Third Time's a Charm...

EssexHebridean

Popping in, waving. Hope you're doing OK.

kissjenn

Hello there all.

Many thanks for the supporting messages and recipe for fab ginger cake.

This week has had some ups and downs.

Good news

1. The hospital will do radio therapy. Needs to be staged and will start in about a month. This gives my internal wounds time to heal properly as well so a doable timeframe.
2. Received a beautiful gift from a dear friend here to help sooth my skin. A million thank yous.
3. Had dinner with a friend in Edinburgh. Never tried Waggamama before but will definately again...nom nom nom as Moo would say.
4. Have got SB started very slowly on his OU course. Lots of info like timetables is now online but they're not posting these for another week or so. He's opened the first book so that's progress.
5. Court action being raised against the two tenants who've had their two months notice. Arrears now standing at £8k and £8.6k.

Troubling News

1. Had to fight all week to get an appointment with oncologist. Scheduled for next Friday and I've been warned by Maggies I may well have a fight on my hands but I'm not going down without a fight.
2. Cancer has progressed from Stage 2b to 3c. Next and last stage is 4 - it's deemed incurable then so oddly enough I want treatment to stop it now.
3. Caught Consultant Radiologist lying to me. When I pulled her up on it the answer was "we didn't want to upset you in case you didn't know". So full disclosure means we'll tell you what we deem is suitable for you to hear. The difference between "risk of" cancer and "actually you have it" is fundamental...but they think they have the right to withhold it in case I get upset forgetting that someone else has already told me and now all I see is liar, liar, liar. So angry right now but that's good and can be channelled in my favour.
4. Another tenant who pays the rent habitually late and is now over 7 weeks in arrears texted me to say her pilot light has gone out. Had a central heating engineer calling her in 66 minutes and visited at 9am next morning...not good enough. She wants flat redecorated while I'm at it. Her notice to quit will be served by Sheriff Officer in next couple of days. Where do these people get off?
5. MSE is supporting Shelter...the very people who encourage my tenants to stay in flats until the bailiffs appear. Run up arrears, ignore court papers, don't show and force a second court submission, lie down and go bankrupt if they try to recover their money. Poor poor tenant, nasty evil landlord. I'd shut down this pseudo charity down tomorrow if I could, vicious evil barstewards who forget that I'll be jobless and homeless thanks to their malicious and vindictive advice.

Shelter - Rot in Hell. You don't care a toss about the real victims that these scammers destroy. Come and look at my flats and the damage these roaches do...you take them in. Give them your spare room if you care that much...bet you don't!!!

Sorry...that's 3 in the official loop now and Shelters playing games again. And they really do see it as a game. They threaten, stick their b0lls in your face, lie and then when you prove what a liar their client is they slink off with never a by your leave.

Between hospitals and tenants/Shelter I'm sick of lies and the runaround. Turn up, state the truth and negotiate or get the hell out of my way.

Did warn you...my dander is well and truly up.

But folks here are still lovely :T

Sun_Addict

Phew Kissjenn that's shown Shelter in their true light! To be honest I didn't realise. When I worked in estate agents non rent payers were known as "dobbers". I'm just glad there are some silver linings amongst your clouds! Gosh you're one feisty lady! Keep fighting!!

kissjenn

You're one tough cookie yourself.

And as for Shelter, it shocked me too. I thought they helped homeless kids and that was a good thing. Most of what they do here is keep the dobbers in situ while the landlords lose a fortune.

EssexHebridean

On the "full disclosure" thing - can you put in writing exactly what your expectations are on this, and send it to the chairman of your PCT copied in to everyone relevant. Whilst lying to you is unquestionably not acceptable, I can see that it must be quite a tightrope they have to walk, and may well make it far more black and white for them as well as you if expectations are agreed in writing?

Other than that, have a (((hug))), and keep on fighting xx

Greying_Pilgrim

EH you beat me to it.

But if you'd like a gentle ((kissjen)) here's mine. And yes, so yes to keep on fighting.

With you all the way.

Greying

Karmacat

Kissjenn! Imagine many, many deleted !!!!!! words here . How horrendous for you! With the radiologist, you've made it clear you want full disclosure, you've already been told you have cancer, and you caught them lying by omission? Thats appalling, truly. And patronising; its downright wrong, and its also breaking the contract they invited you to make. Disgusting.

Also horrible to hear that they've assessed it as advancing to another stage - bleep, I'd be angry at that as well, no wonder you're hustling for an appointment.

As for the tenants and Shelter ... that sounds awful. I rented out my own place when I went off to do other stuff a couple of times, and I think I just struck lucky with the tenants I picked - but even so, I had bailiffs coming round when I moved back in, wanting me to prove I wasn't my tenant

I really don't like this mentality of tenants good, landlords bad - as you say, its simply impossible that that kind of stereotyping is true. I'm so sorry the tenants you've got are working the system to this extent

I hope that you can manage to sleep after all this, there's such a lot going on for you. Do take care, as much as you can.

kissjenn

EH and GP - I have been pounding this same point since day one. Started the day they told me I had cancer...except the man to break the news was junior in the room and so I had surgeons telling me how they we going to cut me up, reposition my nippples and I'd infect and lose all sensation in my breast.

I genuinely said "Whoa boys lets rewind. Can I assume from this I have cancer?".

I've formally complained about lying, escalated to the consultant oncologist the fact their their junior wouldn't give me a prognosis as the info "wasn't relevant" to me, had all my records released under freedom of information and repeatedly asked for all the data.

They do what they hell they feel like and then hide under the rock of "he said, she said".

This last recurrence was blamed by the medical staff on the fact the tumour had been missed previously. I personally thought that was nonsense so I raised it with the chief of surgery (my surgeon) and said your staff feel that I will be less scared by surgical incompetence as opposed to aggressive disease. I think I've a virulent form of cancer and a competent surgeon...what are your thoughts.

He voted the same way. Said he'd come across this a few times that the medical/oncological staff find it easier to cope with the idea that tumours are missed rather than they grow so perniciously.

I've a rotten cancer (acknowledging none are nice) and a good surgeon. Just a lot of other staff who think patting my hand will make me feel good. I accept that may be the desired route of many but not me...I'm struggling to see how I make it any clearer. How about I take a marker pen up next Friday and write across the front of the file...STOP, THINK, DON'T LIE

I will write another formal letter...and ask for all my most recent records to be released. Who knows, all those hours at a photocopier may make someone think.

KC - Sometimes I wished I drank to calm this down.

Buffythedebtslayer

Hello KJ XX




wow your tenants are awful. And so are Shelter. the hospital.....I suppose they think it is for the best or something.



Edited ato add - as we cross posted, that is DISGUSTING. so they have done this before?


glad your surgeon has a clue. guess he is the most important!

and SA is correct you are one strong woman.


much love XXXXXXX

kissjenn

Hi Buffy.

I genuinely get the shielding aspect and them walking a tightrope. But when I've just been made to perform like a trick pony for the registrar by detailing every stage of my disease while he took notes on a scrap of paper so he could check "my understanding" concluding with the necklace of tumours I now have AND then his boss says I'm "at risk" of recurrence, all I hear now is "you're a liar".

In terms of incompetence...boy doctor examined me and asked why I had scars on my right side when cancer was on the left. As I'd just explained to him bi-lateral therapeutic mammoplasty. Blank look although he'd written it down...means both sides son!! They're testing me and I'm meant to be the forelock tugging patient.

:mad::mad::mad: