The Adventures of a Debt Defying Diva

Emzilla

Doesn't sound selfish at all. I think that's the right decision.

Emz xx

sassychick2014

From what you've said it sounds like you've made the right decision and it's not selfish at all x

in_need_of_direction

Makes sense to me.

RainbowBridgeReturns

Good morning, and thanks for your responses. It feels like the right decision for me. She has a Social Worker and a Social Care person who help her, and monitor her situation very carefully, because the children are all on the "Child Protection Register". She told me that they had strongly advised her not to take her husband back, because he has a long history of abuse, but, despite this, she has succeeded in having the restraining order lifted, and he is now in situ.

I will leave it to the professionals! I don't regret the bibs and bobs that I have done but I certainly would not want their job, especially on an unpaid basis x.

My plan for April is:-

1. Hit 70 kg/11 stone. Nice round numbers. This is approximately 6 lb away.

2. Earn £170.00 through £6.00 a day challenge for new or quality second hand clothes to fill my wardrobe gaps.

3. On next pay day put £100.00 in my emergency fund, £100.00 in my short term savings plan (contributions to a Centre Parcs break in the October holiday) and £50.00 into my mortgage overpayment fund, I am going to graduate to MFW! but stay on this board, as I am now seeing the mortgage as a debt, which I never did before.

My three key items, each day, will revolve around those three goals.

For Today:-

1. Work out plan for £6.00 a day challenge
2. Find out current mortgage balance and overpayment rules
3. Food/Exercise Plan

Porridge, skimmed milk and tsp honey
Beans on toast
2 slices of DH homemade pizza with large salad
Snacks - apple, banana, slice of melon.
Treat - My two glasses of wine for the week.
Drink - Two litres of water/green tea.
Exercise - 45 minute walk/ 5 minutes abdominal exercises.

Today I am grateful, as every other day, for my lovely DH and DS who are both kind, gentle, responsible men.

in_need_of_direction

RBR, I'm in total awe. No mention of chocolate in your treats. I'd take it every time over the wine. Agree with your thinking re the mortgage. If I can't see it as a debt rather than a bill, I won't clear it any earlier. It's also why I'm a dfw rather than mfw.

RainbowBridgeReturns

Now that is where we differ, INOD, it would be wine every time for me, but unfortunately (fortunately?), I only get two glasses a week on this plan, but I am allowed a chocolate treat every day, if I wish, from a specified list!

Three squares of dark, organic, Green and Black, ginger chocolate will be my fat busting, weapon of choice each day this week.

Is that even possible, just to stick to three squares a day, and two glasses of wine a week.... we shall see.

I phoned up our mortgage company, which is Nat West, for information on our mortgage. We had an offset mortgage until March of last year, and we had it down to under £20,000 at one point, but it crept back up again. The temptation to spend led to us moving on to a repayment plan. The scores on the doors are.

Type -5 yr fix at 3.25% - £282.56 per month, end date 08/03/2031.

Amount last year - £46,381.00
Amount outstanding now - £44,336.55
Amount paid off in yr 1 of fix - £2.044.44 or 4.4%

Using the mortgage overpayment calculator, if I pay an extra 20% a month or £56.51, we will save ourselves £9,684.00 and 4 years worth of mortgage payments, which means that £56.51 will be working far harder for me than if I put it into a savings account.

I can make overpayments into the account, directly, at any time, up to 10% of the outstanding balance each year. I am setting up a DD for £56.51, starting next month, which is roughly what I used to give to mum, and I will do some tilly tidies in to it too. I am looking forward to it.

Zoopla advises that properties in our street have gone up 13.98% in the last 5 years, and a very similar house just sold, very quickly, for £207,000.00, so that is good news too!

RainbowBridgeReturns

Well, I fell flat on my face at the first hurdle yesterday. I forgot to inform DH that I was embarking on the mother of all diet and exercise plans on our now well established 'Diva' day.

He emerged, from a trip to Sainsbury's, with a couple of bottles of our favourite red wine, a big bag of their finest crisps, cheeses and bread for lunch .... and banoffee cheese cake, from their patisserie, for afters. I can just feel my artery finally closing reading that lot back.

I am ashamed to say that there is not a lot left this morning, but I think that I may have finally had a true health LBM, she says hopefully. I had this lucid dream, last night, where I was in hospital and God, a consultant, was wagging his finger at me and said that because I was still playing with my health, I would now have to take this mountain of pills, with their associated side affects, and my arteries had passed the point of no return. I woke up in a cold sweat and determined that it was still a warning and not a premonition!

So, I was going to write this weekend off, but I am straight back on the wagon. I want to have my cake and eat it, but I can't so, I just have to grow a pair (maybe not!!) grow up! and make doing the right thing for my health as pleasant as possible, and my default setting.

A sobering weekend ...... We have a £44,336.55 mortgage DEBT to clear and the time for making excuses for reckless health behaviour is over.

Three things for today:-

1. Get the house clean and organised for April.
2. Finalise budgets and banking for April
3. STICK TO EATING PLAN

Poached egg on toast
Avocado and cottage cheese
WW lamb stew and vegetables
Snacks – apple, melon and THREE squares of chocolate.
TTFN x.

in_need_of_direction

It's so scary when that happens. Even scarier a few months later when you have done little to nothing about it. My major recent LBM was directly post surgery when I couldn't feel my legs and realised that if I didn't sort out my attitude towards diabetes, there being no legs could become a reality.

RainbowBridgeReturns

Thanks INOD, if this journey is teaching me anything it is how difficult (but not impossible) it is to make changes that really stick.

Yesterday, I balanced any Karma that I might have lost for refusing to take responsibility for seven people's washing!

DH, DS and I spent the afternoon with dear auntie, doing her garden with her and tidying out her shed. She bought herself a lightweight Flymower, to replace her heavy petrol mower, and DH, while doing the majority of the mowing, showed her how to use it for future occasions, as she wants to be able to do it herself. We also found a good home for the petrol mower too, and dropped it round.

I found a charge card to close, an American Express, Gold card, that I have used for big purchases, like holidays, for the points. I had not budgeted for the points and there was quite a bit there, so I donated them to Cancer Research, which was one of the options, and I felt that it was the right thing to do, in honour of loved ones that I have lost.

The diet was not perfect, auntie had made scones, to die for, with homemade raspberry jam and fresh cream, so I had a little one!

I finished the day doing three cinema audits to get my £6.00 a day challenge off the ground, and made £36.00. It was 9.00 pm before I got home, so I skipped tea and just had some fruit.

Overall, I felt very satisfied with the day!

Today's three things:-

1. Sell some coupons and a DVD on ebay
2. Complete house tidy and ensure washing is all away to start April
3. Body Pump and Body Balance class tonight

Food:-

B/Fast -Porridge and a few brazil nuts
Lunch -Avocado/cottage cheese and tomatoes for lunch
Tea -Lamb stew and vegetables for tea
Snacks - chocolate, melon, banana.

in_need_of_direction

Refusing to do the laundry was def the right thing to do. Social services can only monitor based on what they find. If people keep helping out, it will mask the full extent of the problem