Depression Support Thread

BizzyBek

Miro have a *hug*

And Dawn - yes it is the feeling of lonliness that has got me at the moment. I think some of it is because we have just come out of the Xmas season where it is rammed down our throats that everyone is in a big happy family/community plus most us go into hibernation so we don't even get that random speak to shop assistants etc so you go days without seeing anyone. Well I do!

geminilady

Miroslav wrote: »

Just a quick hello/goodbye/happy easter/Merry Christmas 2008 etc etc.

I'm taking some time away, my head isn't right, I don't know where my life is going, I can't accept who I am, or to be more precise, my faults (which I must have to be the way I am) and neither can anyone else accept them, so the future looks very bleak and non existant at the moment. This month will be the 16th (!!) anniversary of my partners passing and between now and March is always tough and it seems to get tougher each year.

As silly as it sounds, we all have things to lift us up sometimes and Britney is my one thing, so when things are going wrong there, it just hammers another nail into my coffin, as the the thing that cheers me up, is being destroyed. I'm still enjoying all her things, but the person behind those things is looking more and more closer to the edge. This isn't the reason for my depression, it just adds to the woes!



Anyway, take care all of you and I hope to return again in the future, if and when I start to get anywhere with my pathetic waste of life that some person who has passed, could have made more of.

Just to finish...

A farmer's field of cows had all frozen with the recent cold weather when an old lady came along.

"Here", said the old lady, "let me help you out"

She started rubbing one cow and slowly it became unfrozen.

"What the..." said the farmer to his friend

The old lady went over to the next cow and started rubbing it and that one too became unfrozen.

"Amazing" said the farmer

The old lady continued going from one cow to the other and she unfroze them all.

"Thank You" said the farmer

"Not at all" said the old lady, who went off on her merry way

The farmer turned to his friend and said "How on earth did the old lady do that?"

"You know who that was, don't you" said the farmers friend

"No, who?" replied the farmer

And the farmers friend replied


















"Thora Hird"

:rolleyes:


Take care everyone, I hope to cross your paths again one day :wave:

Hi Miro:hello: Your joke made me smile and it shows no matter how bad you are feeling you have not lost your sense of humour.I know this is a bad time of the year for you but the days will pass and it will soon be spring.
Unless we have a well thought out plan none of us know where our lives are going thats the thing about life anything could be round the corner.As to faults show me someone who does not have them they do not exsist.What do you want out of life?If it is to meet someone one thing i do know is nobody is going to come knocking on the door.ok the odd person might meet someone waiting for a bus or in the supermarket but most people meet at places where people get together, not nessaseraly pubs(don't think you drink) but clubs,the gym,night classes ect.Just a thought but are you a member of a Britney fan club?maybe they have get togethers in your part of the country.It is always a good start if two people meet that have something in common.Just an idea,but it makes me mad when you keep saying nobody could want you
or accept your faults how do you know unless you give them a chance?As far as i know you have only had two relationships in the past 16 yrs not much to form a judgement on really lol.There is a saying that you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince and it goes for guys to,you are far to young to give up so you hang on in there.Your partner who passed loved you so deep down you know you are NOT unloveable.Anyway hope things start to look brighter soon and you only have to read this board to know that there are people out here who care.

Bunnie1982

Things have not been going well here as of just lately and I have slipped worse than I ever have before.

Things haven't been good with my marriage...I can't go into too much detail on here about things in case my husband comes here and reads and it would complicate things even more.

After working in a temporary job for 10 months I applied and got a permanent job, however I have been completely unhappy there and have been signed off since mid December with stress and anxiety because my boss was bullying me....I raised this with HR and was told I just had to deal with it and that's the way my manager is.

So obviously I have gone off on sick and have handed my two months notice in which runs out mid February so now I am stressing about money.

I feel like I have completely and utterley messed up my life with things, I have been harming really badly over the past week and have thought about ending it all.

Up until now I felt I had a reasonable support network of friends, however a couple of them have turned their back on me when I need them the most and now I am just a mess.

I don't know what to do anymore! I just spend most of the days crying and not wanting to get out of bed, I haven't eaten since Thursday and have started taking sleeping tablets to help me sleep at night.

antronella

shazrobo wrote: »

sorry your feeling fed up and lonelytonight, it takes some getting used to dosent it? feel like that most nights, thats why i'm always on here, watched casualty earlier, that was the best part of sat night
hugs
shaz x

I've been watching cr*p...forgot casualty was on

antronella

Bunnie, sorry to hear you're feeling so bad. Is there no way you can talk to your OH about how you're feeling? ..or is he too much a part of the problem? I hope your GP is giving you support, maybe you should make another appt next week and go and update on how you're feeling. Sleeping pills aren't that great an answer long term (frome experience) .

I know what you mean about friends falling by the wayside. Think sometimes they can't provide a quick fix..don't see any improvement and just give up trying. This is what happened to me, apart from I would say 1 true friend, who has been wonderful and has never given up on me.

Its not easy to cope if your marriage is going badly..would OH consider relate? or could you go on your own to help make things clearer to you?

Please look after yourself, thinking of you x

shazrobo

(((((bg hugs))))) bunnie, sorry to here things haven't been going well for you lately, sleeping pills arn't the answer long term as antronella says they cause probs long term, i ended up addicted to them for a while. know what you mean about friends, my mum is the only one who is still there to listen, and i know she finds my crying all the time hard to deal with. i think you need to make another appointment with your gp, as you sound so low, mine is great, hope things improve soon
shaz x

Bunnie1982

My GP is fantastic, got another appointment with her this Friday, my husband is coming with me because he is concerned about me. We do talk about things a lot but there are things in the relationship that are very complicated.

I think out of all my friends I have got one male friend who I can turn to, not necessarily to talk about my problems but just generally for a chat as he is the only person at the moment who can seem to make me smile and laugh.

I don't like to put on him with my worries as he has got a lot of his own problems at the moment and admitted to me a few days ago that he thinks he is suffering with SAD.

My family are not much help as they don't seem to understand....they just tell me to pull myself together, husbands family are not much help either, in fact they are even worse than my own.

Sugar_Coated_Owl

Stephb1986 How are you? Has your chest infection cleared up?

Hope your weekend with your boyfriend went well.

ilovegreatdanes How are you feeling? Any better? Have you been taking anything to help with the cough?

BizzyBek :hello: Where did you buy your light box from and how often do you use it? Are they expensive?

What kind of negative thoughts are you experiencing?

You have lots of pets! What animals are they?

What AQA questions are you doing?

juno Your piercings are cool :T

Tiff How are you? I haven't spoken to you for ages. Have you got any trips away planned for this year? You seemed to really enjoy the one last year. How is your Mum?

I don't want to waste the Dr's time Tiff. It's pointless them checking it out when I know I'm only going to cut again.

I saw my social worker on Thurs. what a waste of time. I must have been with her for about 15mins. I showed her the cuts and she just asked whether I knew about distraction techniques :rolleyes: then she said she would send me a leaflet thing in the post and then said lets arrange an appointment for 1 months time :mad: How the hell can 15mins a month help me! Stupid waste of time. I'm tempted not to go next month.

I'm sick of being an in-patient. So don't want to go back there.

In all seriousness I hope 2008 is the last year I see. If I, or anyone for that matter don't want to live what right do so-called professionals have over it. It's not their life :mad:

Anyway, sorry to rant. Thank you for the advice Tiff (((HUGS)))

gillette147 How are you? Sorry to hear things are tough at work. Am I right in thinking you're leaving that place soon?

I guess to those that have never self-harmed it is a difficult thing to understand.

feelinggood It's good to see you posting How are things with you? Are you still going to the meetings? Are they helping?

Thanks for the advice re: self-harm. Glad to hear that it's helped you.

Limana68 Try not to feel bad about being off work. The Doctor wouldn't have signed you off if he didn't think you needed it. Make the most off the time off to try and sort things out. Maybe, if you feel up to it of course, you could look at what kind of job you would like to do and start looking into that. It might make you feel slightly better too.

Horace I hope the work trial on Monday goes well. What kind of job is it?
Congrats. on the competition win :T

How is your eye? Is it back to normal yet?

How are things with you and your boyfriend? I hope he's apologised to you.
Well done on buying all you Christmas presents already :T that's definately moneysaving!

cat saving expert I'm sorry to hear about your counselling experience. Did they say when they will contact you? If you don't hear something soon or you start to feel worse, make sure you go and see your GP.

Can I ask, why are you only allowed 6 sessions with a counsellor? Can you not ask for more or is that just how it is?

jen.eng Haven't spoken to you before so first of all HELLO. Thanks for the advice. I think you're right it would be a good idea to keep a supply of steri-strips.

How are things with you?

BigMummaF How are you? I hope you had a lovely Christmas

Tulip Did you get a Nintendo DS for Christmas? I've been playing Mario recently. I love that game. Are you enjoying brain training?

Did you watch your new DVD today? Did you like it? What's the storyline?

queensway_boy Sorry to hear about your MIL and FIL being in hospital. How are they doing?

shazrobo It seems like you've got quite an enjoyable week coming up. It sounds like it's much deserved as well.

I hope you get some help with your children.

antronella :hello: Glad that work went well. Are you finding the phased return beneficial?
Well done on setting up internet banking :T

dawnylou (((HUGS))) What's happened to make you feel like this re: counselling. Do you not think it's helping?

meyore Can't you request to see another Doctor? You really should see someone if you're still strugling with anxiety.

Where abouts in Surrey will your husband be working? Is it Deepcut?

Miroslav So sorry to hear that things aren't good with you atm. I really hope things do get better. You will be missed on this thread. Please feel free to return anytime you need some support (((HUGS)))

Bunnie1982 Sorry to hear about the bullying at work. IMO HR should have done something about your manager. It isn't fair that you've had to leave because of it. Is there anyone else you can complain to?

You say you feel like you've messed up your life. Do you want to talk about it further? If you don't mind me asking, how old are you?

Make sure you're looking after your cuts.

Are you on any medication and/or seeing a cousellor/CPN?

