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Depression Support Thread

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  • rose07
    rose07 Posts: 2,442 Forumite
    BigMummaF wrote: »
    Evenin! How's the day been for you all?

    We had fun....me muvva & I had just finished lunch & I was queuing for the tea when the fire alarm went off...& we had to evacuate:eek: I started tittilating my hair & straightening my outfit, ready for the :drool: firemen:drool:[wilt/swoon]:drool:
    :(I didn't get to see any :cry: cuz they went round the back.....hang on...:mad:..WHO TOLD THEM I WOULD BE THERE? ILGD? Dawny? TooooooLIP---was it you? I heard a rumour you did a smartie raid yesterday & they haven't had time to get some more:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
    *
    *
    *
    *
    *
    *
    Rose, I hadn't realised you have had to go through so much pain, & I believe you're not yet 30---not that age has anything to do with it. I'm waffling now, cuz I don't know what I can say to help you, other than I'm not intending to go any where. I would suggest contacting one of the charities that are specifically geared up to help victims of sexual assault, if you haven't already, & see if they can offer you some sort of support.

    OK all....I'm off.....the thought of being almost close to all those hunky men in rubber trousers has done me in!:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
    Peaceful Minds folks. BMFx

    hi mumma

    oooo get you, all those firemen around ya, did they sweep ya off ya feet? ;)

    IM on the smarties right now.....but someone seems to have taken all the blue ones... :rotfl:. come on peeps fess up :p

    No im not yet 30, little young one me :rotfl:, Im 23, but dont feel it or look it :o, I have been through alot, abuse of all kinds, bullying, sexual, violence, verbal you name it ive been through it. And then theres all the other carp, I always seem to be in the wrong place at the wrong time too, i must have a nack for that ;), but the thing is you can either get down or get up, you have to keep fihting coz if you dont its like everyone who ever hurt you, in whatever way, wins, they have managed to destroy you, and break you, and they win, so you gotta not let them win.

    When 'IT' happened (exactly 4 years ago) i kinda did fall apart, guess you would wouldnt ya. One day my tutor found me under a table, hiding shaking, broken, he got on the phone and rang the welfare officer they rang the councelling service and all balls started to roll as it were. I did do a project on what happened, going against all of my tutors advice as by then they all knew what happened, i had to do the project to try and understand it, I found out that only a very small percentage of sexual assault goes to court, mine didnt, so no closure, but the project i did, helped me to look at how it made me feel, and whilst i did the project i went to see a councellor weekly, to help me, and support me, she was amazing, the best councellor i have had, she and the organisation she was part of helped people specifically of sexual assault, and she was soo good, we didnt just talk, we used playdo to show things, sometimes i wouldnt talk, so we used things as i way to show things, we used stones, crayons, furniture, whatever was in the room, we used. was greeat, and kinda fun :D

    ok here i am rambling on

    soz if the above upsets anyone, i should come with a warning :o

    how r u doing? those knees of yours behaving?

    and you are here hun, just to have someone means something ya know, besides everyone needs a bigmumma ;)

    you take care xxx
    BB B*TCH NO 8
    May your dreams come true and set you free :kisses3:
    Tiff A.S.M 10


  • rose07
    rose07 Posts: 2,442 Forumite
    Rose, thanks for replying again. I'm alright, its just all got a bit much lately but I had a meeting with two girls from my dissertation group and they feel exactly the same so I know I'm not by myself. We're going to have regular meetings where we look at we're all doing and read through and make comments about the work - I find that really helpful so hopefully it'll be okay. who knows.
    I hope you're okay too, and getting by alright. I'm here if you need to talk.
    sf xx

    Aww no problem hun

    excuse my ignorance, but are you in your final year now?

    Seemms the last is always the hardest, its good you have people to talk about your dissertation with, i didnt quite have that, but least you know your not alone, and that you can work through it together, remember with dissertaions, its important to have a beginning, to explain what your going to look at, a middle, explaining pros/ cons of what your discusiing, using quotes from people and remembering to note it down, discuss in detail the thing your talking about? and then close with a summary.

    soo whats your dissertation on?

    take care hun xx
    BB B*TCH NO 8
    May your dreams come true and set you free :kisses3:
    Tiff A.S.M 10


  • rose07
    rose07 Posts: 2,442 Forumite
    geminilady wrote: »
    :hello: Hi Rose
    [Geminilady , hi how r u? have you managed to sort things out with your friend yet? Hope you do soon, as we all need a friend xx

    Well we are in contact again i was upset because my texts were ignored for a fourtnight.I was worried he was ill as he has heart probs but apparently he was in the usa for work and said he told me he would have no phone contact while there.He did not tell me at all i may be menapausel but i would have remembered.I will give him the benafit of the doubt as he has mental health problems himself but i think the friendship is not as important to him as it is me.I am struggling at the moment feel nobody cares about me.I know depression can make you feel that way but nobody does really not in the way i need.

    HI GL

    Its good you were in contact again, I hate it when I get ignored, esp if it someoen that means something to you, it can hurt, but i tell ya something rosie here is a bit of an old thing really, i hate texts, all they do is get you worried, if you text someone you worry if they dont reply, you wonder all things in ya head, and before long youve wound yaself up all because of no reply, when it could be something like there busy, nothing like a good old phone call if ya ask me, texts show nothing, just words, to hear someone means more. ;)

    Awww its hard isnt it, people do care about you hun, i know that, but i understand what ya mean, sometimes we all need that special someone that can hug us, hold us and tell us everything will be ok, you will find them hun, I know im a young thing kinda, but i dont ave that special someone, that someone that you look forward to seeing every night, someone to talk to and hold you when it gets tough. Makes me wonder whats wrong with me lol :rotfl:

    keep fighting hun, and you will find someone soon

    xxx
    BB B*TCH NO 8
    May your dreams come true and set you free :kisses3:
    Tiff A.S.M 10


  • rose07
    rose07 Posts: 2,442 Forumite
    hi,
    real quik one as dh is on hols so im off the comp, not ignoring you lot.
    rose....saw your doggy, is gorgious, looks very mischevious and ful of energy!!!

    look after yourselves.god bless.
    love ilgd xx

    Hi ilgd

    how r u doing?

    have you got piccies of your ones? and im sure they wont be annoyed at you for not feeding them once, or if you forget they do remember. MY little one, she didnt get fed last night as there was no food in for her, and eveytime i looked at her she was looking at me saying feed me :rotfl:, gave in in the end and fried her some bacon and gave her some blackcurrant muffin and ham :rotfl:.
    She is very mischievious, knows what she wants and how to get it :), and yes, very energetic, tho atm , i can barely move let alone keep up with her :(

    you take care hun

    xx
    BB B*TCH NO 8
    May your dreams come true and set you free :kisses3:
    Tiff A.S.M 10


  • rose07
    rose07 Posts: 2,442 Forumite
    Tiff wrote: »
    Hi guys!:hello:
    How are we all this a.m.?
    I hope everyone's ok and has a peaceful weekend lined up. I'm going to try to post what I can, when I can, so I'll start with a few Tiffbits.;)



    rosie - it's good to hear from you hun!;) I'm sorry that you've had such a bad time and hope you're on the road to recovery angel. ;) I thought something like that had happened :o, & it's a relief to know you're still here hun. :T A day at a time ok rosie? Take care hun.hug.gif



    Keep fighting guys - I don't want anything happening to my Tifflings!:o ;)
    Keeping you all in my thoughts and wishing you well.hug.gif
    Much Love,
    Tiff xxx

    HI Tiff hun

    How r u? and i want the truth ;)

    Semms your rosie radar was working hun, ;), i seen those pearly gates:eek:, rosie was nearly no more :eek:, but not for long :Dhoping i wil be ok, just gonna do as you say and take one day at a time, but everything hurts :o

    Have to say it hits ya dont it, one day you can be here next you cant, it can only take one thing, f**k, its hitting me, im lucky to be alive. maybe should explain??? what ya think Tiff?

