Depression Support Thread

hayley11

johnroberts07 wrote: »

I moved in march and moved to a different council,( i get I.B and D.L.A. I have schitzophrenia and severe clinical depression) I was getting full housing benefit and council tax. and when i moved into the flat i am in now this council told me at first i was on full benefits, then after about 3 months the housing association told me i was in debt with my rent. I phoned the housing benefit office and they told me i had to pay money towards rent and council tax, and wanted the money i owed them. So now i am having to pay the debt back to them for C TAX and to the housing !!! for rent. Then 2 months ago i got a bill from my old council saying i owe £1,700 rent and £470 council tax, i was living there 11 months. I sent them an offer of paying £5 a week off the debt and they said it wasnt enough. I went to M.I.N.D for help and they said leave it with them and they would sort it out, they didnt and the council went to court and got an order out aganst me, So i just couldnt cope anymore and took an overdose on 27th october. while i was in hospital someone from M.I.N.D came to see me and said they would help me again. Nobody got in touch and i cant get through to them on the phone. Now today i got a letter from a bailiff dated 25th october saying tey are coming to remove goods to pay the bill! I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO

Hi john

Welcome to the board, everybody here is so helpful and supportive, so just remember if you need somebody to chat to or just want to get something off your chest, we're always here.

With regards to the baliff's, I can't really help but have you tried ringing the samaritans or C.A.B? I'd keep ringing M.I.N.D until they help you, I know you shouldn't have to chase them but sometimes people need a kick up the bum :mad: Also I would visit your doctor and they might be able to get in touch with M.I.N.D for you.

Have you posted on the debt free wannabe board? There are lots of clever people over there that know about this kind of thing.

Hope everything works out hun, keep us posted xx

hayley11

dawnylou wrote: »

Hayley that's what I was like, my Fiance laughs at me because I write sooooo many lists. I can't help myself! But lately I couldn't do even half the stuff I wanted to and then I was left feeling lazy and guilty for not having done them!

Anyway I have started to get a headache again and feel tired again - but it has cheered me up somewhat to think that I may have motivated you! That is such an achievement for me - someone who can't motivate herself! lol

The shopping just came, but will wait til Fiance gets home and we can put it away together

Yeah you did motivate me, I was just lay on the bed doing nothing useful and I've now put one lot of washing in and tidied the bedroom a little bit. I was going to meet my OH but I wimped out I will try again tomorrow.

Hope your headache passes soon hun

Tiff_2

Hi betterlatethannever! :hello:
I'm hoping you live by your name, angel. I hope you're feeling welcome and thanks for joining us. Apologies for my late input hun and also in case I repeat something that's already been said by the guardian angels here. I've grouped your posts together so you won't have multiple Tiff posts clogging your screen. Let's have a look-see...

quote=bltn
Hello,
not new to MSE but never realised this forum was here (wish i had)
I've had one of those lives that you only read about, what can go wrong does! but i've coped with it all really well...until now!
In august i went Bankrupt and its been the most hellish thing ever. I feel a total failure, completly useless and a waste of space.
I went sick from work three months ago with a shoulder problem, but the depression has now overtaken that.
I finally got the guts up to see my doc two weeks ago and she was lovely. I bawled my eyes out for over half an hour and she sat and held my hand and passed me tissues.
Ok hun, the first thing that strikes me is that you have a group of problems here and we need to simplify by separating them. One step at a time angel. So, if I've got it right - & shout if I haven't! - the following points are the important issues:
- bankruptcy
- physical ill health
- depression
- work
- medication

Bankruptcy -
I imagine you've been stretched in every direction, emotionally and financially hun. I'm sure you've already gotten all the advice you needed for this, but have you been over to the Debt Free Wanabee board, bltn? You'll find a good many people there who have had the same experience and they can have good resource ideas for these situations. Other places of assistance are CAB and even your local mental health advocate. Also, on this forum, we've got the MSE benefits checker.

Please listen angel and hear what I'm saying - you are not a failure or a waste of space. It doesn't matter how this has happened now hun, the most important thing is to get you on your feet again. You're not the first and you won't be the last. I know it's a tough thing to go through & you'll feel judged by others, but you hold your head up hun because you are dealing with your problems and not running away from them! Time is still very new angel and I'm sure your emotions are raw, so to heck with what others may - or may not - be thinking of you, you are working towards your own fresh start, and you should feel very proud of that!

