Frump to Fab - Onwards and Upwards

ScarlettMcCain

Just wanted to add my thoughts and best wishes to everyone else's LL. Thinking of you and your family xx

lizzie157

How are doing LL? You sound like you are coping admirably but remember we (your virtual friends) are here in the times when you need us. In the limited experience i have i think it's sometimes after the busy period of all the arrangements that grief hits you. ((hugs))


Have had some bad news myself this morning. A friend of my sons' has lost his Mum. I feel so sad for him. He lost his Dad a few years ago and now his mum. Like you LL he was expecting it but I'm sure he isn't prepared. He really struggled with the loss of his dad.

My problems now seem rather insignificant in comparison but i'm feeling under pressure. I had a bit of a meltdown the other day over a small thing that didn't warrant it but it was the straw.... I ended up in tears as did DD2. I did apologize for over reacting later but did explain i feel taken for granted.

DD1 has to leave her home in a few weeks and as of now still has nowhere to go. She keeps hinting at living back here but as she has cats it would be a nightmare with the dogs, we also have no spare beds. She is supposed to have sorted her debts but we still get calls from loan companies, she is supposed to be working but always seems to be at home and to top it off thinks one of the cats may be ill. I lent her money last year towards vet treatment and have received very little of it back and I can't let an animal suffer so.... but i'm so annoyed to be put in this position... She hasn't asked yet and hopefully it's a false alarm but....

I'm also having issues with the bank who have allowed energy company to take money despite the DD being cancelled so i'm worried they can just take what they want whenever.:mad::mad: Another company I'll never use again.
What a week my life's such a mess at times.

So ladies as you can see am in need of a bit of me time so am signing off to give myself a facial, manicure and pedicure.

Keep at it everyone I'm sure we'll get there in the end.

maman

lizzie157 wrote: »

So ladies as you can see am in need of a bit of me time so am signing off to give myself a facial, manicure and pedicure.

Keep at it everyone I'm sure we'll get there in the end.

Good idea lizzie. Sounds like life is a bit of a mess with you at the moment so do something for yourself that you can control. I find it helps me.


rummer, (as I said)I really hate not being in control of my own life.That's how it felt when I was fat. Although there were people around much bigger than me I hated the fact that I'd allowed myself to get to that state. So eventually (after a gradual increase in weight over 10 years:o) I tried Slimming World. It's the one and only diet that I've ever done and I can't praise it enough. No starvation needed, just healthy eating. It would particularly suit you as it's best done with home cooking and as you're at home with LO it would be simpler.


I don't work for them and I've heard of others really pleased with myfitnesspal or 5:2. Why not go on the website and try the sample 7 day menu and see how you get on. If you did decide to give it a try we have a lovely, supportive SW thread on this board to help.


Hope all the arrangements are coming along smoothly LL. Been thinking of you: ironically I was awake at 4.30 am on Monday and saw that supermoon and then later in the day I drove through a huge cloudburst only to see the rainbow on the other side. I understand how it helped you. We're here for you, now and when you're ready to start rebuilding.:A

maddiemay

Hugs to LL, Lizzie and Rummer (and any one else who needs one), Lizzie - sometimes a meltdown is the only way of getting through to some people, your family put you under such pressure, so continue, if you can, doing things just for you.
Rummer - I am sure that you will find a way that suits you soon, it must be frustrating, but your body is probably still adjusting after pregnancy and child birth, try not to be too hard on yourself:)

I woke in a lot of pain this morning, ankles, wrists and one knee, I was dreading my PT session, but dug out the pain killers, massaged all the offending bits in Magnesium oil and went along. It went very well so was worth the effort. On way home, I popped in local smallish supermarket for milk, salad and veg, had a light lunch and went to do ablutions and change, only to find I was wearing my trackies inside out:o

Prudent

So sorry everyone that I haven't read or posted for a wee bit. Just about to have a catch up session. My adult DD has been very ill & we have had visitors so its been hard to post. I haven't manged much fabbing, but tomorrow is a new day I want to say a big thank to everyone who posted earlier in the thread about the 333 clothing challenge. Its really helping me focus when I buy and item.

Prudent

Oh LL I have just read your post your your husband's death. I am so very, very sorry. I am glad it was pain free and that you were blessed by that beautiful moon. Sometimes we only find beautiful things in the darkness. You are an inspiration and encouragement to everyone and I hope in turn you will find things that will bring hope and peace.

lessonlearned

maddiemay wrote: »

On way home, I popped in local smallish supermarket for milk, salad and veg, had a light lunch and went to do ablutions and change, only to find I was wearing my trackies inside out:o

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Thanks for making me laugh……

Last week I got back from the nursing home one day to discover I had been wearing my cardigan inside out. Luckily I hadn't gone shopping that day or stopped off anywhere else so no-one really saw me.