    Ohh something has came to attention, clickety click, seems most of us here are females, just wondered do females get depressed more than males? or maybe females are better at dealing with their emotions, dunno , theres one for ya to think bout? :)

    , k better go now get some rest

    take care everyone

    xx
    BB B*TCH NO 8
    May your dreams come true and set you free :kisses3:
    Tiff A.S.M 10


  • slowlyfading
    slowlyfading Posts: 13,429 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    Rose, for my dissertation I'm looking at film music and whether or not it infulences our perception of events in a film :) and yup, I'm in my final year now :) its gone really fast! :eek: I have no idea what I want to do in life, lol.
    sf xx
    Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
    Personal Finance Blogger + YouTuber / In pursuit of FIRE
  • geminilady
    geminilady Posts: 1,922 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts
    rose07 wrote: »
    geminilady wrote: »
    :hello: Hi Rose

    HI GL

    Its good you were in contact again, I hate it when I get ignored, esp if it someoen that means something to you, it can hurt, but i tell ya something rosie here is a bit of an old thing really, i hate texts, all they do is get you worried, if you text someone you worry if they dont reply, you wonder all things in ya head, and before long youve wound yaself up all because of no reply, when it could be something like there busy, nothing like a good old phone call if ya ask me, texts show nothing, just words, to hear someone means more. ;)

    Awww its hard isnt it, people do care about you hun, i know that, but i understand what ya mean, sometimes we all need that special someone that can hug us, hold us and tell us everything will be ok, you will find them hun, I know im a young thing kinda, but i dont ave that special someone, that someone that you look forward to seeing every night, someone to talk to and hold you when it gets tough. Makes me wonder whats wrong with me lol :rotfl:

    keep fighting hun, and you will find someone soon

    xxx
  • Tulip
    Tulip Posts: 29,324 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    :hello: Everyone,

    I had a good day today,went to my parents as usual for lunch which was lovely :) I am relaxing tonight,ordered a dvd for Dad called Gone with the Wind and it was £3.99 :)

    Rosie,thanks for the link to Leona Lewis's new video Bleeding Love,its a lovely song but the video was frozzen in parts but I got a feel for the song anyway :) She will do well I just know it as she has a great voice :)

    I hope you all have a nice evening :)

    Love and light,

    Katie xxx
  • Tulip
    Tulip Posts: 29,324 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I am off now,

    chat tomorrow :)


    Night! Night!


    love and light,


    Katie xxx
  • Miroslav
    Miroslav Posts: 6,193 Forumite
    1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Tiff wrote: »
    Hi miro!:hello:
    How's you hun?

    Don't ask! :eek: :o Very low, to put it mildly
    Thanks for the lovely catnip miro!sport-smiley-001.gif
    You shouldn't have let me have so quite so much - it's like letting sazzy loose in a smartie factory!WooHoo.gif

    Thought i'd get you high as a kite ;)

    It helped me to cat-ch up on my catnaps though!:rolleyes: wink.gif

    Groan!
    catshades.jpg

    Sexy :eek:



    See hun - no-one's rejected you or preached to you because of what you posted here - you're still our miro.;)
    It would be a huge splash hun - talk about tsunami!laughing-smiley-014.gif
    Don't worry miro - I'll be gentle with you.
    Back to being serious Tiff now...

    Yet! Btw, I can't swim, so don't cause a Tsuanmi....please ;) Saying that, if any of you are up to your neck in water, i'll still be able to see the tops of my wellies - if I owned any that is ;)


    I understand what you mean miro, it affects either sex. It's hard enough to find - and accept - help if you're a female, but it is easier to find for women. Like mental ill health, it's something no-one wants to talk about - one of the final taboos. But the links I posted yesterday show that it is being taken seriously for men too.
    What is nearly as traumatic as any kind of abuse itself, are the things said to us. Quite simply, your stepfather was wrong hun. You can't erase something that has traumatised someone. Be it out of good intentions or through worry, it's the last thing you'd want to hear. If we could just accept a traumatic experience, don't they think we'd have done it by now?!

    What really bothers me about my step father, and I see him maybe 3 times a year, is everytime he says he's seen the person involved, when he has no reason to tell me that. I know he doesn't like me and I know he's doing it to get to me, but then again maybe he's not. After all, he's as dumb as <insert word here>

    I'll probably never get over it, thus never have another relationship again. Why would anyone want someone that can't get close?

