Depression Support Thread

shazrobo

hi bmf, yeah i did manage to get my son a new bed thanks, hope it lasts him longer than the next one.
specialk, hope your kitchen dosent get as messy as mine did this morning, the kids helped make a lasagne and their was tomato sauce splashed everywhere, kitchen looked like a bad accident lol
antronella, good luck with the stopping smoking, as you've done it before you can do it again. i stopped smoking myself when i first found out i was pregnant all them years ago, and like yourself have started again in times of stress, except for this time, i promised my sons back in june that i would no longer smoke in the house, and as its too cold to go outside, i havent even bothered going to the shops for any. have to admit i have started drinking again, but am going to try my hardest to stop on the 1st jan.
big hugs to all
shaz x

santashelper_2

hope everyones well

feeling down today with the start of a cold only got over a cold 2 weeks ago fed up used to go to the sales when i was working to boost my moral now i cant afford to it gets depressing.

My husband is happy just sitting watching the tele all christmas and cant understand why i get so down, some people are easily pleased i guess.

Anyway feeling tired now so will talk later

take care everyone.

Tulip

:hello: Everyone,

I had a good day at my friends house,Had lunch there and it was nice Had a couple of white baps with corned beef,tomato,red onion(raw) and that was nice until I felt the tears go into my eyes from the onions I was eating :rotfl: my friend went to a match and I chatted to my other friend who was also there I went to visit a friend who lived in the road next to them for an hour until 4pm then I went back to my friends house for tea,I then rang dad at 6pm to see if he could collect me and he did and he drove me back to my flat I am all bathed and nice and warm and snug for the evening now,watching Casualty soon,Havent been on dslite today as I havent had time A friend got me a dog toy as a christmas present and its lovely We are all going out on New Years Eve for a drink at the pub then I am going to sleep at my parents house and go back on New Years day afternoon


Shaz,You sound so much brighter about things and that is really good to read

StephB, hope you get well soon and ILGD Hope you get well too

Have a lovely evening and I will chat tomorrow

Night! Night!

love and light,

Katie xxx

EthelBloggs

hi guys.. hope you're all ok :wave:

Christmas was pretty much uneventful other than my ex husband turning up at my mum's on xmas eve with his wife and my mum inviting them in for tea like they're all bessie mates :eek: :mad: Same thing happened on Boxing day although this time I wasn't there so didn't have to grit my teeth and sit on my hands. Since then all I've heard about is how nice and understanding the wife is and how she really does understand my mum's situation and blah blah blah. So yesterday I had enough and told my mum she can be as friendly as she likes with them but please please don't go on about it, I really don't want to know, so now she's taken offence and not speaking to me Am I really that unreasonable to be hurt that my mum is so friendly with my ex-husband when she knows how bad things were when we were together and the harm he has caused? It just feels as tho she's being really disloyal to me.

Anyway.. I've had a fair amount of time for navel gazing too lately, plus I have a fab new counsellor who seems to know how to ask questions which make me think about things in a different way. I think I've had a bit of an epiphany but I'm not ready to articulate it yet into proper words and share it, I will tho in a while.

Both kids are home from hospital until new year's day which is really nice.. bit chaotic and a bit scary sometimes but we're managing and no one's killed anyone else yet, no blood on the walls or carpet etc

I know some of you are having a really rubbish time at the moment and you're all in my thoughts and I'm wafting good vibes your way often during the days I would say in my case that I'm currently less depressed than I have been and managing my feelings much better, although sometimes when no one's around I howl and wail and cry like a banshee

I just hope 2008 will be a much better year for all of us and am holding on to that with all my strength. Wierd, I had lots of stuff I wanted to share but now I'm actually doing it, my mind has gone blank so I'll leave it there for now.

Lots of love and big huggs for you all xxxxxxxxxxx

shazrobo

hi ethel, good news about the children been out of hospital, how old are they? i dont think your been unreasonable towards your mum, i would expect my mum to be loyal to me too. hope you get it sorted out with her soon hun.
glad the counselling is going well, i'm going to see my counsillor for second time on monday, in a way i'm looking forward to it, prob cos i spend too much time on my own with my 2 ds's, be nice to see another adult for a change.
big hugs
shaz x

EthelBloggs

hiya shaz, I've got a 15 and a 17 year old :eek: Sorry, I forget sometimes that a lot of people on this thread don't know me cos I used to be a proper old timer on here and now i'm a less frequent visitor I do read almost every day tho How are you doing, you handled that ex of yours really well, I know it must have hurt like hell doing it tho.. I've had more than my share of wrong'uns in my time :eek:

I had 3 sessions with this new counsellor in december and now don't have another til 18th of January and it's wierd cos at the moment all that stuff with my mum is just making me want to talk to him about it and I feel a bit bereft if that makes sense? I can sort of talk to OH about it but he just gets angry on my behalf and that doesn't really help when all I want is a bit of a whinge, you know?

shazrobo

i know what you mean, with all this stuff going on with my ex, i've so wanted to speak to my counsillor about it, so hard dealing with it on my own. have managed not having to speak to ex today after i turned my phones off, but when i looked at text messages tonight, hes sent me a few today, and he still hasnt got the message, still telling me he loves me and we can work it out,he has even rang relate to make us an appointment . i'm beginning to think i'm crazy and that maybe he does love me, and i'm making a mistake throwing away a relationship, especially as i find it so hard to be alone.
sorry for long post, wish i could just get my life settled one way or the other
shaz x

EthelBloggs

don't be daft, nothng to be sorry for! make your posts as longas you like
it seems to me that he's realising that you're not the pushover he thought so he's upping his game to manipulate you further. He wants you to doubt yourself and your judgement and decisions because that gives him power over you.

It is hard to be alone, but isn't that better than just settling for 'anyone' rather than having no one? You deserve so much more than that and it will come along when you're ready for it. Are you much of a reader? two books I found really helpful are

Why Does He Do That - Lundy Bancroft

and

Women Who Love Too Much - Robin Norwood

I won't say they solved all my problems but they helped me to look at things in a way that I hadn't before and to find a better way to handle men/relationships

shazrobo

morning all, how is every one this morning?
ethelbloggs, just ordered "why does he do that" sounds like they describing my ex, thats two new books i've ordered from recommendations on this thread, looks like i'll be doing a lot of reading in new year, when kids back at school.
planning on going to cinema with sons this afternoon, with sons, to be honest too tired to take them anywhere else they quite hard work, but they love cinema, so easy afternoon watching, "mr magorium's wonderful toy emporium"
big hugs everyone
shaz x

EverDecreasingCircles

Hi everyone

Hope those nasty cold/flu bugs are finally leaving you all and you're all feeling better.

Ethelbloggs, I totally relate to the situation with your mum, albeit in a different situation. Mine isn't over and ex-OH, it's over and ex-brother. I can't go into detail here but just wanted to let you know I understand how hurt it makes you feel. You're right to expect her loyalty.
I also know how hard it is when you can't speak to your counsellor. You always need them the most when they're unavailable.

Shazrobo, i've been reading some of your posts. Things are really hard for you now, but it will get better in time. I can see you're trying really hard to stay positive and get through it all.

Everyone else, sorry I can't mention everyone, but take care of yourselves. Hope today brings you all a little bit of sunshine.

Jen x