Just needed to be heard for a little while

Waves_and_Smiles

Thank you, whitewing! I am having a coffee now. Actually everything hurts, even my water cyst. I think my body is being hyper-aware which again isn't a good sign. I really can;t afford for this to happen now, not only do I have my psychiatrist on Friday but it is night again and I am alone. I also failed completely after last time to put a plan in place for if it happened again. This will teach me for procrastinating. I am currently touching objects and trying to feel the textures as a way to ground myself, hopefully combined with extra anti-psychotics this will at the very least keep it controllable.

Hahahahahhaa! I would love Gitdog here right now! I would say it's a combination of being run down from a cold, panic over the hospital on Friday and generally the fact that every now and then my chemicals do this for fun. It isn't bad yet, if it stays like this I will be fine. Thinking about it the long sleep should have given me a clue, that tends to happen beforehand.

Anddd the electric shocks down my face have started, yep that's a chemical imbalance. Same symptoms everytime.

System

Checking in hope you're not feeling too bad about the appointment WaS, anything we can do to help? I hate appointments with a passion, my doctor as lovely as she is is always late (probably because she's too nice and gives everyone as much time as they need!) but my god i get so nervous waiting. My leg usually ends up shaking (lol that walsy used to annoy one of my exes)

Was nice seeing my family, and slept much better last night. Mum said she and Dad will take me out for a meal for my birthday so trying to find a nice local carvery as none of us have been to one before.

Also...*ahem* talking to a rather nice guy, still getting to know each other but its nice having the excitement of that. Not rushing into things though!

edit: cross posted. will be here for at least another hour or so is sir pugliet on hand for some reassuring cuddles, if that might help?

Waves_and_Smiles

Aww, MU so glad you had a nice time with your family! And really happy you met a nice guy! Take it slow and just enjoy it, I am excited for you!

My psychiatrist is lovely so I have no problem seeing him at all, it is getting there that is the problem. He lets me sit inside the part of the office corridor (for some reason it always makes me laugh that the psychiatrists have their offices locked away behind intercommed doors, protection from the nutters outside!) that is controlled by intercom so there are very few people while I wait, this doesn't negate the rest of the journey however.

Now I have stomach ache. I probably don't but my body becomes hyper aware of sensation, sounds and touch when my chemicals slip out of whack so the slightest little thing feels enormous. Hurry up and work anti-psychotics.

elsien

So sensory wise you have things you can touch to ground you, the lovely turquoise pictures Pxyxis found earlier in the thread, maybe some of the plainchant type music to listen to, the taste of coffee, (and if all else fails, Gitdog's farts).

And if you need any more distractions, we can grill MU on her new chap.:D

I get stomach pains when I'm stressed. Would a gentle massage help?

Waves_and_Smiles

Hahahahahaha! You do make me laugh, elsien. Right now I am probably more annoyed by the electric shocks down my face. It is always the right hand side and they run from the top of my head down to my jaw line, just as if I was suffering with a shock. It is painful! Biochemically, it means my serotonin is low compared to my dopamine if anyone is interested. On that note I will take my serotonin anti-depressant early too. If all else fails turn to my medicine bag!

whitewing

WaS, just keep writing it all down.

You are not alone, we are here on your thread, and will be popping in and out through tomorrow.

I have my coil appointment tomorrow. DH said he would come but now he is trying to back out. If he hadn't said it in the first place, I wouldn't have minded, but I did tell him that the only way he can wriggle out of it now is to have a vasectomy! (I will see how kind I feel in the morning).

I have had a good day today mood-wise. Some good people have lifted my spirits. Small things but it makes a big difference.

Glad that someone is putting a smile on your face, MU.

elsien

Threaten him with the full Bobbitt - that should do the trick. Is he being a typically squeamish bloke when it comes to "women's things?"
It is nice when the little things people do can make a difference, especially if you're not expecting it.

Waves_and_Smiles

So glad you had a good day, whitewing! I will be thinking of you tomorrow, do drag DH with you, wave scissors towards his lap, that should help!

I shall probably rattle on for the night on and off if I need to. I won't be sleeping again now probably until tomorrow afternoon, certainly not when I have electric shocks every minute. WaSp says he will drive back if I need him to but I would rather avoid it because MIL will panic and there is no point in two of us being distressed. Plus WaSp is a 90 minute car journey away anyway and MIL hardly slept last night so he is running on empty right now. The man needs a nights sleep.

elsien

Keep telling yourself that although it was scary, you did manage last time. So you'll cope just as well, if not better, this time. We have faith in you, so have faith in yourself and your coping strategies.
Are the shocks a neuralgia type thing?

Solarjunkie

I was in Tesco's today supposedly buying socks, but actually checking out slippers to see if they had a tough enough sole to be worn outside for a while, eg on a visit to a hospital or something?
Well, it's a bit late now I guess, but I did see some that would probably fit the bill, or at least fit the WaS!

Would something warm help the electric shocks? A wheatbag or something that can be warmed in the microwave, or just a flannel wrung out under the hot tap? Don't let it get too hot while you have the water running.

There are lots of people "with" you tonight WaS and with every tick of the clock the dawn comes nearer and the birdsong will start again.