    The abuse itself is over though hun and what we're left to deal with, is the fallout from it - which is just as hard, if not harder!
    It's like mental ill health imho hun - we end up tormenting ourselves with our own thoughts. The skills we need are learning to put the basics in place to get through each day, to realise that it takes hard work to recover, that we can't change the past because it's gone.

    I just have to curb my anger as it's other people who get the sharp end of Miro's tongue.

    If we can acknowledge and manage what has happened to us - and that's not agreeing with it! - we can learn to live a better life. We can learn ways with professional help, to try and put the events & the pain where they belong and to manage them, so that we can go on and still live a good life. I have more thoughts on this paragraph hun and might share them another time.;)

    I've tried for many years to live with it. The first few I had a partner who was the best thing ever to happen to me, then when she died, well I died too basically.


    Most primary care trusts have a male health clinic in their area hun. Call the gp & ask the receptionist or even call the local hospital miro. If this isn't available in your area angel, I think you should print off your first post and take it to your favourite gp at the practice. You really did a good job of explaining how you feel about this issue of needing medical help because of the abuse. There's help waiting for you hun and as hard as that is for you to approach, you don't have to be suffering from physical pain. Just think of how much better you'd feel once that was out of the way angel.

    They told me they had no male health clinic, so I have no idea why they would lie to me. Wouldn't be the first time though.

    I don't trust any GP. The last time, he said he'd arrange an appointment for me and that there were only male surgeons, therefore i'd have to make do


    [SIZE=-1][SIZE=-1]You're welcome sweetie.hug.gif[/SIZE][/SIZE]
    Now don't go at anything or everything at full speed miro.
    All the links I posted were for 'if' and/or 'when' you might want to look into them any further. I'm not trying to push you into anything hun. You have to go at your own speed and be ready to do things.
    Speak to your dr angel and ask their opinion too. In my humble opinion, maybe you should make a list of the priorities to deal with and I'd suggest number 1 might be taking care of your physical health issues.
    The longer you leave it them, the bigger that issue will become. Once they are dealt with hun, you'll have a clearer mind to deal with everything else.
    Be aware that it won't be an easy fix for the other issues miro - I'm sure you know that already. It'll take time and no-one can tell you how long that will be. You have to do it step by step miro, or it won't work. But there'll come a day when you'll feel the sunshine and you'll be so glad you did it.;)

    Physical health is probably first, it's just too difficult at the moment. In all honesty, if I curled up and died, it would be one less thing for the world to deal with. After all, that's what everyone makes me feel, i'm just a thing in the way.

    I honestly can't see a day when the sunshine will be bright and I will be happy, it just doesn't happen to some people and i'm one of them sadly.

    Go back and tell them to find out which cupboard he's been locked in then!rolleyes.gif
    This kind of attitude ticks Tiff off!tapping.gif Have they got electricity there yet?! Oops sorry - Tiffy claws retracting.:o
    Hospitals do have access to emergency dentists, as well as being able to refer you to your local hospital's orthodontics dept. or to the nearest hospitals with one. With the new legislation, you can get a choice of where you get treated with a referral, so if they haven't got one, then choose another hospital angel.

    I think I live in a backward place as they insist that there are no dentists there. My local dental centre will only tell me of local dentists too.


    I won't say it, I won't - I'll resist the temptation!wink.gif
    If you can just motivate yourself to make sure you eat properly etc hun, that's a good start. You don't seem to have a problem with your general physique or health, so don't over-stretch yourself.

    My general food intake is good. I don't do smoking, drinking or drugs, looked after myself all my life, yet feel 95 - work that one out! I'm just unlucky health wise and life wise.


    You're welcome hun. Why do you feel pressured angel?

    Because I may not pass the PCA, then I will be forced to grab the 1st job that comes along


    You're not ugly or horrible hun - it's the pain inside us that's horrible and ugly!
    Tiff secret - shhh...I avoid looking in mirrors. I don't like what I see and I can't help but think it should have all been different, that I shouldn't have ended up like this. Your self-esteem is a fragile thing and is usually the first thing to break.

    I feel ugly and horrible, especially when no-one likes me. Everyone tells me i'm polite etc etc, yet women like the opposite it seems. I always meet women who think about material and shallowness. I've honestly met very few women who think of anything more than money, sex, cars, money, sex, money and erm......money. A young lady with a good conversation who wants to take things slow and has morals would be nice. I guess i'm old fashioned. Don't get me wrong, sex is fun (or can be, only my ex who cheated on me made it boring boring boring with her :o ) but not with a girl who's had half of England within the last month. You remember 'S'? She didn't want sex straight away, but she didn't want much to be honest.......oh wait......money, I remember now :rolleyes:

    So, I'm not going to tell you that you look like Justin Timberlake (drool.gifbiggrin.gif), even if you do, because you won't believe me if you can't believe yourself yet. You've only got to look at our little MSE World angel, to see many good people trying to help each other out across all of the boards.
    A good heart doesn't get old or fat or wrinkly hun - and that's what counts.wink.gif

    JT :eek: Britney reject ;) It must be my town or my perception of life. I rarely meet half decent people who don't have motives, which is why I hate the world and the people in it. I think i'm just not right for this world. I've had my chance and it hasn't worked out :o


    Have you been to CAB with fm? If they refuse to help you because of a possible conflict of interest (even if you were dating or not), then they should have advised you that you can get help at the next nearest CAB to you.

    No. She is on their books from the past and it has caused a problem. I shall fight on my own until I need help


    There's probably nothing I can say here to change your mind hun but please think about this viewpoint:
    You're not unloveable hun - you were badly loved!
    This leads to a lot of people's trauma and how they see themselves. The change hasn't happened because you haven't dealt with everything yet, because no-one's told you about what help there is, or helped you to get it!
    Why wouldn't anyone want you? Have you met everyone yet? I know this sounds blase hun, but what you wrote is an example of 'black-and-white thinking' and of 'catastrophising' - which is what we all do when we're hurting.

    Well, apart from 2 years of my life (31 years) there has been no-one. I've become used to it. Had I not had those 2 years, i'd be alright I think, albeit a very cold person.

    The counselling etc has been lacking and I really don't know how to interact with people.

    Why wouldn't people want me? Because of my physical problems, mental problems, lack of money & status and I don't know how to interact with people.

    I don't include the people on this thread as i've never met them, but the ladies I meet are horrible. My standards are quite high after my successful relationship, but surely I don't ask for too much. Surely there are decent ladies somewhere who just want companionship, at least at first?

    You're not a sub-standard human being miro. That couldn't be further from the truth. Never say that please hun! Because angel, every time you or anyone does, it reminds me of how I feel about myself. And it underlines it in your own heart too. The only sub-standard human beings miro, are the people who hurt others enough to bring them to this state!

    I agree with you, but I feel sub-standard. Just for once, i'd like to meet someone who liked me for the person I am and that person got to know me. I don't do the big macho bloke thing. I'm bigger than the rest I don't need to act and because of what happened when younger, I don't usually get on with blokes. My best friends in life have all been female. kay, last year I had a 'relationship' of sorts with 'S', but that was a complete disaster. Yes she said nice things, but maybe she was lying like she did about all of it :o


    A challenge then for us all!
    If you can, take just one day.
    Claim it as your day and do nothing but please yourself, be kind to yourself in your thoughts and dig however deep to find anything that will make you smile.
    That guys, is step 1 to seeing yourself as you really are.:o

    That is nearly impossible right now, the way I feel - I wish I could :o



    You're a compassionate, witty, intelligent miro, who is just waiting to grow into all your potential. The pain is a screen that stops you from seeing all the good things you are. It may take us longer to achieve what we will achieve than it takes others to, but the battles overcoming our issues will make the victory all the sweeter in the end. Be kinder to yourself, miro.hug.gif

    I'm 31, Yesterday it feels I was 18 - life has flown by and time is running out. My efforts in life are never appreciated. Some of us are just born to make others look good.

    Apologies for the length of this guys. Right, now you've got a soggy Tiff - I'm off!wink.gif

    I thought cats didn't like rain :confused:
    Now where did I leave that tin of sardines?!confused.gif :think:

    *Burp* What sardines? :o

    Much Love,
    Tiff xxx

    P.S. - see below... biggrin.gif

    Britney :kisses2: :kisses3: :iloveyou:

    - But I love Justin Timberlake more!!!! dance.gif :happyhear flowers.gif

    Britney reject :eek:
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