Things you should not do...

Primrose

Many years when I was very young and had my first car I had to visit a strange place. Having had to park some distance away I completely failed to make a note of the street where I had parked. On leaving the building several hours later in the dark I was completely disoriented and could find no landmarks I could remember or recognise and walked around for half an hour searching for the car in vain and ending up in tears of panic.

No mobile phones in those days! I ended up having to find a phone box and ringing the police. Eventually a police car turned up at the phone box and they drove me around the local roads until we found the car. I could have hugged them. I felt so foolish. I doubt one would get the same service today.

beedeedee

I swear my car moves around the car park on it's own while I'm in the supermarket...........it's never where I'm sure I left it....!

room512

Don't go in to hospital for an operation and think that the paper knickers are a hair net...(in all fairness I realised in time but the nurse said lots of people put them on their heads!!!)

Kantankrus_Mare

room512 wrote: »

Don't go in to hospital for an operation and think that the paper knickers are a hair net...(in all fairness I realised in time but the nurse said lots of people put them on their heads!!!)

Thanks.......that really brightened up my monday morning. :rotfl:

cat4772

there are so many kitchen don'ts that are linked to cats. or one cat in particular!

Don't lift frozen gammon out of the freezer and leave said gammon on top of the upright freezer overnight. Don't then lock the cat in the kitchen. Don't call the police the next morning to report a gammon thief when the gammon is no longer on top of the freezer (actually they took it quite seriously). About two weeks later we had to call the exterminators (think rentokill) to come and sort out a fly problem around the kitchen / pantry. that flipping cat had dragged the gammon it couldn't be bothered eating into the pantry and the gammon fell into the disused coal shoot.

Don't be so busy thanking neighbour after his recent fishing trip, for dropping off a freshly caught haddock (wrapped in waxed paper) that you fail to notice the blooming cat trying to make off with it. The parcel was bigger than the cat!

Don't freak out at the sight of the uncooked Christmas turkey moving across the kitchen work-surface (with some unseen help from THAT cat) that you drop the jar of melted goose fat over the kitchen floor, the scream disturbed the cat who jumps down to the floor, taking the turkey with him and both crash into the cupboard. In the days before internet, finding a vet open on Christmas morning was not fun (or cheap:eek:)

Don't think that cats will not like evaporated milk - they do. And rice pudding and custard. however he did not like apples and the amount of vomit that cat produced to get rid of the apple was truly shocking.

don't rush out to work one morning and let the cat scurry past you (into the house) with a bit of cotton dangling from its mouth. when you get home 6 hours later, don't freak out at the amount of blood in the kitchen and living room (and a cat grinning all Cheshire-y and proud)! Don't turn the kitchen and living room upside down looking for a dead mouse and when you find nothing, DO NOT assume the cat has eaten the remains. Do not, at the end of a long day, fall into bed, let your feet touch something cold, wet and furry, fall out of bed, hit your head on the bedside cabinet or give yourself a concussion.

Don't be so relieved that your cat has come home after gallivanting for three weeks to fail to realise that it isn't your cat that has come into the house as you leave for work. Don't get home and consider calling the Vatican to report a MIRACLE that your neutered boy cat has given birth to seven kittens!

Don't install a cat flap so your cat can leave presents for you on a daily basis. Eggs from nests, decapitated mice, tail-less mice, birds and unidentifiable remains were all left for me. I learnt VERY quickly to wear slippers in the house at all times. Also learn to leave traps to catch the 'live' gifts he'd bring home for me.

Perhaps I should have simply abided by the rule "don't get a cat"

Cat.x

juliettet

Don't read Cat4772's posts whilst drinking coffee and wearing a new pale lemon top!

OurLass

juliettet wrote: »

Don't read Cat4772's posts whilst drinking coffee and wearing a new pale lemon top!

Nor a white one whilst drinking tea!!
:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

littlegreenparrot

If you find a stunned barn owl on the road driving home from work in the early hours, don't leave it in a box in the kitchen with a sign saying " Don't open, owl" and expect your 4 children not to open it the second they get up! Or be surprised when they come and wake you up to tell you about it.

(My dad, coming home from shift work when we were kids. Don't worry, the owl was fine and he knew what he was doing. With the owl anyway!)

Dozey_crow

room512 wrote: »

Don't go in to hospital for an operation and think that the paper knickers are a hair net...(in all fairness I realised in time but the nurse said lots of people put them on their heads!!!)

I thought they were some type of disposable flannel and was busy washing with it/them whilst waiting for my 'pants' from the nurse. She laughed!

If you are a 21 year old boy driving a car that is filthy outside and full of old/ new pop bottles food wrappers animal feed and bedding and food in various states of decomposition on the inside be careful exactly which day you decide to change your ways. For instance don't decide that a boring day off work before Christmas will be perfect... Fill up both the wheelie bin and recycling bin with all the crap from the car.. Then decide to wash the car by flinging a bucket of water over it. Two issues 1) parents are furious.. No bin collection for 2 weeks over Christmas and the bins were practically empty for the collection yesterday. 2) it had been below freezing for weeks.. No sun the water froze instantly meaning you can't get in the car at all.. Parents are furious as they have to drive you around for a week. :rotfl:

My brother!

CRANKY40

I'm still giggling at the "possessed" turkey :rotfl::rotfl: