How do you cope with the guilt of being in debt?

dreamer999

IMO think it would be best to ignore eatmyfish's comments. He/she is obviously getting some kind of kick out of us replying to his pathetic comments. Can we report this to MSE?

CAFCGirl

Well in an attempt to bring a very good post title back to the ACTUAL POINT!!!

I'll confess to now, not feeling very much "guilt" about my debt. It may be because I have no dependants, like children, or a partner whom is having to live a slightly different life to what they may have imagined because of debt. So the only person who it really affects is me.... hope thats not offensive to anyone!

In all honesty I think my anger toward myself (not massive anger!) its more like "you total numpty", I use that to drive myself further forward, like SS said....

Yes I spent it, and I enjoyed spending it, but now its time to pay it back and I personally dont think I'm trying to avoid taking responsibility for any of it!

In_Search_Of_Me

yes free speech is fine...here's what sprung to mind when I read your sanctimounoius posts;
kiss my a@@! Have a nice day!:p

eatmyfish wrote: »

What's up, don't you believe in free speech?

Maybe the truth hurts too much dear...

eatmyfish

CAFCGirl wrote: »

Well in an attempt to bring a very good post title back to the ACTUAL POINT!!!

I'll confess to now, not feeling very much "guilt" about my debt. It may be because I have no dependants, like children, or a partner whom is having to live a slightly different life to what they may have imagined because of debt. So the only person who it really affects is me.... hope thats not offensive to anyone!

In all honesty I think my anger toward myself (not massive anger!) its more like "you total numpty", I use that to drive myself further forward, like SS said....

Yes I spent it, and I enjoyed spending it, but now its time to pay it back and I personally dont think I'm trying to avoid taking responsibility for any of it!

I wish you the best, you are right not too feel guilty, it's only money after all, well done for choosing the right path :-)

In_Search_Of_Me

In response to the question in hand! I firstly felt deeply ashamed of being in debt, party because of people like eat my fish which illustrate how some people perceive those of us in debt! My debt came from depression & stupidity and I cope by realsing how far I have come as a person and how much I've changed for the better in every area of my life.
I finally took my head out of the sand and starting dealing with the debt. Initially I just told family & close friends but then realised when talking to people about the site that the vast majority of people I come into contact with are in debt! Now I hold my head up high & am a bit of a martin lewis evangelist!! Thankfully most people are supportive & non judgemental and I have been really touched by how encouraging people have been to me both on here & in real life!
Its been a real journey - very up & down but well worth the ride!! I actually pity people like eatmyfish because they dont get that at all - ok they may not be in debt but neither do they have a group of people who support, encourage and chivvy them along and they dont get the achievements (ie selling another item on ebaythis am - very exciting all for the sum of £4.20!!)I actually DONT envy people with that attitude. Would rather be where I am right now ta very much!

Tr@cker

Ive known plenty of businessmen who've never felt the least bit of guilt about bing in debt in fact they've deliberately abused the system and laughed about it.
The banks/CC companies wouldn't be laughing if none of us had any debt in fact they wouldn't exist.
So dont feel guilty about it :rotfl:

In_Search_Of_Me

Yes debt is a way of life for many but I was ashamed of my own stupidity and nothing wrong in that!
No I am not jealous at all of you eat my fish! About as jealous of you as I am the man who cruises past me in his porche every morning...a word springs to mind every time I see him but its not printable!! While I am in debt & paying it off very slowly (will be in debt for the next 7 years probably) I honestly wouldnt change this journey for the world, as I said in my previous post. I have more joy, happiness & contentment in my life as a DFW that I did when I was spending & I have more fun - just cheaper fun!!
My username is a family nickname and while it may seem stupid to you it actually means alot to me because it was a name given to me by people who love me (although I dont actually LOOK like a fish lol!!) and if you want to see that as stupid then thats up to you!

Baron_Greenback_2

Have another 5 minutes thinking about your debt to motivate you then accept you are in debt, forget about the guilt and feel some pride in the fact that you are dealing with your debt. Everyone makes mistakes, it's what you do once you have made a mistake that counts and there is plenty of support on this site to help you through with whatever is the best solution for you.

eatmyfish

fishface-69 wrote: »

Yes debt is a way of life for many but I was ashamed of my own stupidity and nothing wrong in that!
No I am not jealous at all of you eat my fish! About as jealous of you as I am the man who cruises past me in his porche every morning...a word springs to mind every time I see him but its not printable!! While I am in debt & paying it off very slowly (will be in debt for the next 7 years probably) I honestly wouldnt change this journey for the world, as I said in my previous post. I have more joy, happiness & contentment in my life as a DFW that I did when I was spending & I have more fun - just cheaper fun!!
My username is a family nickname and while it may seem stupid to you it actually means alot to me because it was a name given to me by people who love me (although I dont actually LOOK like a fish lol!!) and if you want to see that as stupid then thats up to you!

I agree with you about the porsche driver, those things handle terribly!You didn't see the irony of me eatmyfish telling you your name was stupid?Take care, and don't be ashamed of debt, that's the path of fools!

SarahNeedle1872

Baron_Greenback wrote: »

Have another 5 minutes thinking about your debt to motivate you then accept you are in debt, forget about the guilt and feel some pride in the fact that you are dealing with your debt. Everyone makes mistakes, it's what you do once you have made a mistake that counts and there is plenty of support on this site to help you through with whatever is the best solution for you.

I think this sums it up just about perfectly (is that correct English?)

I must say I don't have guilt about my debts, even tho I do have a dependant (well 3 actually if u count OH and the dog!). I also enjoyed spending the money, some of it being neccessary (deposit for getting house etc) and some not so (paying OH's debts and the dreaded shopping bug!), but I am also REALLY enjoying paying it back!:D
If it hadn't have been for MIL/SIL, I may not have heard of Martin:A , found this site or had my LBM, and goodness knows how much debt I would have now!:eek:
Nobody should be judged on their debts or how they are dealing with it, as each persons situation is individual to them..... for some people bankruptcy is the only way to go to free themselves.

Eatmyfish - No doubt there are many of us here who are envious of your debt free position (I personally can't WAIT to be debt free), but I suspect u would be hard pushed to find someone who has not found some 'benefit' (I use the term loosely as I can't find the word I'm looking for!) from their experience - be it learning how to budget/organise their money, realising their own emotional strength and determination, or just good old fashioned friendship/support from these forums.
Whilst I can't wait to be debt free, if I had my time I'd do this journey all over again!

Sarah x