Depression Support Thread

Tiff_2

shazrobo wrote: »

son, been excluded from school again today, just when i was begining to think he was settled there, i knew there had been some bullying going on, and i informed staff, who said they were dealing with it, and they knew my son wasnt to blame, and were protecting him, but the bullies got to him again, and hes finally lost his temper, and hes the one thats excluded:mad:
so fed up could just cry all the time
shaz x

shazrobo wrote: »

morning all, hope everyone ok this morning.
feel bit better knowing that my son is at home with me, and not getting bullied at school. he is a bright lad, but emotiuonally immature, and even though its not a mainstream school, he is getting bullied badly, its just not fair. talked with him last night about the possibility of home schooling, not sure in the long term tho, it would mean i never get a break at all from him.
going to ring school up later and see what or if any plans are going to be put in place to protect him
ccstar, well done on getting jobs done, an achievement, when we not feeling our best
ilgd, i put my tree up too, more for kids sake, they were pestering for it, but like you i'll be looking forward to taking it down in jan
big hugs to all those that are ill, or just in need of a hug
shaz x

Hi shaz!:hello:
Hey hunnie - how are you?
I'm sorry to hear about the problems with DS and school angel. However, hang in there sweetie because this situation is one of Tiff's favourite specialities!

My son was very seriously bullied and I successfully fought the battles at every stage. I detest bullying!

Since then I've posted info and Tiffy letters to try and help others whose children are being bullied and who are having problems with the school. You're left feeling truly desperate. I hope I've really been able to help some people hun. There are so many rights that they don't tell you about shaz. I'm sorry I haven't got time to go into now hun, but if you'd like me to, I'd be more than willing to post some suggestions later. It'd be great if you could post details of the kind of bullying, when and where it happens, who by, if it's just in school, what the school have done and said and DS's & bullies ages.

If you haven't done so already angel, from now on write down date, time and name of every person you speak to by phone or in person and what they say. Documenting this will give you invaluable fallback should you need it. We've all been through the 'I didn't say that!' or being unable to remember names or dates of conversations. Keeping notes enables you to turn round and say 'Oh yes you did!' - sorry, but it is panto season!

Just try and relax as much as you can and start your written record angel. If it's any reassurance to you now hun, the school has a legal obligation and duty of care for your son's welfare and they are required by law to look after him. You don't get rid of the victim, you get rid
of the bullies!
Oooo - they've done it now! I'm a truly ticked-off Tiff - now Tiffy wants to play!


Here are some links you might want to read in the mean time shaz...

http://www.childline.org.uk/Bullying.asp

http://www.bullying.co.uk/

http://www.dfes.gov.uk/bullying/

http://news.bbc.co.uk/cbbcnews/hi/specials/bullying/default.stm

If I'm butting-in hun, feel free to smack my muzzle.
Try and have a nice chill out day with just you and DS angel - take a breather before your next round; it's best to get all the info available before you go for their jugular!
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

shazrobo

thankyou tiff, i shall look at those links in just a min.
my son is the sweetest boy ever, and no i'm not a big headed mum, its what everyone who comes into contact with him tells me. He is 12 years old, and because he has a statement, he attends a "special" school, where he can be in smaller class sizes, therefore getting the support he needs. the school are always ringing me, to tell me what a good day he has had, how he always gets top marks, how helpful he is, he loves praise and will do anything to please.
however, its not really a school as such, but a pupil referal unit, where children excluded from mainstream can go, til their exclusion ends, then they go back to mainstream. my son is there full time, as per his statement.
and this is where the probs are coming in, the naughty kids who have been in trouble in mainstream, are coming in, calling josh names at first, teacher's pet etc, and because he has kept quiet in front of these boys they have tried harder to get a reaction from him, saying truly awful things, and physically hurting him, the boys in question are also 12. this has been going on for a while, but was unaware, as son kept it to himself, but now i understand why he has become so moody.
spoke to his taxi driver also, and he confirmed that josh had been asking to sit in car a while, cos he was too scared to go into playground with other lads.
anyway, joshua was trying to ignore the bullies yesterday, but they cut his legs, in woodwork class, and in a hurry to get away from them, he accidently pushed past a teacher.
And now the said teacher is accusing joshua of assault, maybe pushing is assault, not sure of law, but it wasnt deliberate, anyway josh got sent home while they investigate things further.
wow, long post, sorry.
shaz x

