Things you should not do...

alice-mary

One that my Mum did... don't mistake the tvp mince for porridge oats when making your breakfast:eek:! She was moaning about the stuff being "in date" but tasting f*&"ing awful! I nearly wet myself when I realized what she had done :rotfl:

Alice
x

melanzana

Do NOT pull out the top rack of the dishwasher to empty it, when you KNOW it needs repair to stop it coming right out...

Yep, the rack came out alright, straight onto my newly tiled floor. I'm still finding shards from the glasses twelve months later!

Loving the thread.

rosalie-lavender

I have been chuckling at these and now have one to add.

If you really must make chocolate cake with a group of 15 children of mixed ages. (if anyone else gets the urge I suggest you go and lie down instead!) pay careful attention to the numbers on the jug and don't mix up 1/4 of a pint with 1/4 of a litre.

All was going well until we came to mix it up when one of the girls said "it is a bit runny." It is a runny mix but it seemed runnier than normal and when I noticed it was a bit oily the penny dropped. Whilst looking from across the table to help one little boy add the oil I had told him to pour it in to the wrong 1/4 mark-almost doubling the oil needed.

Cue one impromptu maths/problem solving lesson about what to do if you accidentally double one of the ingredients. Luckily I had taken extra ingredients and so we had to double everything else and make four cakes instead of two. The oven was on for two hours because I only had two tins with me so we had to cook two and then wash the tins up before we could cook the other two.

I now also know that the school ovens have hot spots because two cakes side by side took totally different amounts of time to cook. A difference of about 10 minutes.

The nine children I actually cooked with and the rest of the group enjoyed the finished results though.

Next time I think I will stick to something easier like cookies. On the other hand I might well burn them!

bambos

Don't think you and your mate can lift the engine out of a golf

Don't think it's a good idea to lift the box of books into the loft, get half way up the ladder and realise it's too heavy

Don't try rushing into your 22 month old when he's crying out in the night......cue running into the doorframe and sporting a shiner for weeks

Don't mix up the laxatives and ibuprofen

Last but not least don't go into the bank and rant about a mixed up direct debit then realise after speaking to the branch manager that your actually in the wrong bank

PenguinOfDeath

Remembered another one -

When in a hotel don't mistake the coffee sachet for a sugar sachet to put in you tea

Caterina

Don't store heavy pan lids on high shelves! Trying to get the pan down, the lid slid off and sliced a piece of my scalp, luckily missing most of my skull! A lot of blood and mild concussion but no big damage done. Could have been a lot worse if it had got me straight in the middle of my head. A truly lucky escape!

snowleopard61

bambos wrote: »

Last but not least don't go into the bank and rant about a mixed up direct debit then realise after speaking to the branch manager that your actually in the wrong bank

... or place an order for a Chinese takeaway (yes, I know, not very OS but we all need a treat once in a while! ), tell them you're just popping into the newsagent nearby, go back in, sit down and wait, and then discover from the bemused expression on the young lady behind the counter that the original takeaway was the one next door. Oh dear.

bambos

snowleopard61 wrote: »

... or place an order for a Chinese takeaway (yes, I know, not very OS but we all need a treat once in a while! ), tell them you're just popping into the newsagent nearby, go back in, sit down and wait, and then discover from the bemused expression on the young lady behind the counter that the original takeaway was the one next door. Oh dear.

:rotfl: ha ha

amibovvered

bambos wrote: »

Last but not least don't go into the bank and rant about a mixed up direct debit then realise after speaking to the branch manager that your actually in the wrong bank

Years ago, in the days when we still rented TVs and not many people had home phones, I was in a phone box with my dad when he rang to complain the telly was faulty. They couldn't seem to find our details and we were freezing in the phone box and eventually my usually even-tempered dad shouted that was the last time he rented with Visionhire. There was a pause then the chap he was speaking to said 'This is Telefusion . . . .'

Waffle_On

Don't immediately follow chopping chillies with a shower.