Physical ill health -
quote=bltn
Hello, not been on for a couple of weeks, been trying to get myself together (not worked, one step forward and ten back)
I wondered if anyone had any advice about the dry mouth you get with the Anti-d's.
Its driving me mad, my breathe smells:eek: and i keep getting little sores or ulcers. I'm drinking constantly (and that has an effect elsewhere:o which makes leaving the house difficult)

Working in the care sector, your shoulder injury is an important consideration bltn. Do not be bullied or intimidated into going back to work before you're well enough to, hun - temp agencies are renowned for their cold approach to people going sick. You have genuine physical and mental ill health problems and their attitude is only going to make you poorlier. You need to look after your physical health just as much as your mental health. You should mention the sores etc. to your gp, even though they're likely to be temporary. Meanwhile, try the old favourite of gargling with warm salty water - though don't swallow it!

Depression -
I'm sorry things have been so hard for you bltn hun, and I imagine the bankruptcy was the final straw. But you are still coping, even though it may not feel like it. You bravely took the step of going to your gp & being completely honest with her, (which is the only way we should do it!), was exactly the right thing to do angel.And another thing which pleased me is the fact that you seem to have a compassionate gp. You're in good company here hun, because so many of us can identify with having that sort of life.If I go out and something happens - dropping money etc. - I always say. ''Sorry - I'm having one of those lives!'' People take it as the funny comment I intend them to, to cover my error. But in reality, it's not funny at all.
Keep communicating with your gp hun - they are a gateway to a lot of help.


Medication -
You're making perfect sense hunnie. I wish I could give you black and white answers angel, but I can't - we've all got our own individual body chemistry and issues. Nothing ALWAYS works for everyone bltn.
Try and focus on the positive fact that this ad seems to have made some kind of differences for you. Drs generally start someone on the minimum doses in case of reactions and so they can monitor you. So, you're probably on the lowest dose and if that is already making a difference hun, then that's great! Time is still very new yet angel, so be patient. If there's something I've learned bltn, it's that I'm grateful to find meds that will make me feel better, rather than getting myself into a tizzy over when I'll be well, iykwim. It takes as long as it takes hun. And yes, stress can affect your recovery so it's important to keep your gp in the loop hun so that she can help with that. If necessary, your gp will make any changes to your ad's but as I said, time's still new hun.

Work -
=quote bltn
Hi Gemini and thanks for your very helpful reply.=quote
! Yay gem!

Do you work for an agency bltn? You can't go back to work moving clients etc with such an injury. I don't know how long you've worked for this company or what your status is with them is, (temp or permanent?) , but regardless, a few words with CAB can advise you of any rights, including any benefits you may be entitled to. Their website addy is www.adviceguide.org.uk
You may also want to consult your union rep, if you have one. Regardless, they should not be hounding you while you are off ill, covered by a dr's note - for whatever reason!
Time for a Tiffy letter methinks! Ahem.....




Dear Loincloth, (PLEASE REMEMBER TO DELETE THIS & PUT YOUR BOSS'S NAME IN HERE INSTEAD HUN!!!) _pale_

I am writing to formally notify you that my doctor has advised me that I am not well enough to work at the moment. I thought it only fair and courteous to keep you fully informed of my health situation.

As is required, I have provided the sickness certificates to cover my absence. I have been told that my injury is severe enough to prevent me from working at the moment. I'm sure you'll agree that Health and Safety is crucial, and it would be breaking the law to endanger the health of my clients due to working with this injury as it is now. I know the last thing either you or I would want to risk, is their health or, indeed, mine. (because I'd sue your !!!-ets off! - DELETE!!!)
I'm fully aware of how pressed you are over staffing issues at the moment, and honestly, there's nothing I'd like more myself than to be well enough to return to work. My current sickness certificate covers me from (...date...) until (...date...). Unfortunately until then, I am unable to work in any capacity.


I will contact you and advise you of my state of health as soon as possible, after my next doctor's appointment on (...date...). If there's any improvement before then, I will phone you. I'd prefer to telephone you to keep you informed as I'm in a lot of pain and resting, as my doctor has instructed, due to the pain relief medication that I've been prescribed.

I realise that this period of ill health is really inconvenient, but it was not something I could foresee or avoid. Please be reassured, you bunion (BOSS'S NAME! - DELETE!!!), that I will notify you of my ability to return to work at the earliest opportunity. Many thanks for your time and understanding.(well, what little you've shown me! - PLEASE DELETE!!!)

Yours sincerely,
Someone too ill to work, you thicky! (DELETE!!!)




And that, my dear, is a Tiffy letter!
Please feel free to use any, all or none of it, bltn. I hope it hasn't caused offence hun - it's just that I get really tiffed-off when someone is being bullied. Stressing you out is not going to get you back to work any quicker! If you can, get someone to hand-deliver it...we all know how things like this get 'lost in the post'!
Keep us posted bltn. I hope something here has helped angel.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

fantastico_2

Im going to put some codes on the competions thread for the http://www.coca-cola.co.uk/whitechristmas 2 win alovely break away. I wanted to give everyone on here a chance first. So please goto:


http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?p=6729571&posted=1#post6729571


I will edit post when they have gone to avoid frustration.

