What would be fair amount for a 21 year old to pay?

thevilraggydoll

I would say it depends on whether he is with you so that he can save for his own deposit, in which case, you are sacrificing to help him in the future, or whether he staying for convenience.

Decide what you want him to pay and if he really thinks he is better off moving out then let him. It will do him better in the long run to learn to be independent.

Grumpyswife

Mt son has just started his first full time job and is paying £100 a fortnight. He gets all his washing done, does his own ironing, helps round the house (when he remembers!) and his food is paid for, plus he gets lifts to work sometimes. However he doesn't earn £31,000 a year!


If your son objects to a very affordable 'rent' with everything thrown in and doesn't help in the house, then he does earn enough to leave home. He will find it much more expensive and perhaps he will then appreciate what he is so critical of now.


His stuff in bin bags on the doorstep may help him decide!

cazpumpkin

I charge my 2 grown up children a £100 a person. They are both in well paid jobs but thats not relevant to me. My expenses havent changed since they left school and started working so its not about how much money I can squeeze out of them .

Suddenly my husband and I have an extra £200 a month, we didnt ask the kids to be born and have paid the bills ourselves the last 18 years , yes theyre adults and it would be more expensive elsewhere ...but theyre not lodgers, theyre my own flesh and blood and until they want to move on I would always charge them a nominal amount.

At the moment they are aged 18 and 22 years old.

When they get to about 25 we will be increasing it to £150.

That would be each child contributing £100 for food and £50 for fuel which is more than enough . Our other expenses wouldnt alter at all.

Dave101t

wow...... let him move out. kick him out.
I earned the same and paid 300 a month, and bought family food.

you doth spoil the child!

Griffey

Hi, my 20 year old son has paid 20% of his earnings for the past three years. For the first year he paid 10% of his earnings. Unfortunately you may have to call his bluff and tell him that moving out might be the best option. I'm sure what he's paying you isn't half what he would have to pay in the real world. He can come back if that;s what you both decide on. Sometimes you need to be cruel to be kind.

gaily

I came back home for 12 months after being at Uni (and this is 15 years ago). I was on about £10K, My parents charged my £100 monthly for my room, and let me treat the place as I had done up prior to going to Uni - ie Houserules were in effect re a midnight curfew or stay out overnight (I was 21, but more for mum's sanity than really wanting me in), mum or I cooked, my washing got thrown in with everyone elses, and I got as much share of the TV (not satilite in our house in those days) as anyone else. I helped clean / iron, but this was my choice rather than a rule.

I paid for my own car / mobile / clothes and any treats (drinks, food etc) that I wanted.

I moved out after the first 12 months, and can only say that whilst I was fully expecting the change, that any 21 year old at home, who thinks that a £50 increase is hard, try living in the real world where the cooking, cleaning, washing and ironing fairy doesn't exist. If the TV blows up, you have to fix it, or buy a new one, where the unexpected bills come and steal the little bit of spare cash you have.

He's onto a good thing with you, I just don't thinkg he'll realise it until he tries the real world.

As for amounts to charge, you've mentioned you don't want to biase us, I would suggest that as he's earning what both you and your partner earn betwen you, that 1/3 of the share of the household would not be unreasonable, or to actual participate in the running of the household. (My mum did put some of my rent aside to give me the deposit to the flat when I moved out, she just wanted me to have some financial responsibility)

Good Luck.

Loz01

If he earns £31k a year and is only paying you £250 what on earth is he spending the rest of his money on?? Especially if he's saying he can't afford to save for a mortgage! I'd kick him into touch OP, I never would treat my mum like that :eek:

AppleChai

As soon as I was earning at 16 I paid my mum half of everything. It was a slightly different situation, she has never been a high earner and so never had a mortgage. She was on £15,000 a year and rent was £900. In summer holidays I would work 89 hours a week waitressing and so could give her £200 a week. In term time I was earning less but she still got half. I was proud and pleased that I could finally help her out, not moaning that she was taking my money and I couldn't save!

bertiewhite

I'm a bit late to this thread but I am in the same situation with my 19 year old stepson. He earns approx £1000/month working for Tesco and when we first broached the subject of contributing he offered to do a monthly "big shop". It seemed to work but lately it's become apparant that the amount he gets is getting less, it's always what HE wants and as a result his Mum & I end up doing another shop anyway which defeats the object really

His older brother lives away and pays £400/month which includes utilities but not food, toiletries etc. When I first starting working I had to pay my Mum a third of whatever I brought home but I think a set amount would be better because the bills don't change according to what we earn.

So - I had 2 figures in mind, 1 which is a quarter (there are 4 in the house) of just utilities and food (£140) or including the mortgage which would be £300. I am thinking £200 would be a good figure given his wage.

As far as the comments about including mortgage are concerned my view is that we only live in the house we do because of 2 teenage children. The moment they leave home we will downsize and have a smaller mortgage with smaller bills.

stormbreaker

Apologies, I have not read through this lengthy thread! My son is an apprentice and understandably does not earn the earth

He knew from the minute he started full time employment his money was to be split 3 ways, a third to spend, a third to save and a third for digs.

We are very fortunate, he transfers at least £200 every month into our account on receipt of his wages.

I don't know exactly what he earns but I do know he has had a rise in the two years and our digs have gone up without asking.

We are in the fortunate position to invest it in his name without his knowledge. We feel this only fair as we have supported his brother through 5yrs at Uni.