Who should pay for kids to go to Uni? Kids or parents?

SandC

The thread has just reminded me of some friends I had back in the 90s. There were 3 girls, around 2 years between each.

The eldest went to uni but had her folks pay for a flat for her as she wouldn't go in halls.

The other 2 sisters couldn't go to uni at all because the parents had no money left to support them.

This was back in the days of means tested grants and no loans. And the days when it was quite normal for children not to be treated equally. It wasn't a very high household income which cut off the eligibility for grants.

I remember thinking how unfair it was at the time but no doubt they all turned out okay and fairly equal in the end.

System

Don't forget, if you do it for one child you have to do it for subsequent children or risk being blamed for treating your children differently.

lulu_92

Kids - going to Uni is about learning to look after yourself

Judi wrote: »

Don't forget, if you do it for one child you have to do it for subsequent children or risk being blamed for treating your children differently.

That's what I mean, for example if my parents had supported 3 out of 4 kids through uni and my youngest step-brother chose not to go to uni, he would be saying "but you paid for their university, where's my share?"

SandC

I also have seen how much easier the whole process can be made by those with parental support. This was excessive but my former boss's youngest went to uni and due to her parents being very wealthy didn't have to worry about fees or her accommodation (she did work for the family business during holidays). But on top of that, he had me buying all her books for her (Amazon, from her list - seriously couldn't she do this herself?), and also booking her car in for services and MOTs etc.

She literally had *nothing* to concern herself about but her studies.

Yet there are others working 2/3 jobs and finding themselves self sufficient or go under - all whilst studying for a degree.

Indie_Kid

Judi wrote: »

Don't forget, if you do it for one child you have to do it for subsequent children or risk being blamed for treating your children differently.

My parents were lucky then - my sister and I both went at the same time. We did get some money if we needed it; but unlike some, it was never a monthly allowance type thing.

System

lulu_92 wrote: »

That's what I mean, for example if my parents had supported 3 out of 4 kids through uni and my youngest step-brother chose not to go to uni, he would be saying "but you paid for their university, where's my share?"

Then you say, "You had the same opportunity as your brothers/sisters but you chose not to go"

Person_one

Buttonmoons wrote: »

I just started studying nursing at uni this year (had studied for 2 years previously at college) and my tutor group (and the majority of the others) are all 17/18 year olds. We get a nursing bursary, which we do not need to pay back - essentially you can go to uni and leave debt free - but I'm not in the student halls like most of them, and I have a child which means I get a bit more but there monthly bursary is around £550 and halls are around £120 PW - doesn;t leave them much left to live off + get bus passes etc.

As we get nursing bursary we are not allowed to apply for any loans, hardship grants, discretionary funds AT ALL - If I could, I personally would of taken a small loan to cover the excess in my childcare fees throughout the year as the max you can claim is £23 a week.....(If anyone can find childcare for that for 5 days they must be magic! ) hah!

Are you sure you can't apply for a loan? I know things have changed a bit, but when I was studying student nurses could get a non means tested loan of about £2600 per year.

lulu_92

Kids - going to Uni is about learning to look after yourself

Judi wrote: »

Then you say, "You had the same opportunity as your brothers/sisters but you chose not to go"

Again, very true, but I suppose you could argue they all had the choice. Not that my step-brother would ever argue that.

I remember once my sister's laptop broke. She brought it up in passing and my dad bought her a new one, no questions asked. A couple of years later mine broke. I did the same and I was told to buy it myself. I know that's only a minor thing but it still irks me a bit

System

lulu_92 wrote: »

I remember once my sister's laptop broke. She brought it up in passing and my dad bought her a new one, no questions asked. A couple of years later mine broke. I did the same and I was told to buy it myself. I know that's only a minor thing but it still irks me a bit

That's what I mean, you do it for one, you have to do it for the others.

Spendless

lulu_92 wrote: »

Again, very true, but I suppose you could argue they all had the choice. Not that my step-brother would ever argue that.

I remember once my sister's laptop broke. She brought it up in passing and my dad bought her a new one, no questions asked. A couple of years later mine broke. I did the same and I was told to buy it myself. I know that's only a minor thing but it still irks me a bit

That's a like for like comparison though, you both broke a laptop and only one of you had it replaced. I agree that if you support one through Uni (or alternative education) then you need to support them all, but I wouldn't be giving one of mine something just because the other had gone to Uni. If they'd wanted to go they would have had the same. I read your below quote as your step brother wanting the cash equivalent for something else, maybe that's not what you meant though.

lulu_92 wrote: »

That's what I mean, for example if my parents had supported 3 out of 4 kids through uni and my youngest step-brother chose not to go to uni, he would be saying "but you paid for their university, where's my share?"