Debt Bomb shell dropped on me

tgroom57

financialdisease wrote: »

.... Step change have disappeared, he emailed and called to be told that they have a 3/4 wweek backlog ....

That puts it back to the end of the month ? Fits in with exactly what he wanted- how convenient.

financialdisease

tgroom57 wrote: »

That puts it back to the end of the month ? Fits in with exactly what he wanted- how convenient.

Do you think he could have some influence on how long it will take? I know that he didn't send the letters to the creditors right away like he was supposed to.

Things aren't great between us my anger and devastation have turned to resentment.

JustAboutThere

financialdisease wrote: »

Step change have disappeared, he emailed and called to be told that they have a3/4 wweek backlog and haven't got to his case :shrug: so still in limbo unfortunately

It could be with Stepchange being a charity, they have a backlog and no available advisers for the quoted 3/4 weeks. So, its not outside the realm of possibility the delay has nothing at all to do with your OH.

Best of luck.

Brenny

financialdisease wrote: »

Things aren't great between us my anger and devastation have turned to resentment.

Did you ever manage to speak to someone through your doctor's, work helpline, etc.? I wouldn't dismiss it as it may help you all get through this, if that is what you decide you want to do.

jobbingmusician

financialdisease wrote: »

Do you think he could have some influence on how long it will take? I know that he didn't send the letters to the creditors right away like he was supposed to.

Things aren't great between us my anger and devastation have turned to resentment.

No, I agree with JustAboutThere that Stepchange are probably working as fast as they can - I bet they are totally overwhelmed with applications for help, and a 3-4 week turnaround is actually pretty good. Just hold on in there, hun - I think you'll feel much better once you've spoken to them, if the usual reports on this board are anything to go by. Hugs! (I won't use the hug smiley as it's a bit pervy! :rotfl:)

financialdisease

I am having counselling sessions over the phone through my employer im not sure what I am getting from them other than red stinging eyes from crying! I wish the person on the phone had all the answers, could see into my future or could fast forward 3 months unfortunately thats only a dream :sigh: I need to find and take hold of my inner strength because I am still in this circle of emotion and indecision.

When_the_going_gets_tough

Fd it's a horrible time for you. Has your partner reigned in his spending while he waits, or has he become more 'grown up' about it all? For me his attitude would in some ways be the most important thing. As others say, it is early days , perhaps give yourself a private deadline in a few months to review the situation and in the meantime get out on those mountains that you love.

financialdisease

I am at a stage now where the debt is not the main issue its seeing and understanding just how much he has controlled me, he just can't see it he knows he can be nasty but doesn't agree thats he is controlling im questioning if I want that for the rest of my life and if he can't see it he can't change it sad

in_need_of_direction

He's probably afraid to see it. If he was controlling then the responsibility for the mess is all his. He's still somewhat in denial. Just don't make too hasty a decision.

rubyinthesky

financialdisease wrote: »

Hahaha yeah definitely a joke I guess it was a quick skim read to miss the joke part!

Things are pretty much the same, he is still here not sure that will be forever the way things are going but only time will tell.

Step change have disappeared, he emailed and called to be told that they have a3/4 wweek backlog and haven't got to his case :shrug: so still in limbo unfortunately

I will come back to update when we get any news

I'm just entering my second month with StepChange. I phoned them on the Thursday of one week towards end of March and it was all set up by the following Friday and creditors contacted. Seems a little odd that things would be so behind just a few weeks later.