Such further or other contact as may be agreed between the parties

brenda10

Bej84 wrote: »

I will lose my life before I stop fighting for my son. Thank you for your encouragement, it's difficult as a father fighting the mother who doesn't accept you as having parental rights.

Every parent has equal parental rights but as the child spends most time with the mother she may well have the parental responsibility for the child. She must inform you if the child is admitted to hospital etc. Do you have your child overnight? I should look back to check this out sorry!
Always inform the mother of anything re medical issues etc when the child is with you, COMMUNICATE by text. Judges look on communication as of utmost important(even though other half may not inform you) keep details of all this communication etc. Bide your time and as I say NEVER give up, if you are a good father your child deserves to have you in their life. Big Hug. xx

brenda10

Bej84 wrote: »

I understand your views none of you no who we are as people it's easy for me to say I'm a great person etc. I am only Human so I'm sure I have my flaws but I can tell you iv never been in trouble with the law I do not drink smoke or take drugs and I'm a scaffolder with a 9-5 I pay over £500 a month in child support and I am the best possible father I can be

My ex is a good mother to our son I have no reason to put her down and I'm not that kind of person to slate her to be spiteful and suggest she is bad as a mother, but as a person she's very difficult and controlling and being that I left her she is very bitter about that.

Sounds like our family member, just a good decent man who loves their child, controlling wife who you could not cope with, sucking the life's blood out of you, she feels now you have abandoned her(no wonder) what good man would leave a good wife. She is out for revenge, to punish you....so familiar.......I totally know of your situation as my family members was the same, I was horrified by some of the things they told me about control, wasn't allowed to go to bed until other half 'allowed them' even when she didn't get up until late and him up at 5am for work. Controlling the purse strings etc.

brenda10

[Well rid of that, that was an existence not a life.

Mojisola

brenda10 wrote: »

Sounds like our family member, just a good decent man who loves their child, controlling wife who you could not cope with, sucking the life's blood out of you, she feels now you have abandoned her(no wonder) what good man would leave a good wife. She is out for revenge, to punish you....so familiar.......I totally know of your situation as my family members was the same, I was horrified by some of the things they told me about control, wasn't allowed to go to bed until other half 'allowed them' even when she didn't get up until late and him up at 5am for work. Controlling the purse strings etc.

This was clear abuse. A woman would be able to go to Women's Aid and get lots of help. A man has very little support in the same situation.

brenda10

Bej84 wrote: »

I understand your views none of you no who we are as people it's easy for me to say I'm a great person etc. I am only Human so I'm sure I have my flaws but I can tell you iv never been in trouble with the law I do not drink smoke or take drugs and I'm a scaffolder with a 9-5 I pay over £500 a month in child support and I am the best possible father I can be

My ex is a good mother to our son I have no reason to put her down and I'm not that kind of person to slate her to be spiteful and suggest she is bad as a mother, but as a person she's very difficult and controlling and being that I left her she is very bitter about that.

Bej84 you sound like my family member not running your wife down, my relative was the same even though she deserved to be run down, there was not one bad bone in his body and she was full of vile, spite, hatred, trying to break the bond and take the child 350 miles away from the father, he had a heart of gold, her a heart of evil.
She thought she owned you and you would put up and shut up, she could take the child off you because she is the MOTHER!!.
At least she is good to the child but be careful that she doesn't start parent alienation because of her fear for the future that the child will eventually chose you over her!!!

Bej84

brenda10 wrote: »

Bej84 you sound like my family member not running your wife down, my relative was the same even though she deserved to be run down, there was not one bad bone in his body and she was full of vile, spite, hatred, trying to break the bond and take the child 350 miles away from the father, he had a heart of gold, her a heart of evil.
She thought she owned you and you would put up and shut up, she could take the child off you because she is the MOTHER!!.
At least she is good to the child but be careful that she doesn't start parent alienation because of her fear for the future that the child will eventually chose you over her!!!

in court she said she does not want our child spending time alone with my fianc! as it is not beneficial for our son. I'm due to wed in august (we have been together just over 3 years now) she says it's not beneficial and that he could be in education or with her family instead of spending time with my partner example if I have to work, sometimes I work Saturdays until 1pm my ex expects me to take my son back to her and collect him again after.

