the end of the year, and we havent been on holiday abroad all together for 10 years, so my parents are paying for the two of them, and me and my sister, and we just have to pay for the husbands (and the niece who is costing the grand sum of one whole pound) It sounds mean of them to do it that way, but its the easiest way to budget for it, as my parents have X amount to spend, and we have agreed to pay the difference.

It does mean we need to budget £700, but it means we get a 10 day all inclusive holiday for £350 each, instead if it being completely unaffordable, and it is not until next September. My sister and I are so excited!!! Not sure the husbands are as enthusiastic, but to be on holiday again as a family will be completely amazing. Need to get the furniture paid ASAP so we can start putting money aside for the holiday. Its not booked yet, but hopefully my mum will book it at the end of the month.

I asked OH the other day how much we have left to pay on the furniture, I said we have been paying £100 a month and only had around £700 to pay so we can't have much left, he said he would check, but he cant remember how much he paid the last couple of months. I've been paying him £50 a month for the last three months, assuming he was paying it off the furniture and also adding his £50 to the pot too, but I really don't think he has. I'm going to ask him for the login details so I can check for myself, otherwise I'm going to put the £50 in savings instead and he can figure out the furniture payments himself.
He's getting the car MOT'd today, so I guess if he has to use some of the money towards that then its fine, as I had to use what I had saved towards it for the hotel etc for London, but I just want to know how much we owe!!!

Off to put the ironing away (yes, the ironing I was doing last time I posted, I REALLY hate putting it all away!!!!!) and clean the house, then spend the afternoon reading on the bench in the garden, as I feel like my last few wednesdays off have been rushing around at various hospital appointments, so I'm looking forward to a day at home, on my own!

Hope you're all having a good day and enjoying the first few days of August.
Mrs T. x

twiggy86

Just following you from my thread re SW - Thought I'd see if I could still log into the SW website - it asked me a couple of questions but I'm in and can access all the recipes! Thought I'd let you know in case you'd previously used it.

And I'm pleased you've got a holiday to look forward to - you deserve it!

misstara

Hi AleMrsT - just having a wee catch up with your diary, sounds like you've got a lot going on at the moment. A holiday to look forward to next year sounds fab

AleMrsT

Thanks Twiggy, will try logging in to SW to see if mine works too!

Thanks MissT, I've given up chasing the hospital now, they never ring me back so there's no point. If they book it in for when I'm not here its tough, they'll have to reschedule, making more work for them but it's not my problem.

I showed my friends round a house last night, makes me realise I really do need to get a better job. They both drive BMW's, and are looking at buying a 4 bed detached house for 280k, (fairly decent house prices where we are), and they go on holiday about twice a year. I'm still earning the same salary I was 10 years ago, and hubby is on less than he was 10 years ago (but he's far happier since his career change).
I'm now thinking I should have gone to uni after all! All my friends have decent jobs, and I'm just sat here with no pension, no noteable achievements on my CV and absolutely no hope of getting a promotion or ever buying a house. Ugh.
Plus it's my third Saturday in a row where I'm working, with a fourth one next week. As is the famous phrase, I'm too old for this sh*t.

MOT cost £184, with no service. This is because the company who fitted the tyres lost the locking wheel nut so we had to have it replaced, and some work was needed to get it passed.
Some unexpected news though, my mums aunt has given us £100 towards the cost of London. She says she buys my niece stuff all the time and I always miss out, so she's giving us something to help us out. 'We're too old to need money now'. Bless her.
Anyway, off to work now, and I have a niggly headache, just hope it's not another migraine coming on.

AleMrsT

OMG!!!!! :mad::mad::mad::mad: I just wrote a HUGE update and then something happened and it all disappeared. I can't even face writing it all out again.

Brief synopsis:

- I got a date for my port surgery - 16th September. May only need one day off as sickness absence.

- OH bought a 'dine in for 2 for £10' from Tesco, and it was a bit rubbish and only 370 calories for the main course, but 430 calories for the dessert, which is a bit disgraceful. Plus we got about 5 pieces of beef, a few bits of potato and loads of sauce, then the side dish was peas and green beans with butter and mint sauce. We used to buy these a lot previously. I'm so glad I cook from scratch and shop as frugally as possible now.

