Depression Support Thread

dawnylou

BMF - So sorry about your news. It is always the way. I don't know know why the nice people always have to suffer

I used to believe that it was because God wanted the better people for angels - however from things that have happened since I no longer believe we have a God or surely he would not let us suffer so??

I don't know.

It makes me feel so much worse when genuinely nice people suffer from things like cancer. It makes me sadder about life in general. It also makes me feel pathetic when I am so low - my Fiance's Aunt had cancer for years until it eventually stoler her from us.
She was soooooooooooo lovely. Caring and nice.
And yet she was always all smiles, never complained. I wish I could be more like that!

Got a letter today.
First appointment with counsellor on Tuesday.

And it's a man!!! I assumed it would be a woman. Don't know why.
I am so scared.

What if I am unable to talk and he thinks I am just a time waster?
I can't stop thinking about it.

And there I go again. All full of self pity.

I don't even deserve to still be here.

I wish I could have gone in place of Mary.
She was worth so much more than me. Working as a nurse she was useful and caring. What do I do for anyone? What have I ever done for anyone?

*Sigh*

shazrobo

told bf that he has hurt me so much, and i cannot accept been treated the way he has treat me. he said he will always love me.
i'm sat here crying now feeling so alone, so hurt, wish i wasn't here any more, dont want to be by myself again.
wish i never wake up again

antronella

Shaz, i am so so sorry you are hurting so much, but by reading what you said about your boyfriend I really think you have made the right decision. What you said about 'walking on eggshells' I can relate to so well. I left my husband after over 20years of marriage and that is how I spent much of my life with him.
It is easy to remember the good times when you're alone, but do try to concentrate on the reasons you have decided 'enough is enough'. I really do sympathise with you...a lot of the time I'm lonely and wonder if I made the right decision...but I have to remind myself, like you must...that we deserve better. I'm thinking of you Shaz xx

shazrobo

thanks antronella, for your kind reply, i know i've done the right thing he has just phoned me, saying more nasty things, denying stuff that he has said in the past, saying its all in my head. god he has hurt me, and i know i'm prob better off without him but i feel so hurt and alone
shaz x

antronella

Shaz, I had the same..with my hubby telling me it was all my doing...my fault etc even now he doesn't think he is to blame at all. I found a website about verbal abuse (just google it)...Dr someone, its american, but it was really helpful. it doesn't mean the person is always abusive, but people like this have certain traits that are very similar. Now I know that my decision to leave was right, though as I said I'm still struggling. You can do it...just ask for support...x

antronella

...and by the way...my husband wants me back, says he will always love me...but....that I need to change ....x

shazrobo

thanks, had a look at that site, very interesting, will read more tommorrow. sorry to hear you've been thru the same, sounds like there is a lot of it going on. my now ex bf says it was me, that made him say things cos i wound him up with my depression?
said i needed to change my ways too and accecpt that hes trying to help me?

antronella

Yes, very familiar...have suffered with depression for bout 7 years too..on & off, and was told the same. Try go to bed and switch off your thoughts if you can. tomorrow is another day. Nite nite, hope you sleep xx

shazrobo

thanks for chat, i've turned both phones off for tonight, so he cant ring again. goodnite,
big hugs
shaz x

rose07

Sazbo wrote: »

You've got it x

hi sazzie, hope your ok atm? xxx

Tiff wrote: »

what sazzy said!

With you all the way bmf hun!
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Hi Tiff hun, hope you are keepin fightin atm, as you say one step at a time eh? take care xx

BigMummaF wrote: »

But I may need your help folks.......

yeah what they said mumma

seriously, were with you all the way, esp me, i will be here for you, like you have been for me, i never forget the ones that help me, and you have done just that for me, which im truly grateful, you will always have a place in my heart mumma, you have a friend for life in me

for you mumma:

You and I must make a pact, we must bring salvation back
Where there is love, I'll be there

I'll reach out my hand to you, I'll have faith in all you do
Just call my name and I'll be there

I'll be there to comfort you,
Build my world of dreams around you, I'm so glad that I found you
I'll be there with a love that's strong
I'll be your strength, I'll keep holding on

Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter
Togetherness, well that's all I'm after
Whenever you need me, I'll be there
I'll be there to protect you, with an unselfish love that respects you
Just call my name and I'll be there

anytime you need to vent, talk, or let things out, i will be there, need a shoulder to lean on, i will be there, need a hug, i will be there, even if you need someone there, i will be there (i have been known to travel to see some in need hun), so mean it anytime you need, just pick up the phone, ya got me number, so use it, and no carp bout me havin my own stuff, i know i have a whole heap of things on atm, but your a very special person, so anytime, rain or shine, im here

take care mumma

xxxxxx