Nice People Thread Number 11 - A Treasury of Nice People

GDB2222

Generali wrote: »

Thanks. I've been looking for a recommendation for a mindfulness thing.

There are lots of guided meditations around. That was just one of the first links I found.

Mindfulness is partly just concentrating on what's happening right now. For example, when washing your hands feeling the water running over them and enjoying the sensation. Or pausing for twenty seconds to look at a tree.

We tend to rush about and ignore the simple joys around us. For example, I am sitting in bed typing this whilst having my morning cup of coffee, whereas a mindful approach would be to sit outside with my coffee and do nothing else. That way I could experience the beautiful morning that I can see is going on outside my window.

PasturesNew

Watching the first episode of My Last Summer, they touched upon the reactions of their nearest/dearest. One woman had been wealthy and well connected and married for 25 years or so; she said her husband didn't even want to go to her diagnosis with her. 6 months later they split up. He could never deal with it.

Another bloke had 11 kids with 10 women. He and his gf were falling out on camera - she'd known him years, but had only got together with him 6 months before his diagnosis and said they'd not be together if he'd not had that as he was a player and would have been off sooner.

lostinrates

Generali wrote: »

If I just needed someone to hold my hand I could carry round a rubber glove filled with warm custard. What I need is someone that wants to hold my hand. She wants to but kinda can't, metaphorically at least.

I don't think custard is as good as a person who wants to but cannot, personally.

I worry for her as I worry for you is all.

Generali

lostinrates wrote: »

I don't think custard is as good as a person who wants to but cannot, personally.

I worry for her as I worry for you is all.

It's complicated and I'm not really doing her justice here. She's come along to a lot of appointments and has held my hand in a physical sense and also put up with a lot of grumpiness from me when I wasn't dealing with things well.

However, the depression makes her very selfish at times.

GDB2222

lostinrates wrote: »

I don't think custard is as good as a person who wants to but cannot, personally.

I worry for her as I worry for you is all.

Holding hands involves one person making the first move, perhaps risking being rejected, but doing it anyway. Rinse and repeat.

lostinrates

Generali wrote: »

It's complicated and I'm not really doing her justice here. She's come along to a lot of appointments and has held my hand in a physical sense and also put up with a lot of grumpiness from me when I wasn't dealing with things well.

However, the depression makes her very selfish at times.

I get that, really I do, I was brought up in a house hold where there was mental health issues ( us diagnosed ) which I didn't choose (which is why I think the kids are lucky you are a communicative pair) and they have made me DEEPLY untrusting. All I think is, that how mortal you feel might be as mortal as she does when in a depressive episode. Like now.


It must be terrifying, because you both need the other to be strong right now. And knowing she feels not strong doesn't directly help you, but knowing you are loved is very different to knowing you aren't. IMO.



Edit...oh, and IMO, its ok to be unfair here IF you know you are being unfair and venting! not letting it escalate in your mind! I certainly love you enough to listen to some balcony about you not being loved.


Edit. Balcony should have read ...oh beggar, autowhatsit won't let me type americanised spelling for sausage from a place near Modena.

lostinrates

Serious question.

In a world that travels more for business, where time is money and where looking at tourism space travel is serious,

Why haven't we replaced or updated the Concorde fleet?


Turns out DH miss heard. Its NEW York. Makes more sense really. No holiday for me and the kiwi.

Generali

lostinrates wrote: »

Serious question.

In a world that travels more for business, where time is money and where looking at tourism space travel is serious,

Why haven't we replaced or updated the Concorde fleet?

Because passengers weren't inclined to pay enough to make it worthwhile.

Space is only 60 (90?) miles away. That's easy to get to. New York is 1,000s of miles from London (other cities are available).

lostinrates

Generali wrote: »

Because passengers weren't inclined to pay enough to make it worthwhile.

Space is only 60 (90?) miles away. That's easy to get to. New York is 1,000s of miles from London (other cities are available).

Oh. Thanks. That makes sense, in a crazy way I guess.

Does space have good restaurants and museums?
I'll be honest, I think the whole thing looks a bit boring. And the outfits are frightful.

Nikkster

Generali wrote: »

It does sometimes feel like I'm kinda going through this alone in RL. Not quite alone but nearly.

I know it's not at all the same, but we are here for you Gen. You're not alone.

I think most of us are real