The Trials & Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

Smookle

Lisa, thats fantastic! Keeping everything crossed for you! How are you feeling?

Code, I did a course not long ago talking about ethics and the NHS and the course tutor highlighted this same issue about funding "non essential treatment". The group were really crap about it because they obviously all conceived without issue. I wish I'd said something instead of just keeping quiet and trying not to cry because that whole debate upset me really badly! That was the first time I'd been exposed to the idea that some people think we shouldn't have help, I couldn't believe it! Needless to say, I think i will avoid that thread!

Floaty, I'm doing okay thanks! Week 1 of the 2WW is officially over, just 7 more days to go to test day! Think this going to be one of the longest weeks of my life...not least because I've now got sinusitis and all im allowed to take is paracetamol...!

Smookle

O god, I went into that thread! Some people are truly a**holes!!! :eek: :mad:

pinkteapot

People think that because they don't know enough about it. And that's because infertility is a taboo subject. If I had cancer, I'd tell everyone at work and home why I'm so deeply unhappy. Why I have endless medical appointments and why I'm having mood swings. But I don't. I suffer in silence and put on a happy face because it's just not done to talk about it.

Because it's not talked about, people who haven't been through it simply have no idea what it's like. They don't understand the mental health toll and how prevalent depression is among people affected. They don't understand that it destroys relationships. That it ruins sex lives, not just because of ovulation testing and unromantic timing, but because sex becomes linked with failure in our minds.

Most people have that disappointment for a month or two when they start trying to conceive and their period arrives. They don't understand what it feels like when that goes on for years.

And they can never understand that gaping hole in our lives where a child should be and the emptiness it leaves.

codemonkey

pinkteapot wrote: »

People think that because they don't know enough about it. And that's because infertility is a taboo subject. If I had cancer, I'd tell everyone at work and home why I'm so deeply unhappy. Why I have endless medical appointments and why I'm having mood swings. But I don't. I suffer in silence and put on a happy face because it's just not done to talk about it.

Because it's not talked about, people who haven't been through it simply have no idea what it's like. They don't understand the mental health toll and how prevalent depression is among people affected. They don't understand that it destroys relationships. That it ruins sex lives, not just because of ovulation testing and unromantic timing, but because sex becomes linked with failure in our minds.

Most people have that disappointment for a month or two when they start trying to conceive and their period arrives. They don't understand what it feels like when that goes on for years.

And they can never understand that gaping hole in our lives where a child should be and the emptiness it leaves.

Brilliant post ptp.

skaps

Hi all
I've had a terrible week. Was supposed to take Marvelon on Tuesday but it didn't come with the other ivf meds. So finally after alot of calls it came today but now the hospital said it's too late to take it. So now got to go back to hospital when my next period starts. It's been so difficult getting through to the nurse this week, emailed and called several times and then in the end my husband had to go there.

Hope everyone has had a less stressful week.

Agree with code great post PTP.

tea_lover

PTP, agree with all of that. I also think the totally inaccurate way infertility is portrayed on TV doesn't help. I'm sure we can all think of programmes where infertile couples go from first GP appointment to pg test within a week. Really grinds my gears! Also the way m/c is shown.

Hope everyone's doing ok. I have tonsillitis and am feeling sorry for myself

lauraw82

Just popping in to say fingers crossed Lisa and Smookle, hoping for a positive result for you both, and anyone else I've missed.

Had my scan on Friday, 2 19mm follicles seen so one injection later and we're on for a weekend of babymaking! Except OH has got the lurgy so we haven't managed anything yet. Frustrated isn't the word, I know it's not his fault, but seems we may lose out on one of our 4 chances

Have spent the last couple of days catching up with friends, all of whom have small children, just to rub it in my face even more. Sorry for the moan, it's the first time it's been really hard, and I know you all understand and won't tell me to man up xx

Wonder_Woman

Floaty wrote: »

WW, I'll be starting our first cycle (SP) in January, rather nervous but trying to just enjoy December before really getting prepared come new year. Obv still on vitamins, got a CD ready to go. Do you have any particular things planned to help get ready? Skaps is also cycling at a similar time - starting in December I believe.

Ooh Floaty we're starting short protocol in Jan too - cycle buddies I have been a bit crap at prepping to be honest but now taking Pregnacare conception vitamins, Vitamin D supplements, Omega 6 supplements and intralipids (for immune probs). I'm sure I will rattle when I walk soon with all these tablets!!! Also trying to follow an anti inflammatory diet but failing miserably and having acupuncture despite it not working last time - nothing to lose hey?

Aaw there are def sympathetic bosses out there - we're not telling anyone about this cycle other than my boss as she's arranging all my time off on the sly etc.

I hear you Laura- feel as though some of my friends with children are constantly smug! Do they know about your situation?

Skaps what does the marvelon do? Sorry to be dumb, not heard of that used before. Grrr, so frustrating to be delayed when its not your fault!

lauraw82

They know we are trying WW, one knows more than the others. It's not so much that they are smug parents, more that I'm just feeling a bit down at the mo, now that we're not just trying to so this on our own. I know they would be upset to know I felt like that, so I'll just keep it to myself for now. Feeling better now tho, watching The Holiday, Jude Law always cheers me up:D

skaps

Wonder woman I think it's to shut down the system so that it can start again once I take the hormone injections. I'm never good at remembering the science bits.