Depression Support Thread

learning_to_drive

Aint been here for a while, but hugs to everyone, bigmummaf, you post so well, very eloquent.

geminilady

rose07 wrote: »

Hi Rose,glad you posted was wondering how you were,you were very down last time you posted.Hope you are feeling a little better now.something you said to Gillette made me think "Sometimes its easier to go along with what we have then break away from the norm as it were"
Thats me to a T LOL,i sometimes feel so lonely for someone to care and just give me a hug but i am finding it really hard to break out of my rut and get out there.Nobody is going to come knocking on my door,i have to get out there but after been on my own(apart from my boys)for nine years it seems such an effort.Have joined a dating site that seems ok,its free and they have regular get togethers all over the country.It is just taking the first step that is hard.Anyway you take care and keep fighting you give good advise on here so next time you are having a bad day give yourself a talking to.

andipandi_2

Hello folks,i would just say that when your OH projects their drama to you that really one has to try to cast it off,we all have our own drama to deal with,theres enough !!!!!! going round in my head as it is,don't need anyone else's,

well my eldest dd is up in court as i write this,don't really know what she will get but first offence and all that hopefully a fine,court costs and maybe some compensation,hopefully she will learn from this because she will have a criminal record now which will affect her employment prospects and travel/working abroad.


regards
Andy

Tulip

Hi Everyone,

Hope you are all well,I am fine,had a rest from my computer last night thats why I wasnt online and I watched tv and really relaxed before I went to bed,today I am off to my parents for lunch and later on I have to clean my flat

I hope you all have a lovely day!

love and light,

Katie xxx

Tulip

Forums Will Close For Critical Maintenance 9pm Thur 9th August - 3am Fri 10th August just thought I would let everyone know

love and light,

Katie xxx

Tiff_2

Hi guys!:hello:

:rotfl:

Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi guys!:hello:
How is everyone? Stupid question on a depression thread isn't it?:doh:
I'm sorry for the lack of Tiffin' this last couple of days but what I need to know is...

WHO LOCKED THE CATFLAP?!!!

It's been a rough few days for the Tiffster but I've tried to keep reading at least, and I hope you guys know that you're always in my thoughts.:A
Right then, time to Tiff if possible.:D Back to page 40 for me!
Look after yourselves everyone.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Sazbo

Take care of yourself Tiff

Sazzy xxx

Tiff_2

Hi rose28454!
How are you hun? Thanks for sharing your problems with us r28 - I'm sure the guys here have made you feel right at home and I'm sorry if i repeat any of their advice.

You've posted an avalanche paragraph here hun and it would swamp anybody. Let's separate the issues to make them into Tiff-sized manageable pieces and see what we have.;)

quote=rose28454;
Hi
I am not depressed but my OH is. He has been suffering for about 7 years on and off now and has tried suicide twice. I am afraid we have great financial poblems and his gettin signed off for a week wont help. He has only been in his present job for 5 months so only gets £65.oo per week. He is having problems with his supervisor anf thinks leaving the job is the thing to do. I am afraid he drinks very heavily and cant seem to make the connection. I dont know what will happen so I am not having a good day. He takes Venflaxine and it does not seem to help but the doctor is not keen to give him anything else./quote

I have to say hun, that with all this going on, I'm almost surprised that you're not depressed. You have both obviously been through really hard times.:o If I've read right, we're looking at...
- finances
-OH's work
-OH's mental health
-OH's drinking.

Finances are practical problems hun and there's nearly always an answer to those. £65 a week isn't going to do it is it hun?:o
If you feel you can cope with it on your own, go over and have a look at :money: 's debt article. In there, is a gold mine of info for you - templates of letters you need to write to the people who need paying, a budget sheet and much more.

If you feel it too hard too deal with r28, what I'd suggest is that you try and fill out Martin's budget sheet, gather up all your paperwork and head for CAB. They will look at your budget sheet and make sure it's accurate, help you plan a budget, check to see if you're entitled to any further benefits, negotiate repayments with the people you owe...
on your behalf if you explain to CAB that you can't manage that and many other things...
...although at £65 a week income, I don't think there'll be much debt repayment - they may just ask for a token amount, like £1 a week/month...

I'm not aware of anyone going to CAB for huge debt advice and not coming out feeling much better - please don't prove me wrong hun!:rolleyes: It's always reassuring when you have a plan, some support and feel a bit more in control of things.

A lot of agencies will sit up and take notice if they see CAB involved. You can ask the people you owe not to phone or visit you at work or home too - CAB will help you with all that hun and it should give you some breathing space. Make sure you tell CAB the whole story as you have here because their knowledge over a huge range of issues is immense.;)

What's the problem between OH and his supervisor angel? Could it be that he's finding working too much to deal with? He may be entitled to DLA if his mental health really impedes his daily life.

Has OH regularly been employed before this? Do you have children? Are there any mental health agencies involved with OH hun - psychiatrist? CPN? Are social services involved? I'm not being nosy hun - just trying to see the overall picture.;)

After the finances, the drinking, mental health and work may be feeding into each other. I'd say your first stop with all this is the dr hun - with or without OH. As you're the one living with OH, you are the expert on OH's current health/work/drinking situation. Don't be dismissed - persevere until they see that things are bad and more support is needed. The dr is the one who can help with all 3 issues here.

I know it must be incredibly hard hun, but try not to have any confrontations with OH. He might be much more willing to co-operate if he feels supported rather than threatened.;) I'm not saying that's how you are angel at all, but from the little info you posted, he sounds very down and needs to see his dr.

You are very stressed and it won't help you either. Again, you've had a lot to deal with and if you feel you need support hun, there's nothing wrong with asking for it.;)

I've been down into the Tiff archives,:rolleyes: , and here are a few links that may help you both hun. I'm not a professional hun and I haven't read the contents of the links so don't take this as anything definite. Different people are in different situations.;)

http://www.adviceguide.org.uk/ - (CAB's site)

http://www.sane.org.uk/public_html/About_Mental_Illness/Links.shtm


http://www.turning-point.co.uk/ - alcochol-related

http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/Understanding/Understanding+addiction+and+dependency.htm

http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/Understanding/Understanding+dual+diagnosis.htm

http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/index/Staying+in+employment.htm


I've probably swamped you with too much to read angel -and it's not meant as a substitute for the dr or CAB or mental health services. They should be the very first people you see.
Anyway hun, I hope at least part of this has helped. I wish you all the best angel.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Sazbo wrote: »

Take care of yourself Tiff

Sazzy xxx

Hey sazzy!:j
How are you hun? Always good to hear from you.:A Here, have an extra blue smartie and a Tiffy hug!
Much Love,
Tiff xxx