Acceptable or not?

dandelionclock30

Hes got severe anger issues and thats being verbally abusive. Its a small step towards beating you up, its on the same continuum.
He can get help for anger issues via the G.P. Personally I'd be leaving him because I wouldnt want to end up being hit.

his_missus

Has this name calling only been during the last few months or throughout the relationship? If it's a recent event, has something happened which has changed the dynamics within the relationship? Is he more stressed at work for example?

That said, it's not right to call you such offensive names and not apologise for it, especially if you have told him this and he has continued to do it.

It's easy for us to say what we'd do in your situation but you have to do what is right for you.

AngelAlexa

I would be very hurt. It is awful.

LEJC

Some people have different tolerance levels than others...mine is clearly lower than others...


I would not consider the use of the F word or Tthe C word within any context...but others may deem that acceptable.


Is it a trait that your husband has recently developed or has he always had a tendancy to swear at you?....


If you are uncomfortable about the way he speaks or addresses you then you need to talk to him and explain it...
My grand father always used to say that people only swear because they are not able to use a more educated word in its place...so as such we were not bought up in the type of environment where swearing was common place....
I acknowledge that not every marriage is harmonious all the time and there probably isnt a married couple in the country who has said something to the other in temper and regretted it later...but if he has a basic lack of respect for you then that can be destructive to your future together

jenhug

My daughter has ASD, ADHD and suspected BPD, she manages to not call people names or swear, so its completely inexcusable. (Except for tourettes, although the one person I do know that has tourettes doesn't swear either)!

Seanymph

http://www.womensaid.org.uk/?gclid=CKK78e-kkL8CFdOhtAodMU4A6Q

Phone them and ask them what you asked us.

tayforth

It's not acceptable at all, ever. But you knew that when you posted.

((((Hugs))))

Your post could have been written by me. My ex-H called me names, verbally abused me, you name it. There were periods when he was utterly lovely and charming. I didn't realise it at the time, but this was part of the cycle of abuse.

http://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/cycle_of_abuse.html

He reduced my confidence and self-esteem to zero. Thankfully, I posted about it here when I was at my lowest ebb, and the support I received encouraged me to go to the Samaritans. I had no idea about all this stuff. Within two weeks, I had ended my marriage. I have no regrets - I only wish that I'd left him sooner.

I second the advice on contacting Women's Aid.

And, of course, we are all here to support you xx

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

I'd call him a name.

Ex husband.


(And that from somebody who laughs when called names by boyfriend and mates - it's the context, as I've been winding somebody up and they've yelled 'you f-Ing cheeky b1tch' as part of it, or I'm getting stick for being 'a silly tart'. You should hear what the guys call each other)

The context for you is that he's being an abusive !!!!!!.

ilikewatch

Nobody on a forum is going to be able to tell you what's acceptable or not - it's what's acceptable to you that counts, and the fact you're asking this question on the forum would suggest that you don't find it acceptable.

I know couples who have been in happy, strong marriages for decades and will turn the air blue calling each other f****** b****** c**** for the smallest of reasons. I wouldn't like it (or put up with it), but there's plenty of people who couldn't care less.

RuthnJasper

Definitely unacceptable. The potty-mouthed idiot.

I'm ever so sorry, OP. You deserve more respect and no-one deserves filth like that yelled at them.

I'm no prude and appreciate cheeky banter. But this isn't banter.

Take care; I hope life gets better for you. x