Luv H

Tiff_2

johnroberts07 wrote: »

I moved in march and moved to a different council,( i get I.B and D.L.A. I have schitzophrenia and severe clinical depression) I was getting full housing benefit and council tax. and when i moved into the flat i am in now this council told me at first i was on full benefits, then after about 3 months the housing association told me i was in debt with my rent. I phoned the housing benefit office and they told me i had to pay money towards rent and council tax, and wanted the money i owed them. So now i am having to pay the debt back to them for C TAX and to the housing !!! for rent. Then 2 months ago i got a bill from my old council saying i owe £1,700 rent and £470 council tax, i was living there 11 months. I sent them an offer of paying £5 a week off the debt and they said it wasnt enough. I went to M.I.N.D for help and they said leave it with them and they would sort it out, they didnt and the council went to court and got an order out aganst me, So i just couldnt cope anymore and took an overdose on 27th october. while i was in hospital someone from M.I.N.D came to see me and said they would help me again. Nobody got in touch and i cant get through to them on the phone. Now today i got a letter from a bailiff dated 25th october saying tey are coming to remove goods to pay the bill! I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO

Hi john!
Hold on angel, I'm just writing a reply to you. I'll be as quick as I can.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

fantastico_2

John, Just hold tight luv. You have done the right thing by posting on here, so many people will be here for you and do their best to support you.

Luv H

Tiff_2

john!
Thanks for posting john - let's have a look at this hun...

quote=johnroberts07;
I moved in march and moved to a different council,( i get I.B and D.L.A. I have schitzophrenia and severe clinical depression) I was getting full housing benefit and council tax. and when i moved into the flat i am in now this council told me at first i was on full benefits, then after about 3 months the housing association told me i was in debt with my rent. I phoned the housing benefit office and they told me i had to pay money towards rent and council tax, and wanted the money i owed them. So now i am having to pay the debt back to them for C TAX and to the housing !!! for rent. Then 2 months ago i got a bill from my old council saying i owe £1,700 rent and £470 council tax, i was living there 11 months. I sent them an offer of paying £5 a week off the debt and they said it wasnt enough. I went to M.I.N.D for help and they said leave it with them and they would sort it out, they didnt and the council went to court and got an order out aganst me, So i just couldnt cope anymore and took an overdose on 27th october. while i was in hospital someone from M.I.N.D came to see me and said they would help me again. Nobody got in touch and i cant get through to them on the phone. Now today i got a letter from a bailiff dated 25th october saying tey are coming to remove goods to pay the bill! I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO /quote

I'm really proud of you for reaching out for help john - I know how hard it must have been.

Ok, first hun - this is down to bad communication and are practical problems. These things can be resolved! Nothing is worth taking your life over john.
To be able to really make some suggestions hun, I need to ask a few questions ok?
What rate of DLA do you get? Do you get both care and mobility?
Have you got a CPN or a social worker?
Is your psychiatrist or gp aware of any of this hunnie?
Does the letter say when the bailiffs are coming john?
Hopefully this next part will help to reassure you john.


- First thing tomorrow, make an appointment to see both CAB and MIND. Be sure to tell them it is very urgent.
Do you have a relative or friend who can go with you to support you?

- Next, call social services adult team, your cpn and your psychiatrist. Tell them you have an urgent problem and need help john. Read or show them your post.


- Call the number on the bailiff's letter and explain that you were in hospital and that you have involved agencies to help sort out the errors made. Tell them that CAB and MIND are handling the issue and that they should contact them and not yourself.


- Call both the councils and tell them the same thing. Make sure you write down the date, time and names of the people you speak to and briefly what they say. This will help to keep things clear.


-CAB can contact your debtors and negotiate with them on your behalf and tbh, they'll be lucky to get £1 a week! They will help you to work out a budget too and check to see if you're entitled to any other benefits. They can represent you.


- Print off a few copies of your post john and take them with you when you go to CAB and to MIND. It will make explaining easier for you. It may also be a good idea to send a copy to your psychiatrist as they can have a lot of influence in supporting people.


As I understand it, and I'm not a professional angel so you'll need to check with the people I suggest...
- They cannot include your DLA as income when working out housing and tax benefits.

- They cannot make you pay off any debt at more than you can afford.

- I don't think bailiffs can enter a property unless you open a door - or a window! Make sure your door's locked and your windows are shut just in case. Don't answer the door if they visit and don't be frightened hun. Hopefully they won't come anyway once you've phoned them and explained that they need to contact CAB and MIND first about it.

- I would have thought that you'd be entitled to full housing and tax benefits john, unless you have a large amount of savings.

