Hen party present?

trolleyrun

I've never been to a hen party, but I've never heard of presents for such an occasion. Sounds like these family members are extremely selfish, Aileth. Your reply to B2B's snarky text should've been "Where's my birthday present then?". Childish, I know, but they're behaving like kids to be honest.

As to the upcoming wedding, I'd develop a dodgy tum or migraine on the morning of the wedding. Heck, I think I might sprain my ankle on purpose to avoid them I'm sorry you're not getting support from your OH - that must be frustrating.

Timeflies

I've given presents to *my* friends at their hen parties, joky ones along the lines of lingerie and a rolling pin, or often someone will arrange a group present from everyone that goes, e.g. a little photo album with pictures from past occasions with the hen etc.

I do think if you don't go, you don't give a gift. I'd also be less likely to get a present for a friend/relative of my husband. I didn't invite my husband's brother's sister to my hen do, and she didn't invite me to hers. So yes, I think the hen expecting a gift is out of line.

I wouldn't take the bride's sister deleting you from facebook as an affront. I added a few of my sister's hen party guests to facebook in the run up to her hen do, which I organised, and most have deleted me since. It can just be a helpful way to get hold of people when you're planning a do, especially if they're infrequent texters or emailers. You'll probably see the bride's sister once more in your life, at their wedding!

barbiedoll

If I were you OP, I really wouldn't get worked up about a "hen night" present, this is not a recognised tradition, the bride and her sister are just greedy, money-grabbing harridans.

By the sound of things, they're going to be slagging you off, whether or not you buy a present. So why bother? Save yourself a fiver or whatever and let them talk about you afterwards.

As they say, there's only one thing worse than being talked about.
And that's not being talked about!

(And why not go to the wedding, get steaming drunk and make a big show of yourself. You'll be remembered and talked about for years....and will completely steal the bride's thunder haha!)

mountainofdebt

Just thinking out allowed her but do they give gifts at batchelorette (ie US hen) parties?

Is this the next americanism to infect these shores?

barbiedoll

My sister has just been on a very expensive hen weekend where she had the privilege of forking out serious money to join a "Cocktail making class" for the afternoon.

Who needs lessons in how to make cocktails !!!!!!? Everyone knows you just get the dusty bottles from the booze shelf, the ones that are left over after Christmas (2006 or earlier usually), fling them in a glass, add a straw and voila!

These hen weekends get more and more ridiculous every time I hear about them!

lady1964

Goodness me, what next? I can't believe that a hen would expect never mind ask for a gift, I've never heard of it before, and at my age I've been to a few, although not for several years. The £5 funny or personal gift sounds lovely though and one I might suggest to my DD's bridesmaids when my DD gets married next year. Up to them if they choose to go with it but if my DD suggested anything like the OP's money grabbing hen has then I'll be letting her know that people will take a very dim view of that suggestion!

jenhug

Sounds like they are combining the American tradition of a bridal shower with the usual hen tradition. Absolutely bonkers taking or sending a gift. I would send one of those oxfam cards where you buy a goat for a village in Africa in the brides name, or more tongue in cheek, some hens for the Hen!

Mrs_Soup

Never heard of this unless it is chipping in to get the bride a treatment or drinks or whatever depending on what the hen party is. I too would have been relieved to have an excuse not to go.

Bella73

Well as the bride sent you a sarcastic text I would speak to her face to face with witnesses and just ask about the bus outright as you need to decide what you are doing.

I would ignore the hen party present, never heard of that one!

Get them a really really cheap and crap present for the wedding, something from the pound shop would do as she is obviously a bridezilla who needs a smack. Maybe a wooden spoon and she is such a stirrer!

Pollycat

aileth wrote: »

I couldn't attend my BIL's fiancee's hen party due to the fact I was away (I hate things like this anyway, and I didn't know anyone, so it was a good excuse). Apparently I'm expected to give her a present for her hen party?

This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

aileth, you are not in the wrong here.

I hope you manage to get through the wedding, regardless of the behaviour of the 2 stupid women (bridezilla and sister).