Just needed to be heard for a little while

Waves_and_Smiles

Thank you! She made me very happy, too! If I can manage to get there at Christmas I will do. Right now, I would love to visit her again. She is more of a mum to me than my mother ever was, it was so nice to feel so loved and taken care of. She is also a lovely friend and we talk without any reservations between us.

One thing she did ask if I could do for her was call her daughter. I have only met her once but we did get on very well. SIL has severe arthritis and failed her last medical. She didn't appeal because she didn't feel up to it so signed on to unemployment benefit even though her advisor told her that she really shouldn't try to be working. She is so unwell that she has been unable to get to the meetings and is now on a 6 month sanction. The only money they have is from her partner who took up taxi driving again but he has heart disease and isn't supposed to be working himself and can only do a few hours. They are both very short of money and MIL wondered if I can somehow persuade her to at least try for ESA again. I will do my best although I am dreading another phone call.

oystercatcher

Am so glad your day went well WaS .

It's lovely to hear you are becoming more confident and happy.

Love and hugs

codemonkey

Well done WaS. So proud of you.

As for the phone call, do it if, and only if, its not going to derail your progress.

Waves_and_Smiles

MIL said don't call if it will upset me but she doesn't know who else to ask. She is giving SIL money right now just so that they can pay their bills. But I shall think about that another day, right now I am going to be happy that I saw MIL and admire the flowers she drew all over my hand!

oldestgnome

WaS - given the phone is so difficult for you could you write to her instead?

Waves_and_Smiles

Ooooh, that's an idea, I never thought of that! I shall write to her, that is so much easier then I won't let MIL down. Thank you!

seven-day-weekend

whitewing wrote: »

Have only skimmed it but how wonderful!

I'm looking forward to your Christmas visit now (sort of joking).

I really believe we will all be able to meet up at some point. You'll know who I am....I'll be the pensioner of the party!

Waves_and_Smiles

Awww, I would love that, SDW! I'll be the one under a blanket with a little pug shaped blanket next to me. It was so worth going to see MIL today, I got the biggest hug ever and she didn't let go for ages. I also had a little selfish and introspective moment when I thought, wow she really does love me. Maybe I am not as bad as I think I am, so she helped me there just by being her usual kind self.

What was obvious is that her mind is still crystal clear. BIL constantly says (even to her) that she has dementia and how hard it is for him but she really doesn't. Her body is failing but her mind is as sharp as it always was. I told WaSp that, too and he hugged me because BIL almost had him convinced.

seven-day-weekend

Of course she loves you WaS! You are a dear, kind and generous person who loves and cherishes her son. What is there not to love?

Waves_and_Smiles

Awww, thank you for saying that. I am not used to feeling loved by a maternal figure, I certainly never felt that growing up. She honestly made such a fuss of me, she was even fluffing up cushions to put behind my back. She made me feel very safe and cared for and sat holding my hand and patting it. Happy memories of today will stay with me for a very long time. Plus it really did mean the world to hear her say that she doesn't worry about WaSp because he has me, she knows how much I love him.