Ok hun, that's all I can tell you right now. Try these steps first thing tomorrow and post back here when you can, to let us know how you are getting on.
I know it's hard angel, but try not to worry or panic anymore - these situations can be worked out and you can get the support you should have had in the first place. Rest and relax as best as you can now john - you've done all you can for tonight. Take care hun and you know where we are if you need us.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

johnroberts07

Tiff wrote: »

john!
Thanks for posting john - let's have a look at this hun...

quote=johnroberts07;
I moved in march and moved to a different council,( i get I.B and D.L.A. I have schitzophrenia and severe clinical depression) I was getting full housing benefit and council tax. and when i moved into the flat i am in now this council told me at first i was on full benefits, then after about 3 months the housing association told me i was in debt with my rent. I phoned the housing benefit office and they told me i had to pay money towards rent and council tax, and wanted the money i owed them. So now i am having to pay the debt back to them for C TAX and to the housing !!! for rent. Then 2 months ago i got a bill from my old council saying i owe £1,700 rent and £470 council tax, i was living there 11 months. I sent them an offer of paying £5 a week off the debt and they said it wasnt enough. I went to M.I.N.D for help and they said leave it with them and they would sort it out, they didnt and the council went to court and got an order out aganst me, So i just couldnt cope anymore and took an overdose on 27th october. while i was in hospital someone from M.I.N.D came to see me and said they would help me again. Nobody got in touch and i cant get through to them on the phone. Now today i got a letter from a bailiff dated 25th october saying tey are coming to remove goods to pay the bill! I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO /quote

I'm really proud of you for reaching out for help john - I know how hard it must have been.

Ok, first hun - this is down to bad communication and are practical problems. These things can be resolved! Nothing is worth taking your life over john.
To be able to really make some suggestions hun, I need to ask a few questions ok?
What rate of DLA do you get? Do you get both care and mobility?
Have you got a CPN or a social worker?
Is your psychiatrist or gp aware of any of this hunnie?
Does the letter say when the bailiffs are coming john?
Hopefully this next part will help to reassure you john.


- First thing tomorrow, make an appointment to see both CAB and MIND. Be sure to tell them it is very urgent.
Do you have a relative or friend who can go with you to support you?

- Next, call social services adult team, your cpn and your psychiatrist. Tell them you have an urgent problem and need help john. Read or show them your post.


- Call the number on the bailiff's letter and explain that you were in hospital and that you have involved agencies to help sort out the errors made. Tell them that CAB and MIND are handling the issue and that they should contact them and not yourself.


- Call both the councils and tell them the same thing. Make sure you write down the date, time and names of the people you speak to and briefly what they say. This will help to keep things clear.


-CAB can contact your debtors and negotiate with them on your behalf and tbh, they'll be lucky to get £1 a week! They will help you to work out a budget too and check to see if you're entitled to any other benefits. They can represent you.


- Print off a few copies of your post john and take them with you when you go to CAB and to MIND. It will make explaining easier for you. It may also be a good idea to send a copy to your psychiatrist as they can have a lot of influence in supporting people.


As I understand it, and I'm not a professional angel so you'll need to check with the people I suggest...
- They cannot include your DLA as income when working out housing and tax benefits.

- They cannot make you pay off any debt at more than you can afford.

- I don't think bailiffs can enter a property unless you open a door - or a window! Make sure your door's locked and your windows are shut just in case. Don't answer the door if they visit and don't be frightened hun. Hopefully they won't come anyway once you've phoned them and explained that they need to contact CAB and MIND first about it.

- I would have thought that you'd be entitled to full housing and tax benefits john, unless you have a large amount of savings.

Ok hun, that's all I can tell you right now. Try these steps first thing tomorrow and post back here when you can, to let us know how you are getting on.
I know it's hard angel, but try not to worry or panic anymore - these situations can be worked out and you can get the support you should have had in the first place. Rest and relax as best as you can now john - you've done all you can for tonight. Take care hun and you know where we are if you need us.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

I dont have a CPN and waitingfor appointment for psychiatrist, i get middle rate care and low rate mobility. Only just got bailiff letter today and its dated 25th oct and says coming in next two weeks!

johnroberts07

my trouble is when i get depressed i sleep a lot and cant motivate myself to get round to doing things, then it all gets worse and worse

meyore

Hi all I'm feeling good today thankfully.

I've been all over excited anyway because tomorrow I'm working a half day then I'm off for 2 weeks!:j I hate my job so much, so a work day is usually a bad day, but today I had the strength to block out the bits I hate. The time off bit no doubt helps.
I'm off to pick up the OH on Wed and I'm so excited because I haven't seen him for 7 weeks :eek: Be nice to spend some time together, I've missed him so much.

Then to make it all even better I was offered a better job, doing something I'm good at somewhere I used to work! I'm going to think about it for a while though as I don't want to rush into anything I might regret.

Hope everyone has had/is having an ok day, just wanted to share :rotfl: