The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 13

Hopefuljoy

Thanks to everyone for all your lovely welcomes! I feel very encouraged and supported. I would like to go for the full 17 days AF please Shaggy! Unbelievably I've had an AF Friday! So 1/17 to report.

Best wishes for the weekend!

Hopefuljoy

Sorry, just working out how to highlight in red!

Honey_Bear

shaggydoo wrote: »

Sorry I haven't been around, my niece had an A level nightmare day yesterday

I hope her rethinking her options has proved productive and all is calm and happy again in the wider Doo family.

Redemptionsong wrote: »

Welcome hopefuljoy, and well done everybody and all who got the sunnies, and of course honey bear :T

Thank you! It was difficult last night and I really did want a glass or seven of the old red stuff. I settled for a couple of glasses of a different AF red and realised that they are always going to be too sweet, but it wasn't as bad as the first brand.

Last night was 15/31, (please Shaggy) which if I add on the final six days of July I went AF, means I have now achieved 21 Days AF. This is a huge deal for me personally, as it is the longest I have been AF for over 20 years, in fact 20 years 11 months (plus a few days). I can pinpoint exactly the day alcohol assumed a huge role in my life. Unchartered territory from here on in and rather happy about that.

Fruball

Redemptionsong wrote: »

Welcome hopefuljoy, and well done everybody and all who got the sunnies, and of course honey bear :T

I'm not doing very well, but I am liking how I can be honest on here, and how everyone else is too, and it also highlights back to me certain things I tell myself - like "I've not had wine all week" - reality - I never had wine for 2 nights!!

No updates shaggy, but am still board

(soo glad this isn't a competition )

2 nights in a row is my issue too. I just don't seem to manage it despite my best intentions!

Already poured a glass this evening... it's been a long day!

Enjoy the rest of the weekend everyone :j

Redemptionsong

Fruball, your doing pretty good, better than me so give yourself credit if your doing better than last month. I like you I have best of intentions - it just seems to end there tho! just don't get it, in other areas of life I can be disciplined - if I put my mind to to it, weight, work, home, excersise - whatever else i can be disciplined (not super efficient by any means but at least in control) and now I've actually seen my debt added up, I bet I'll tackle this as best I can and have it sorted as best i can. But when it comes to drinking its like I've a mental block, I can be "disciplined" on work nights etc. but still have a wine or 2! Why?? When I'm being good and A/F I have the old iPod in my lugs for walks, housework, bedtime etc. listening to self help gurus or the like (cant believe ive actually admitted this :embarasse ) to keep me motivated then after a couple of weeks I'll let my guard down, thinking am soo sorted and start to enjoy living a A/F life and getting on with things then for whatever reason (holiday, bad day, tough week at work, stressed - I could go on and on and on) I gradually slip back into the old bad habit!

Didn't mean share that much, sorry folks - verbal (wine) diahorea on a quitting alcohol thread - And the award for the biggest Faux Pas goes to . . . .

Well night folks (walks away, head hung in shame) x x

Honey_Bear

Redemption Song, I'm probably not alone on this thread in recognising what you've just posted. I've also been there, done that, bought the tee shirt and caught the disease. I'm going to tell you a secret - if you want to fail, keep going down the 'self help' road.

There's an excellent book called 59 Seconds by a psychologist called Richard Wiseman that debunks the highly lucrative (ie a licence to print money) self-help business/myth once and for all. In it, he quotes the research into whether the outcome is better if you use 'self help' or straightforward, methodical, proven ways of changing behaviours. I borrowed it from the library earlier this year and it has changed my life completely.

I haven't quoted your post because if you want to delete it tomorrow that's okay and I'll delete this post, although if I do, at some point I'm going to find a way to repost the details about Richard Wiseman's book.

16/31 Getting there - with more than a little help from Professor Wiseman.

Redemptionsong

Awe thank you honey bear, i appriecate you taking the time to reply. I've just downloaded it. It's got good reviews and seems a light hearted humerous read, which I like. Thank you. No, I'm not deleting my post from last night, despite the cringeworthyness and self help confession!! It's time to be honest, with myself more than anyone, and i feel i can do that here, it's what I signed for - after seeing how supportive and welcoming you guys are :T:T

Hope everyone has a great Sunday x x

graemecarter

Redemptionsong wrote: »

Fruball, your doing pretty good, better than me so give yourself credit if your doing better than last month. I like you I have best of intentions - it just seems to end there tho! just don't get it, in other areas of life I can be disciplined - if I put my mind to to it, weight, work, home, excersise - whatever else i can be disciplined (not super efficient by any means but at least in control) and now I've actually seen my debt added up, I bet I'll tackle this as best I can and have it sorted as best i can. But when it comes to drinking its like I've a mental block, I can be "disciplined" on work nights etc. but still have a wine or 2! Why?? When I'm being good and A/F I have the old iPod in my lugs for walks, housework, bedtime etc. listening to self help gurus or the like (cant believe ive actually admitted this :embarasse ) to keep me motivated then after a couple of weeks I'll let my guard down, thinking am soo sorted and start to enjoy living a A/F life and getting on with things then for whatever reason (holiday, bad day, tough week at work, stressed - I could go on and on and on) I gradually slip back into the old bad habit!

Didn't mean share that much, sorry folks - verbal (wine) diahorea on a quitting alcohol thread - And the award for the biggest Faux Pas goes to . . . .
Well night folks (walks away, head hung in shame) x x

Exactly that.
I have a huge blind spot where alcohol is concerned, and whatever I did I wasn't able to get it 'under control'. This baffled me.

Speaking for me here (no-one else), that's how my alcoholism manifests itself in me. I am powerless over it. I would sometimes drink when I didn't want to (though I often wanted to), and I would frequently drink more than I had planned at the outset.

I couldn't manage this alone so got some outside help. There I discovered there are many other people like me. They are successful/functioning in many areas of their lives, but not in their alcohol habits, and this had ramifications for other areas of life.

If you find this thread doesn't go far enough to help you cut down/stop your drinking, by all means look elsewhere as well.
I read this thread AND do other things to help me stay stopped (I was great at stopping drinking, but would only stop for a day or two :rotfl:)

PriceySOS

9 please, Shaggy, ta

gien

Haven't been in for a while and I really don' know how many (if any) AFDs I have to add but I haven't been very good - a few nights of complete over indulgence and then fairly regular 'with dinner' drinking. The children go back to school tomorrow so I must get back on the wagon. I'm going to declare tonight AF, so I think that's 7 I have for definite now.

GC, wise words as ever. I wish it was just alcohol that I was undisciplined about but in most areas I don't have a lot of determination and tend to tootle along not changing much (mind you, there's not much the needs changing).

I will say though that this week I'll not be drinking on a school night.