-OH can't wrap birthday presents and wastes a lot of wrapping paper. :rotfl:

- my friends didnt buy the house. But taking them round the house made me realise I want a career change and want to take on some further education, possibly an english degree with a view to starting a career as a proof reader and copy editor, but there are no jobs available and the english degree costs £16000.

- now not sure what to study, but interested in 5 key areas:
property and architecture (I already work in property!!......)
travel (pipe dream! Only rich people get to travel and call it a career)
books and literature (already established jobs in publishing are not readily available and tend to be London/Oxford based)
drama and performing arts (I got good grades for these subjects, but I am no Meryl Streep or Elaine Paige. Working in a theatre either front of house or backstage has always appealed though)
medicine and genetics. (my interest in this is biased, I would be learning purely to enhance my understanding of my OWN condition, and haematology/biology, would not want to work in this field)

So that's the last 30 minutes worth of update I just typed, in a very small nut shell.

Any suggestions on career changes welcome! Off to bed to sulk about the loss of my well structured, humorous and cathartic post. :mad:

Magpie100

You are doing really well!

Sorry to jump in, but I wanted to comment on proof reading/copy-editing. I work for a big publisher, and part of my job is commissioning copy-editors and freelancers. I also freelance myself.

My advice would be don't spend all that money on an English degree just to go in to publishing. If you really want to copy-edit and proof read, you need in-house experience, which unfortunately is now very hard to get. Most publishing companies no longer have any in-house editors - they have all been made redundant and made in to freelancers. And sadly that means the market is now very very crowded with good, experienced people that used to work in-house. Well, not sadly for me, but sadly for anyone trying to get in!

I would never tell someone not to do something, but do think about it carefully.

A cheaper way of doing things, and a way of seeing if it is the career for you would be to Google the publishing training centre and look at some of their courses, which are very good. Do NOT do any sort of course that advertises on the back of a magazine!

You are right that a lot of publishing is based in London and Oxford (but don't forget Bristol and Cambridge, too).

One area you could look at is scientific, medical and technical editing and proof reading, which is a much less crowded market. Also think about smaller businesses that aren't traditional publishers - lots of small/medium businesses will occasionally need something editing and you could build up a portfolio that way.

If you want more info on publishing careers feel free to PM me, and good luck!

Mags100

AleMrsT

Hi Mags100,

Thank you so much for your insight and advice. I will have a look at the publishing training centre and see what they offer.

I'm just a bit stuck in a rut at the moment, at college I studied English, media and performing arts, and during a careers day I remember my friend saying to me 'what would you do at uni?' and I just said 'no idea, but I'd go to Manchester uni and probably write a play'. :rotfl:
During A level study I met my ex boyfriend at the evening job I had, he was at a local college training to be a car mechanic, so I never bothered applying for uni (since all I knew was that I wanted to go to Manchester and it meant going without him!), instead I just took the first full time job I got offered (which meant quitting my studies), and we eventually bought a house, then separated four years later.

(The loan I have now is the loan I took out to pay my share of the negative equity and solicitor fees from the selling the house when we split up!)

I've never regretted not going to uni until I've sat down and thought about it over the last few weeks, I just know I'd have gone to Manchester, and I'd have more than likely chosen performing arts or creating writing, or a hybrid of the two, as I always wanted to write a play, then star in it :rotfl::rotfl: Its a good job I didn't go down that route, I don't think I have the right frame of mind to write a full play, and am certainly not talented enough to ever perform professionally! I just used to write poetry then bellow it out across the stage. :rotfl: To be 17 again!!

When I was 14 I was convinced that my 'dream job' was working as a Bluecoat at Pontins. Three years later, I was at an age where I was being asked if I wanted to make that dream a reality. Thank goodness I didn't! I've never really understood why you have to make such life changing decisions before even becoming an adult. How do you possibly know, at 17 years old, what you want to do for the rest of your life? It has such huge implications.
I only just feel ready to make that kind of decision NOW, at age 29. I feel like I've had time to live a little. I've fallen in and out of love, bought a house, sold a house, been through life changing events, fallen in love again, and am now in the right frame of mind to sit down and seriously think about what I want to be doing as a career, for the rest of my life. Its taken me 12 whole years!!
Am I too old to consult a careers advisor?!