Life begins again at 45

Bubblesmum

Morning dear diary and friends

Well yesterdays early start caught up with me. By mid afternoon I had a stinking headache and that underlying queasy feeling.

I had achieved:

bedroom tidy, some of the washing and the big kitchen tidy :T

Done a financial update - however todays text from the bank has shown me I had forgotten some payments :mad::mad:

40 Acts but no quiet time

Menu plan and grocery challenge! - OH impressed and we have worked out a more economical way of feeding visitors at weekend, without being tied to the kitchen.

Props - did quite a lot of work on this, already for last night.

We were asked over the road for tea and cake (the one I made it was yum, ) well vino and cake but had a good excuse as I was going out). They have an open house policy, saw other neighbours. One makes me so sad his two young girls come in first (13 & 11) Mum is still at work in the city. Dad is at another neighbours "getting wood" he rolls in a good half hour later (just after 6) and its obvious he's been drinking and is half cut already. Its a constant pattern at the moment. I feel for the kids who take refuge with the 21/2 year old and my neighbours who we were with. Mum seems to be ignoring the situation. :(:(

Quick freezer supper not quite as I planned, OH agreed to take me to AmDrams as head was still yuk, it was mind over matter. Got out the car, to find the centre manager unlocking and saying oh have you not got the message, rehearsal has been cancelled - it was a mixture of :mad: and :T. As fortunately OH has to turn car round and come back past me, I flagged him down, came straight home to bed - read a bit of MSE but not for long then lights out before 9pm!

Bubblesmum

What am I up to today...

Well currently sitting here feeling quite woozy, and a toothache... which usually means some sort of virus :eek::eek:

OH is making porridge and green tea to fortify me, frankly I would like to crawl back to bed

I have though confirmed Mr BMD for this afternoon.

I wanted to go rummaging in the charity shops for props in the village, but that really is not going to happen

I have looked at my index cards and will try to do the following:

1. Email friend re LD and housing
2. Sort out the financial hiccup :eek::o
3. Email contact re braille book and stick
4. 40 Acts and quiet time

porridge has arrived ......

please-let-me-be-lucky

Hope you feel better soon.

Worrying about Dad-neighbour .

Sorry you missed the concert the other night Xx

beanielou

Keep plodding

Bubblesmum

Hello dear diary and friends

Well so far today has been :mad: and then :mad:and now so i need to finish with this really :rotfl: but not sure how - arh but yes "Grandcats Extended sleep over"

I will be back.....

Bubblesmum

Hello dear diary and friends.

Trying to regain my composure and focus but finding it difficult.

Yesterday was a bit of a write-off I really think I picked up a virus, apart from walking the dog I read most of the day.

I did ring my grumpy 87 year old uncle (Who has no children and is a widower) on his birthday and we had a fairly jolly conversation considering He had decided to eat christmas pudding and custard for his tea. Which meant I then fancied it, so went and rummaged in the freezer where I knew we had put the leftovers from Christmas day. In doing so I managed to smash the macaroni cheese. ( frozen in a Pyrex dish).

Woke up this morning feeling so much brighter decided that I would go for a swim first time this year. I managed good half-hour in the water both swimming and walking up and down to strengthen my legs. I use the disabled changing room I wasn't very happy about the cleanliness as usual. Today I decide to do something about it. I took some photos and as I was leaving I spoke to the duty manager, explaining my concerns ( more to do with the nooks and crannies, especially as other users having colostomy bags, and also the red emergency call string being wrapped around the drop-down support bar. I felt I had accomplished something always niggles me, in a positive and friendly manner face-to-face.

Debated whether to go home, decided to go for a quick coffee, so that I could go onto church. Today's #40Acts of generosity was to say thank you to some person who you see often doing the daily grind, so I picked up some biscuits, and headed for the church office.

Decided to try and park in a blue badge space in the church car park, which is outside the parish office. It was occupied, so I went back out to the church square and managed to park there. I'm still at this point positive and happy, I had achieved going swimming and I was about to do something nice.