(((HUGS)))

GOODNIGHT all xxx

Miroslav

geminilady wrote: »

Hi Miro:hello: Your joke made me smile and it shows no matter how bad you are feeling you have not lost your sense of humour.I know this is a bad time of the year for you but the days will pass and it will soon be spring.
Unless we have a well thought out plan none of us know where our lives are going thats the thing about life anything could be round the corner.As to faults show me someone who does not have them they do not exsist.What do you want out of life?If it is to meet someone one thing i do know is nobody is going to come knocking on the door.ok the odd person might meet someone waiting for a bus or in the supermarket but most people meet at places where people get together, not nessaseraly pubs(don't think you drink) but clubs,the gym,night classes ect.Just a thought but are you a member of a Britney fan club?maybe they have get togethers in your part of the country.It is always a good start if two people meet that have something in common.Just an idea,but it makes me mad when you keep saying nobody could want you
or accept your faults how do you know unless you give them a chance?As far as i know you have only had two relationships in the past 16 yrs not much to form a judgement on really lol.There is a saying that you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince and it goes for guys to,you are far to young to give up so you hang on in there.Your partner who passed loved you so deep down you know you are NOT unloveable.Anyway hope things start to look brighter soon and you only have to read this board to know that there are people out here who care.

:wave:

I've always laughed in the face of adversity. I don't feel like laughing, I just have to keep a sense of humour or i'd be done for!

Well, eventually I wish to meet someone, but not someone for the sake of being with someone, it has to be the right person. I've got this far on my own....somehow! I have high standards in what a lady is like for me. They aren't out of the ordinary, but all the ladies I meet seem to be bed hoppers, foul mouthed, pretentious or a mixture of all 3. I know all women aren't like that, but the ones that aren't are usually taken by a bloke who doesn't treat them right - horrible men are a pain in the backside! Having had one very good relationship, albeit when young, has risen the bar for any potential Mrs Miro's - personality, sense of humour, caring and non materialistic - apply here :rotfl:

I'm not a part of any Britney fan club. My interest is a personal one and something I share with no-one - I speak about it more on here than anywhere! My flatmate knows but I rarely talk about it and other people know, but I don't talk about it. It's a private thing for me and a fan club/get together is not my sort of thing.

I'm not one for giving people chances, I admit, possibly because my 2 'relationships' since my partner passing have been with 2 self indulgent, compulsive lying witches They haven't exactly made me feel positive about myself with comments such as "If I wanted someone because of looks, I wouldn't be with you" and "If I get pregnant, I may want an abortion without telling you" - charming eh?

I just don't expect anyone to get past the emotional baggage and the fact I am not physically perfect - infact, I can think of 2 things, fixable by operations that cost alot of money that would make any woman who relied on physcial attributes over personality that finishes my hopes off. I guess something must be wrong as i've not been backwards all my life and despite people telling me i'm not as bad as I make myself believe, i'm not exactly appealing to women it seems. The only comments I get are about my height and build and that's as far as it goes The lack of interest is there for all to see

All I really need is to be wanted, which I haven't been for such a long time. I was an unwanted child, a mistake, and i'm the one that has paid for it and it's made me angry, anxious and depressed, like so many on this thread.

I long for the day I actually start to get somewhere with someone, my brief relationship with 'S' last year was exciting to a point, but looking back on it, if anyone else had that kind of relationship, i'd fear for them! It was self-destructive!

Anyway, typed too much. Thanks for replying and thanks to all the others for their good wishes.

I do need some time away, to sort my head out and i'm of no use to anyone here right now.

I shall return - in 1 day, 1 week, 1 month, I don't know...so I won't see any replies from now on, but I wish you all well and you all have my best wishes - every single one of you, old and new.

If I can be of any use to anyone (!) my PM box is set to send any PM's to my e-mail inbox and as i've found it sends the actual PM message not just a message telling me I have a PM. So, if anyone needs any Britney info, info on a holiday to Czech Republic or Slovakia or any general man advice (:rotfl: ) PM me

I'm not any good at DIY though so no DIY advice questions :cool:

Oh and Britney's new single 'Piece Of Me' is out very soon - buy it and you'll help Britney get a high chart position which will make her cheer up and in turn will make me cheer up and maybe get Britney and I together.

Then you'll all have a wedding to attend at some point

Take care everyone :T

antronella

RBK, how on earth did you manage to do that post with everyone's name on it?!!!! :T WOW!! I am so very impressed! it must have taken ages and its really thoughtful that you would include everyone like that x

What you said about not wanting to be here makes me feel so sad..and I'm just so sorry you feel like that. Do you have anyone thats close to you that you can talk to? You never know what can happen in the future...don't give up hope that life may get better for you. All that advice and compassion you're offering to people...what would you be saying if one of us was feeling how you're feeling now?

Anyway..work was much better than I expected thanks..but then i've only done 2 days!! We'll see how next week goes. Thanks for asking and for mentioning the banking. I keep logging in, just to have a look! can't say there's much going on..but hey!...good to keep tabs on how little I've got in there!

I'm off to bed now..hope you sleep tonight xx