Stephb1986_2

Hi all im feeling really really down today me and my fella are on the verge of breaking up apart from him saying i need to lose a few pounds we've not been right for a few weeks now. I can honestly say i love him so much i would do anything. We're having a chat tonight to see if we should carry on this relationship. I wanted this christmas to be special and now it looks like its going down the pan. ive not stopped crying for about 3 days now

Stephb xx

hayley11

shazrobo wrote: »

thankyou tiff, i shall look at those links in just a min.
my son is the sweetest boy ever, and no i'm not a big headed mum, its what everyone who comes into contact with him tells me. He is 12 years old, and because he has a statement, he attends a "special" school, where he can be in smaller class sizes, therefore getting the support he needs. the school are always ringing me, to tell me what a good day he has had, how he always gets top marks, how helpful he is, he loves praise and will do anything to please.
however, its not really a school as such, but a pupil referal unit, where children excluded from mainstream can go, til their exclusion ends, then they go back to mainstream. my son is there full time, as per his statement.
and this is where the probs are coming in, the naughty kids who have been in trouble in mainstream, are coming in, calling josh names at first, teacher's pet etc, and because he has kept quiet in front of these boys they have tried harder to get a reaction from him, saying truly awful things, and physically hurting him, the boys in question are also 12. this has been going on for a while, but was unaware, as son kept it to himself, but now i understand why he has become so moody.
spoke to his taxi driver also, and he confirmed that josh had been asking to sit in car a while, cos he was too scared to go into playground with other lads.
anyway, joshua was trying to ignore the bullies yesterday, but they cut his legs, in woodwork class, and in a hurry to get away from them, he accidently pushed past a teacher.
And now the said teacher is accusing joshua of assault, maybe pushing is assault, not sure of law, but it wasnt deliberate, anyway josh got sent home while they investigate things further.
wow, long post, sorry.
shaz x

Hi Shaz

Sorry your son is having a hard time at school, I hate bullying too and it's awful how they get away with it. Hopefully because he's at the "special" school they will understand his needs more than a mainstream school and wont just turn their back on him. It's their duty to investigate the bullying and it's probably good for your son that he's away from them for a while. I understand what you mean when you say you wont get a break if he is schooled at home though. My nephew is 11 and is registered disabled and also has learning difficulties and he didn't go to school for months and it was so hard on my mum (she has custody of him) but she has now got him into a special boarding school and although it took her a while and a lot of fighting with the authorities, it's the best thing that has ever happened to him. He was so against it at first and now he loves it. I'm not saying this would be suitable for your son because I don't know the situation but the education authorities should help you if you are struggling. Sorry if i'm waffling on, my heads fuzzy today!

I hope it all gets sorted for you hun, big hugs xx

hayley11

How is everybody doing today? Hope you're all wrapped up nice and warm if you have to go outside!!

I'm sleepy today, still finding it so hard to get to sleep, been having awful dreams and I get worried at night, don't know why really. I was up early today though and I've got dressed, made my OH some dinner, put some washing on, tidied the kitchen and now I am sat watching Come Dine With Me. So i've done much better than yesterday.

I haven't been out on my own for about two weeks now, which is so bad, I just can't muster up the motivation to do it. I quit my job on Monday, they sent me a letter to say they wanted me to have a formal disciplinary and you can tell by the tone of the letter they were going to fire me, they listed about 10 things i'd done wrong and called it gross misconduct. So I thought i'd beat them them to it and just quit. I've applied for incapacity benefit so hopefully get that sorted in a couple of weeks.

I better go and make something to eat because I haven't had anything yet and I'm feeling a bit queasy now.

