Frump to Fab - Onwards and Upwards

Bitsy_Beans

prudent hugs for you and speedy get well vibes for your DD and your partners brother xxxx

LL no wine here tonight but I've just been thinking about you and your boys and I've raised my cup of tea in toast to your OH. I hope he had a really good send off. Much love to you all xxx

lessonlearned

Good evening lovely ladies

Well what a day. If you could say that a funeral was beautiful then I guess it was.

We even had sunshine......

We had 5 speakers including my brave eldest son who made me feel so proud. He spoke so well - not an easy thing to do. My sweet shy Ds2 wasn't able to speak but I watched him "work the room" talking to everyone, making sure they had a drink and something to eat.. In his own quiet way he is just as kind and as charming as his father.

The eulogies were both touching and funny. My husband was a well loved man and so many people have written to me or came up to speak to me about how kind and generous he was to them. It was very humbling at times.

Our choice of music went down a storm, especially James Bond whilst The Archers caused much merriment.

If I say so myself I even made a good job of the flowers. My son, in his eulogy, mentioned the fact that I had bought them from Costco and the money I had saved had "gone behind the bar" . Cue smiles all round.

To end the day the boys, my sister, my niece and my two closest friends and I went out for quiet dinner. A nice end to a surprisingly nice day.

I'm tired but content. Tomorrow DS2 and I will have a quiet day and draw breath.

Thank you so much for all your kind wishes. I felt that you were all with me in spirit....;)

Fab Friday tomorrow - no slacking...:D

lessonlearned

Prudent. Hope your daughter is doing ok.

lizzie157

pru best wishes for a speedy recovery to your ill family members. Look after yourself too.


Rummer hope you are ok.


tru thanks for your advice. hope you are ok.


LL so glad OH's send off was so good. It sounds beautifully fitting. Look after each other.

myself i'm still not too good but DD1 is coming to stay for a while and i'm fine with that. maybe i can help her get back on track, i have told her she can't keep on like this and we can't be her safety net forever. she has to learn the lesson and move on. i'm still worried about the cat though, my dog isn't going to be happy.

will make the effort tomorrow as we need to shop for school things. i am impressing on the other household members they have to pull their weight because i am not going to put my health at risk any longer.

unfortunately the bl00dy freezer has packed up so more stress.
Must have been very naughty in a previous life.

tru

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Morning :hello:[/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]Prudent You have a lot to deal with I hope things improve very soon xx[/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]LL I'm glad everything went well yesterday I hope you take a couple of days to relax xx[/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]lizzie xx[/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]I thought my osteopath was going to tell me off a couple of days ago. I'd been achy and a bit crampy because of PMS and although I did my exercises, I couldn't do them properly. She just laughed and said not to worry, she allows for that with girls She was pleased with my progress and said I didn't need to see her weekly anymore. I don't feel confident enough yet to leave it too long so I made an appointment for a fortnight's time. [/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]I managed a yoga session without toppling over [/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif]The man-trus are going camping for a couple of days :j :T Although I'll keep up with the perfume, soft feet and moisturiser routine over the weekend, clothes will be taking a back seat. I'm going to wear leggings/yoga trousers and stretchy t-shirts. I'm not going out at all and will have a few short exercise sessions each day. [/FONT]

Rummer

Good Morning Everyone

LL I am glad that the funeral was a fitting memorial for your wonderful husband. Take care of yourself and your boys.

Lizzie Well done for turning your DDs return into a positive. Maybe the time to reorganise the household chores amongst yourselves since you have a new member arriving This could be your chance to take another step back and to get others involved.

Tru How wonderful to have some days to yourself

Today I am quietly rebelling :rotfl: Currently I am having a healthy breakfast then I will get my gorgeous DS up for his breakfast and morning cuddle (yes my 8 month old sleeps through from 8pm till 9am :j) Then my rebellion will begin I am going to put on a dress and some makeup and head off into town for a day of peace and quiet :j All while my son and is daddy enjoy some manly bonding time.