Lizzie - Sorry to hear you are having such a rough time. Sometimes everything just seems to come all at once doesn't it. Just hang in there and try and find a few moments of quietness or joy in your day. Try not to worry - I know it sounds naff but things do seem to have a habit of coming right in the end.

I must say I do feel for your son's friend losing his remaining parent at such a young age. Losing one parent would be bad enough but to lose both must be more than the poor boy can bear.

I know my boys have taken their father's death very hard. They adored him and even though they are now 28 and 30 they still hero worshipped him. They need love support and comfort just as much as I do.

BTW I really would like to thank you all for all your kind wishes and expressions of support.

Thank you for sharing my sad journey. You have all helped more than you will ever know. I know there will be times when the future looks bleak and when I will feel empty and lonely but I know that I will come out the other side.

My time with my husband might have been much shorter than I would have liked and I do in some ways feel cheated that we were denied a long and happy retirement together. However, I feel privileged to have had such a glorious life with him. The years just flew by. He was a larger than life figure, very charismatic. He just lit up a room with his presence and he seemed to have a huge impact on everyone he ever met. He was full of fun and laughter, with a huge appetite for life and a zest for living. We had a ball. I shall miss him but I shall have zillions of happy memories to fall back on.

Today I met a dear friend for coffee (she and her husband were with us on the day my husband died). She helped me chose the flowers today. It was a surreal and somewhat bitter sweet experience. My friend has bought us a spa day for when everything has quietened down, so that will be something nice to look forward to.

In a similar vein my sister has booked a weekend off at the end of October and she has instructed me that we are going away for the weekend - just us two. It will be lovely to spend some nice girly time with both my sister and my friend.

I think sis and I will go to London. We can see a show, do a bit of sightseeing, a little light shopping perhaps. Not quite sure which show yet. I'm told Warhorse is really something, although I wouldn't mind seeing Miss Saigon again. Both sis and I have already seen it once many years ago but we could both cheerfully watch it again.

People have been so kind and so supportive. As Hemingway said "The world is a mighty fine place". Its also full of wonderful, kind and helpful people.

Today a shop assistant who works in the health shop I frequent and with whom I have a good natter whenever I visit the shop, wrapped her arms around me and gave me a huge hug. I don't even know her name:D

Tomorrow we have a busy day, registering the death, visiting the venue for the reception/wake or whatever you call it, and then meeting with the funeral directors. Both the boys will be with me so I'll be fine.

I've spent a happy time (in a melancholic way if you catch my drift) sorting out photos for a montage for the service, choosing music etc, fielding lots of phone calls from friends and well wishers. Strange, but it's actually been quite comforting to be doing all this. I guess you would call it cathartic.

Anyway enough of my prattle - time for bed.

I really need to start getting some beauty sleep. I'm looking tired and pale. I've got some serious fabbing to do if I'm going to look presentable for the funeral……I've rather neglected myself a bit and my skin is dry and itchy. Time to put in some work.:D

Floss

Big hug from Blackpool coming your way LL to help you through the day.

Floss xx

Julie67

Morning all,

LL so sorry to hear of your loss xx

Well a busy week for me looking after my grandson but today is the last day. Much as I love him to bits, I'm tired out. So glad I had my children early, how women in their 40's do it, I've no idea, I take my hat off to them.
maman I completely agree with you about SW. It's the only diet I've ever done that suits me and all the family. I've lost weight steadily without feeling hungry and feel so much better for it. I've still a couple of stone to go but I know I will get there this time. I can eat like this forever.
Going to to take DGS for a walk shortly and then he is home with his mum early afternoon.
Looking forward to a quietish weekend, dh wants to do some tidying in the garden. It feels very autumnal today even though it's early I know. I can't wait to light the fire:D
We've been trying to find some suitable housing for mum and dad so that they are nearer to us, we might have found something so shall go and have a look on Saturday. Keep your fingers crossed.
Anyway need to get a wriggle on, have a fabulous Friday x

Prudent

Julie67 & Maman Thank you for the contributions about SW. I had a good start to the summer doing things myself. Over the last three weeks I have really slipped. I have had a lot of stress with DD being so ill and stress is always my big trigger. LL I find you a real inspiration in that you find time to look after yourself despite the extreme emotional stress of your wonderful hubby's illness and now your bereavement.

I am on back to basics today of fitting in simple meals, doing something with my nails and begin some cooking for next week when I am back at work.

Hugs & thanks to everyone. When I go back to work on Monday, I know I have some very good things to take forward from this summer thanks to this thread.