Well I walked through the church and got accosted, by the lady assistant priest, BM will you go into the toddler group and tell them why you can't park in the car park I tell them time and time again that they shouldn't be parking in the disabled space. The Parish Centre and office is attached to the old church, as I had to walk through the toddler group, to get to the parish office, and actually I was secretly frustrated that I can never park in blue badge space for this service when it's term time. I did as I was asked.

I thought I asked nicely, whether anyone was parked in the disabled space and explained that I was a blue badge holder and that I couldn't park, in the appropriate space, often this means I would have no choice but to go home and therefore could they avoid doing so etc. I carried on walking through to the parish office. To then suddenly find myself in a situation that the person who had parked in the blue bade space was in tears " I am only dropping off says the granny It was only going to be for a few minutes, I know what it's like to have a blue badge I don't do it do it normally. ". well I had tried to park more than 10 minutes earlier... followed by the toddler group official who said "we are vigilant and we don't let it happen " - unfortunately everytime I have occasionally challenged who has parked in this space in the past it has always been a member of the toddler group! I found myself in a stressful situation and I was about to take communion. finding myself comforting the granny! ( Who I add was youngish fit and agile person) I returned to the church, to find the home communion group also attending the service, and their input was not helpful.

The poor vicar who, came in on the end of this and who I like and regard highly has now had a very long email from me! OH has said I have put my concerns well. Avoided the poor me, rather than how do we educate and support those who have disabilities. I could of course walkaway, but I would like to go to my nearest Parish Church of my denomination, and treated with a degree of compassion and understanding.

The trouble is I know, that I really struggle to regulate my emotions especially when I get into a stressful situation, I'm also angry that I was angry when I went to take communion, shaking others hands during the peace was not easy! And the air was blue during pryers talking to him up there.

OH is at work today 50 miles away, so I come home to silence, and four walls. I feel terribly isolated.

However I just haven't got the energy to go out, both emotionally and physically to distract me from how I'm feeling at the moment.

I think another cup of tea is calling me...... And perhaps a soft boiled egg and home-made bread

beanielou

Big big huggles dear Bm.
it is so hard ~~but all we can do is our very best.
Plodding is good

Sun_Addict

Oh BM I live next door to a church which hosts various groups - it's always the parents picking up their kids who park right across our drive, so ignorant. Sorry you missed your concert you must have been so disappointed. I really hope you are feeling more positive soon xx

Bubblesmum

Evening dear diary and friends

Thank you for your lovely comments.

Last night is best forgotten and I started the night on the sofa with Mr Big Cat :rotfl: all 6 kilos of him, calming my stress on my chest

Today a slow day... started with me in bed, avoiding dealing with squirty Gertie the kitten who has ate something :eek: bless her.... out of sorts today.

Watched Brooklyn this afternoon, about an Irish girl going to New York in the 1950's a really mellow film to chill with my knitting.

Vicar rung me to me if I was ok - he's lovely

Daddy has emailed twice, first one - wasn't well timed last night. Poor me email from his hotel in Malta, ( very big, noisy medical students no kettle) well if you do get a bargain on Tr@v3lzoo !!!!.Second email informs that they have moved from a Salvation Army room to the Ritz! and bought a kettle. Its windy but warm. I replied well.... we have northern winds here ;)and a squirty kitten :rotfl::rotfl:

Aunty Flo has still not arrived ( 2 days overdue), and my body doesn't know what to do...

Out tonight at Am Drams, if it is cancelled tonight I am heading to the pub!

Bubblesmum

Morning dear diary and friends

I'm in trouble with the OH.

After 24 hour fasting - Gertie the squirty kitten - was back on form, and so it was jointly agreed to make sure kitchen door is shut so she can't scavenge......

OH has just made bacon sandwiches and found the water spray, to remove said kitten from Kitchen.... as she was keeping her Daddy company.

All good.... until I catch my OH staring "whats wrong I ask?" " The other kitchen door is open" :eek: Heart sinks....

On investigation sure enough - cat has got the cream - well bacon rind scraps, licking chops etc :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

OH is :mad: he is chief pooh clearer upper ( my stomach cant cope) and we have visitors this weekend...

In many many ways, of the Aunty Flo, fatigue, is this a virus going to my chest question... I would like to retire to bed!

Water bowls are filled to the brim

PS it wasn't him who left the other door open :o