I have looked out a good book and some crochet and will be going somewhere small and snug for lunch where I can read and craft till my little heart is content I am also going to look for some good hand cream, possibly work shoes and Christmas presents

It will be so lovely to leave all the drama behind me for a few hours and I am hoping to come back brighter and less grumpy :rotfl:

lessonlearned

Rummer - sounds like a plan.... Have a fab day.'

Having a lazy lie in. Ds2 made me coffee, the cat is lying at my feet.

Nothing planned. Need to tidy up a bit and might potter in the garden later. Otherwise just a rest today.

Might try and do a bit of yoga later.

Lizzie - try not to fret over your daughters fiscal irresponsibility, nagging her will only make matters worse.

Can you get hold of some money management books or online blogs. There are quite a few aimed at young women nowadays, explaining the importance of female independence and good money habits.

Here's a thought and please don't be offended.

Children learn best from parental example. Maybe your daughter looks at your situation with your partner and your finances and perhaps finds it difficult to square what you are trying to teach her with what she thinks she sees.

Perhaps she only sees lack of money and you being trapped in a situation over which you have little control. She's not seeing the full picture because she doesn't realise how hard you have to work to stretch your meagre budget to keep you afloat.

She sees the graceful swan gliding through the water but not the furious peddling underneath the surface.

Take this opportunity of stepping back a little and making her share some of your burden. She is an adult now and needs to assume the mantle of adulthood and not just enjoy the trappings of being a grown up. She cannot learn responsibility if she is not given any.

We cannot wrap our children in cottonwool - they need freedom to make mistakes and learn from them.

She's back with you but do not let her slip back into old childish ways. Yes she's back with Mum and you will always want to mother her. However she is a young woman now not a babe in arms.

Give her some proper designated household tasks, bite your tongue if she makes a hash of them at first. Step back take a break and let her help and support you. Try and use this time to forge a new bond with her - one that allows her to become your equal and which allows her to blossom a little.

You may find that this difficult time becomes just the catalyst that is needed for you all to turn your lives around

These dark days might become your springboard to a brighter future.

Rummer

Sound advice as always LL

Well I have had a lovely day

I got dolled up and headed off into town. In Dorothy Perkins I tried on a beautiful dress (reduced to £15)which was just that bit too tight, usually I would have bought it however I thought of the advice on this thread and decided I would only buy something that made me look fabulous in the here and now and not when I lose a few pounds

Instead I went to the Body Shop and treated myself to some new hand cream and face powder They had a discount of 30% for cardholders and a free gift so I came home laden with bargain goodies

Coffee was drunk in abundance (without cake )and I managed a good few chapters of my book which I am loving. I didn't crochet as my arm is a bit uncomfortable however reading in peace more than made up for it.

Instead of lunch out I picked up a healthy veggie lunch for OH and I and took it home. When I got in I dyed my hair, had a lovely shower with full body scrub and moisturising and then gave myself a manicure before relaxing with a magazine.

All in it has been a wonderfully relaxing day filled with lots of simple pleasures. Another positive is that I am really enjoying my new veggie lifestyle and have been eating really healthily without missing my usual treats. Next on my plan is to give up caffeine :eek:

sweaty_betty

Rummer that sounds like a fantastic day!

Hope you're doing OK LL and Prudent - hope things have improved with you.

I have had an anti-fabbing day - lots of junk food eaten, not much sleep last night - so much so that I've already had a hours nap on the sofa tonight. I'm going to sleep again very soon in an attempt to catch up on sleep and wake to a fabbing day tomorrow:)

Kiwisaver_2

maman wrote: »

Anyway, she was wearing a pair of shoes like these, but in cream with a (truly horrid IMO) pair of fawn, crimplene type trousers.

You just described what sounds like my Mum: I look at myself now and often think about what my Mum was like at my age. She was old way before her time and has been wearing those M&S crimplene trousers and nana style shoes for the past thirty years - she's not yet seventy.


I think because of her I always aspired to be more glamorous in my older age.