Big hugs to you all, take care

Hayley xx

slowlyfading

I have had the strangest evening/morning EVER. Last night, I was texting a girl off my course, who is in my dissertation seminar group. She comes across as really confident and really successful. Anyway, I just text her to see how she was as she's been finding things a little stressful and she replied 'well, I haven't had the urge to self harm today, so i guess that's something!' I was immediately thrown. I text her back asking if she was on campus or could meet me somewhere but she couldn't last night so she came round this morning. We talked about a lot of things, and she's EXACTLY the same as me in lots of ways; the confidence act she puts on is just a front most of the time. We talked about self harming - she uses scissors and she showed me the cuts on her wrist. It was really bizarre today, but I feel really relieved in a way because I know it wasn't me who was feeling this way, but now I know someone that is. I'm glad in a way that she was able to tell me that, because otherwise we would have known about each other and so it means we both have someone to talk to know.
((HUGS)) to all who want/need them.
sf xx

cat_saving_expert

Hi, this is my first post in here, I was wondering how long it can take to see a counselor for depression.
I went to the doctors in July after spending 3-4 months with constant depression that I couldn't shake, Dr referred me after I refused antidepressants and I saw the 'in house' counselor at the end of August. She was very nice and we talked about various things, I filled in a questionnaire and she diagnosed me with depression & anxiety, she felt I should be referred to a more specialist counselor. I got sent a form a week later which I filled in and posted straight away and I have waited and waited for my appointment, 3 months later I have heard nothing, is this normal?

shazrobo

hayley11 wrote: »

Hi Shaz

Sorry your son is having a hard time at school, I hate bullying too and it's awful how they get away with it. Hopefully because he's at the "special" school they will understand his needs more than a mainstream school and wont just turn their back on him. It's their duty to investigate the bullying and it's probably good for your son that he's away from them for a while. I understand what you mean when you say you wont get a break if he is schooled at home though. My nephew is 11 and is registered disabled and also has learning difficulties and he didn't go to school for months and it was so hard on my mum (she has custody of him) but she has now got him into a special boarding school and although it took her a while and a lot of fighting with the authorities, it's the best thing that has ever happened to him. He was so against it at first and now he loves it. I'm not saying this would be suitable for your son because I don't know the situation but the education authorities should help you if you are struggling. Sorry if i'm waffling on, my heads fuzzy today!

I hope it all gets sorted for you hun, big hugs xx

my other son, who is also 12,(twins) had a lot of time at home from primary and juniors, and was a real struggle, but he had severe behaviour probs too, and he is now in a resedential special school, and is so settled and happy, calm etc, its done him the world of good. its a pity they are twins or they could have both gone there, but they didnt want them in the same class, so daniel got a place, and joshua ended up at the pupil referral unit. going into speak to the deputy head tommorrow, as they have said josh can go back, but i'm keeping him away til this issue is resolved.

sorry to hear that you are still having problems sleeping, hope this is resolved soon.
big hugs
shaz x

Tulip

:hello: Everyone,

Hope you are all ok I am fine Went to college and made a christmas card and I am also making an angel on a blank CD and marking it in lead paint and then I am going to glass paint it as it will be a christmas decoration for my christmas tree I left college half an hour early today as my church had a mens choir called the Gospelaires,they come every year and I enjoy this and we have a nice afternoon and sing carols,I had a cup of tea and a Mincepie after that and then I went home


tonight I am going to relax and enjoy my evening


*hugs* to those that need one


love and light,

Katie xxx

Tulip

Stephb1986 wrote: »

Hi all im feeling really really down today me and my fella are on the verge of breaking up apart from him saying i need to lose a few pounds we've not been right for a few weeks now. I can honestly say i love him so much i would do anything. We're having a chat tonight to see if we should carry on this relationship. I wanted this christmas to be special and now it looks like its going down the pan. ive not stopped crying for about 3 days now

Stephb xx

Hi Stephb,

I am sorry to hear of this *hugs* I hope the chat will help tonight,I hope your christmas will be special though.We are all here if you need support


*hugs*

Katie xxx