After my court my ex told me that in fact the real reason she doesn't want my son spending time with my fianc! is because he talks about her all the time and he says he loves her and when my ex gets out son ready to see me she says he gets excited and says his going to see Lauren my ex says she is worried one day n son will choose Lauren over her.

I feel I am being punished and not being able to spend a sufficient amount of time with my son because my ex doesn't like the bond my fianc! and son have, I can't help that he loves her he doesn't know any different he was a baby when we got together and I certainly can not control what he says in the 2 weeks that I don't see him.

Bej84

brenda10 wrote: »

Every parent has equal parental rights but as the child spends most time with the mother she may well have the parental responsibility for the child. She must inform you if the child is admitted to hospital etc. Do you have your child overnight? I should look back to check this out sorry!
Always inform the mother of anything re medical issues etc when the child is with you, COMMUNICATE by text. Judges look on communication as of utmost important(even though other half may not inform you) keep details of all this communication etc. Bide your time and as I say NEVER give up, if you are a good father your child deserves to have you in their life. Big Hug. xx

I have over night stays

brenda10

Bej84 wrote: »

I have over night stays

That is good. She was happy with 'her' YOUR child staying overnight with you because she knows you are a GOOD father who puts your child FIRST.
She is thinking of herself and that she will lose 'her' YOUR child to you and your partner because your child is loved by your partner, jealousy and fear!!.
If only she could realise that this child needs extra love and attention instead of being vicious but that is not the way it is all about tactics and CONTROL of the child and the money, money plays a BIG part in all of this, CONTROL because she gets the maintenance money of £500 or so per month while realistically you would be very happy to have your son live with you 50% of the time and your son would have the best of both lives and you could both pay look after your child both spending as needed on your child.
BOT NO she is vicious and has other plans......to cut the contact with you, a Good and Loving Dad with a good loving partner who loves your child like you do.

brenda10

Bej84 wrote: »

in court she said she does not want our child spending time alone with my fianc! as it is not beneficial for our son. I'm due to wed in august (we have been together just over 3 years now) she says it's not beneficial and that he could be in education or with her family instead of spending time with my partner example if I have to work, sometimes I work Saturdays until 1pm my ex expects me to take my son back to her and collect him again after.

After my court my ex told me that in fact the real reason she doesn't want my son spending time with my fianc! is because he talks about her all the time and he says he loves her and when my ex gets out son ready to see me she says he gets excited and says his going to see Lauren my ex says she is worried one day n son will choose Lauren over her.

I feel I am being punished and not being able to spend a sufficient amount of time with my son because my ex doesn't like the bond my fianc! and son have, I can't help that he loves her he doesn't know any different he was a baby when we got together and I certainly can not control what he says in the 2 weeks that I don't see him.

Nasty piece of work she is. So similar, I think they all think the same, all about money and jealous of any relationship with your child. She is insecure and trying to reduce contact in order to limit the amount of enjoyment and bonding your child has with you and your partner, this is not as we know in the child's best interest but proving it is never easy, she may behind backs be talking adult chat about breakup etc to your child and encouraging parent alienation.
Anything positive your child says about his visit with you will be frowned upon and by the time he returns 'she' will have worked on him day in day out to try to paint a different picture of you and your partner. Your child will in time see all this, they are too young but they will cotton on and hopefully they will chose you over 'her' but you must keep the contact and bond, she wants rid of you and your lovely partner. You said she was a good mother earlier, NO you are a good man, she is NOT a good mother but a vicious woman trying to break the bond between the child and getting as much finances out of you as possible. Thank goodness you have a good partner, you are a good man/FATHER

Mojisola

Bej84 wrote: »

in court she said she does not want our child spending time alone with my fianc! as it is not beneficial for our son. I'm due to wed in august (we have been together just over 3 years now) she says it's not beneficial and that he could be in education or with her family instead of spending time with my partner example if I have to work, sometimes I work Saturdays until 1pm my ex expects me to take my son back to her and collect him again after.

After my court my ex told me that in fact the real reason she doesn't want my son spending time with my fianc! is because he talks about her all the time and he says he loves her and when my ex gets out son ready to see me she says he gets excited and says his going to see Lauren my ex says she is worried one day n son will choose Lauren over her.

Whether your ex likes it or not, your wife will be your child's step-mother. She cannot dictate who looks after the child during the time he spends with you.

The way your ex is behaving, I wouldn't be at all surprised if your son would prefer to live with you.