Just needed to be heard for a little while

whitewing

Is this your best friend from America?

Waves_and_Smiles

It is. We have been friends for a very long time so of course she isn't going to forget about me. She is allowed to have other close friends and I do want that for her. I just feel like I am saying goodbye already because she will realise how horrid I really am. If I said that to her she would tell me not to be so daft but I don't want to bring it up or it sounds as if I am dictating who she can talk to and I would never do that. I won't let my own self-esteem issues ruin the friendship though, it would be cruel to both of us.

whitewing

I know exactly what you mean, exactly. (i did type a longer reply but lost it).

Did your headphones turn up? Is DO pleased with them?

Waves_and_Smiles

Yes, they turned up and he loves them! He even tested if they work outside at the car and they do. He is very impressed.

whitewing

Now you'll both be hearing voices!

dibuzz

We all seem to be the same with the friends thing, I don't have any at all.
If I start feeling someone is getting too friendly I run a mile, partly because I'm scared and partly because I don't really know what friends do together and would just make a mess of it anyway.

whitewing

dibuzz,

do you mind me asking what diagnosis you have?

I think if we ever had a MSE meetup for this thread, we would all sit in a room not talking to each other.

elsien

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

Thank you, whitewing. I had to have a quick cry after admitting to that. I have lost some very good friendships due to just drifting away. I am so sorry that I did that to people. Any mention of having a wonderful time with someone else and I would think, that's it. I can't measure up and they won't want me anymore. It hurt me terribly to do it everytime but I am sure that it hurt the other people as well.

Although I would never drift I am cringing now that my best friend has found someone that she really likes and gets on with. I am so happy that she has a friend but at the same time I am waiting to be replaced, so I am completely torn. I just don't feel good enough to be her close friend. It isn't her problem at all, I know it is purely mine.

On the positive side though, you recognise what you're doing which is the first step towards thinking about any changes you might be able to make to stop it from happening again. (That sounds so easy, doesn't it - I know it's not that straightforward, but you have a high degree of self knowledge which I think you should give yourself credit for.)


You're not going to be replaced - different friendships offer different things so what your friend gets from you may be completely different to what she gets from other good friends. And let her be the judge of who is "good enough"
to be her close friend.

whitewing

And read elsien's signature.

elsien

whitewing wrote: »

I think if we ever had a MSE meetup for this thread, we would all sit in a room not talking to each other.

You are of course presuming we'd all make it into said room to start with. I have visions of sitting outside in the car then pretending I'd got the wrong day or time.