Is he moving too fast?

Morglin

You don't want to have sex with him?

Then, walk.......

If you don't lust after him now, you never will.;)

Lin

susieq87

Morglin wrote: »

You don't want to have sex with him?

Then, walk.......

If you don't lust after him now, you never will.;)

Lin

i do, when we were out on wednesday i did wanna jump his bones but then i had had a few drinks in me. i just clam up when it comes to doing the deed no matter how much i want. but like i said earlier i just need to get over the first time and then everything is ok

Morglin

Oh right, well he seems a bit forward, but perhaps things will just occur naturally.

Lin

Zully

susieq87 wrote: »

we havent established a relationship unless this is an unspoken thing that i'm just supposed to know which i dont to be honest. after two proper dates i need maybe a couple more to determine if i can be in a relationship with him. perhaps he will make his move next time which i'm not ready for! *runs*
yeah, i need to talk to him :rotfl:

If the death of my last major relationship has taught me anything, is communication is king, if you don't sit him down and let him know how you feel, he will assume what he will and you will either find him running or him making a move you are not ready for.


I have to say, if i were dating you, i would try to show my affection to you where i could, if your body language suggested that you would be receptive to a kiss, holding hands or whatever, i would take the opportunity, if not i would keep my distance (but also wonder what was wrong with me) i would say that he is being quite gentlemanly, reading you right (maybe pushing his luck a little from what you have said) and not moving too fast, if he understands what you want out of things a bit better im sure he will understand and wait for you to be comfortable.

FBaby

My advice Is done assume his words are reflective of his intentions. Many men say things like that in a light weight way not meaning anything behind it. It's a way to let you know that he likes you nothing more. He probably misses physical contact and seeks it with someone he likes. Don't take it seriously and continue to be yourself. Don't expect anything yet be firm about what your are prepared to do or not.

shiney85

It sounds like it's too fast for you, if it's making you that uncomfortable. A lot of people are being a bit unkind about your new man, looking at it from my perspective and experience, I met my OH online around 15th Oct that year, we met in person on the 29th, again a couple of days later, after that we spent practically every day together and have ever since, we said "I love you" a month later, and he moved in (due to unforseen, but in the end good, reasons!) by December. My OH wanted to hold my hand, was very touchy feely from date one, that's just the way he is, but the difference is, I loved it, still do! If it's putting you off him, let him go and be with someone who likes to be treated that way, and find someone who makes you happy!

whodathunkit

marisco wrote: »

To my mind the OP doesn't have a questionable attitude to this situation. She just comes across as feeling uneasy, around a person who appears to move faster when in a new relationship, than she would like to.

Talk with this guy OP. Unless he knows how you feel, you aren't giving him any chance to adjust how he talks to, and conducts himself around you. If you don't feel able to do that then you have to wonder if you two are really very compatible.

It might also be a good idea to talk to him to find out how he feels and to see how she needs to adjust her behaviour as well. Compromise works both ways.

susieq87

thanks everyone for the advice. i really hate confrontation so i tend to bury my head in the sand until the problem goes away. i will bite the bullet tonight and have a chat with him. i dont want him to think im not interested and also he needs to know that he's making me feel uncomfortable even if he has good intentions

Grumpypoo

go with your gut instinct

silverwhistle

GobbledyGook wrote: »

If he is moving too fast for you then he's moving too fast for you; it doesn't overly matter what other people think.

That's exactly what I thought when I saw the title of the thread before reading any further..

I'm lesbian but because I didn't respond to a woman in a night club quite fast enough (she was too forward to me) she asked if I was really lesbian. Now, I have been to bed with someone I've just met, but every case is different, and I'd go by your _own_ feelings and instincts.