Just needed to be heard for a little while

lostinrates

Our dog treats here are many raw Bones ( I am a non evangelical raw feeder) but raw bones are pretty cool addition for most pets. Was chatting to vet today ( my vet centre is a referral vet hospital who is PRO raw feeding! Though also sell dry food ....they'd be nutty not to ) chatting about my animals' teeth and the fact that the cat who hunts more ( and eats more raw ( cars eat mainly non raw, because its easier to provide wet food...see, non evangelical!) has way better condition teeth. Big dog has dodgy old teeth, but I had to feed dry for a long time while unwell.

Waves_and_Smiles

I love that book, haybel! It is wonderful!

I am also loving the dog and cat stories! I made my own cat food for my cat with kidney failure. Most commercial types were too high in protein plus she has no teeth and she wouldn't eat the specialist food. I took everything she liked and blended it into paste with Taurine (which they need) and also mixed her medication in. She happily lapped it up and when she felt too ill to eat it was thin enough for me to syringe feed her. It took effort but it worked.

I am now awake 1am after a completely messed up dream. I was almost 16 and my mother had decided she wanted to be upgraded to a better flat so was throwing away everything I owned. I was so upset but my dad joined in with her and I thought he always chooses her over me. I tried to talk to him but kept slurring my words and losing my voice and couldn't explain how I felt and he couldn't understand me. When I finally managed to talk I fell asleep before I could explain and woke up with even more of my things gone. I knew that I had a flat elsewhere and could move out but felt too guilty to go, I knew my parents needed me to stay. So I just watched my mother throw away everything I had.

I feel very triggered about it, it was metaphorical obviously but covered many feelings that I had while I was a child and covered many different scenarios from abuse to hoarding. I woke up feeling angry, violated, trapped, alone, and misunderstood. It was horrible and I need a hug.

patanne

what a disturbing dream! Virtual hugs are winging their way to you.

lostinrates

Just checking in as also awake, glad I did now.

Was, horrid dream and can see why its triggery. Do you / can you lucid dream or does that risk become confusing between 'worlds'? Sometimes I let dreams run to see what's bothering me , other times I like to take control and create a dream I can better be ok with.

Hope the rest of your night is happier!

Pyxis

((((((((((((((((WaS))))))))))))))))))

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

(((((((WaS))))))). (((((((((WaS)))))))))





Hello Patanne!

dibuzz

Lots of hugs coming your way WaS.

seven-day-weekend

((((((WaS)))))))

Good morning everyone!

codemonkey

Extra big hugs WaS.

whitewing

(((WaS)))

Must be something in the air, WaS. I was dreaming that I was unprepared for my maths, French and something else GCSE exams today. I could remember some maths formulas for trigonometry but not how to use them .

Exam dreams are bad new for me - it means that something is worrying me subconsciously. (I am not studying anything at the moment so no exams even in the distant future).

I have a small, grumbly headache, and I am very tired. I am loving all the new people I am meeting at the moment through work but it is very draining because I am being enthusiastic and doing a lot, but I have to be careful that I am still looking after the other tasks that need doing.

Waves_and_Smiles

Penguin!Good morning everyone, I suppose that I am up. Thank you so much for the hugs. I went back to bed after my dream and laid there for hours thinking of my past, I dozed on and off for a while but now seem to be awake. My emotional reaction to the dream is far stronger than it should be to the content, I understand what it was about, unfortunately and woke up feeling as lost and helpless as I did as a child.

The more I think about it, and I can't stop thinking about it the more it covered different areas of my childhood. It also brought up something that I try to avoid talking about-my dad's compliance. I have no doubt that he loved me but he wouldn't intervene, perhaps couldn't. He was quite disturbed himself by the time my mother was very ill, I don't believe that he had the strength to do anything. I can remember screaming at him once after she had hit me that it was all his fault because he wouldn't divorce her and I hated them both and wished that they would both die. Even though it hurts to admit it he never once told her to stop treating me as she did, he just put in more hours at work and stayed away longer and longer. I hate being reminded of that. The not being able to talk represents me trying to tell him about the abuse, I couldn't. He was ill and I thought it would destroy him and he never told her no, I didn't think that he would tell her no about that either. So I watched what was me be thrown away.