Any advice on getting a child into their own bed?

fluffnutter

Kayalana99 wrote: »

DS is now 16months old, he is not very developed with his understanding (not sure what word to use really) i.e doesn't relate dada to his dad...or mama to me..although he can phyiscally say them.

I know that your thread is about his sleeping but you obviously find this ^^ significant. I think you're expecting too much. My son is 18 months old, a perfectly happy normal little boy but doesn't say mama or dadda to either of us. That's totally normal at his age and even more so for younger kids.

fluffnutter

maman wrote: »

I'm sure advice given here is well meaning but I think you need to talk to health Visitor/GP as well.

Why? He sounds like a completely normal 16 month old to me.

themull1

My eldest daughter never said a word until she was two, she's in the top sets at school now.

notanewuser

Why are you wanting to get him out of your bed, OP? It's completely natural for children to want to sleep with their parents - we did it for thousands of years. It was only the broom-up-the-ar.se victorians who thought otherwise. Our 3 year old DD sleeps in with us if she needs to. Whatever gets everybody the most sleep is best, I think!!

This thread might give you some hope!!!

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4836776

Note how many posters recommend the OP bringing the toddler into bed with mum and dad.

meritaten

I would say to borrow a camp bed or airbed to put down by his bed for yourself (I wouldn't get into bed with him), and be prepared to spend more than a few uncomfortable nights. he is now used to cuddling up to a warm body and will need 'someone' to help him make the transition.
May I also suggest a couple of hot water bottles (well covered) you can tuck by the side of him, and that you have something like a radio to keep turned down low so he becomes accustomed to not hearing you breathing?

mcja

Loads of fab advice, rather than a hot water bottle, try a hot teddy (microwaveable bear/dog/rabbit!!).

Good luck with the next few weeks.

Xx

notanewuser

meritaten wrote: »

I would say to borrow a camp bed or airbed to put down by his bed for yourself (I wouldn't get into bed with him), and be prepared to spend more than a few uncomfortable nights. he is now used to cuddling up to a warm body and will need 'someone' to help him make the transition.
May I also suggest a couple of hot water bottles (well covered) you can tuck by the side of him, and that you have something like a radio to keep turned down low so he becomes accustomed to not hearing you breathing?

What's wrong with a 16 month old being comforted by the warmth and breathing of a parent?

meritaten

notanewuser wrote: »

What's wrong with a 16 month old being comforted by the warmth and breathing of a parent?

absolutely nothing notanewuser! but, in this case the OP wants the little one to get used to her not being there! she may or may not want to do this straight away - but if her little one is anything like mine was...........the removal of your body warmth or them not hearing you breathing is enough to wake them!

chirpychick

To be honest, my son is just shy of 13 months and he is slightly lagging in his speech but I say they understand far more than we give them credit for!!
I think tone of voice and body language tells them a lot too.
My son sleeps 6.40pm to 6.40am.
I didn't understand completely but i am assuming from what you said he can escape the cot?
If it were me what I would do would be to do away with the cot, let him pick out a toddler bed and make a big fuss about him getting his own big boy bed. Make his room all calming, no tv, make it all clean and tidy (not saying it isn't lol but the atmosphere makes a difference so just stating the obvious) make sure he has his comforts. I would even go as far to put him in new pjs (all the buying can be done second hand or even freecycle if money is tight). I'd give him a bath, and id be saying what a clever big boy he is, going to be sleeping in his new big boy bed and then put him in new pjs, put him in bed, read a story, say night night, give him a kiss, tell him you love him and walk out that door. I'd not ever EVER let him back in your bed.
You may have to go in the room to comfort him shhhhh shhhh whilst stroking hair, do not get in his bed with him (sit on the edge) don't take him out of the bed. If he is on the floor simply put him back in the bed. This might take a few days and it will be heartbreaking but you have to make the decision and stick to it.

notanewuser

chirpychick wrote: »

To be honest, my son is just shy of 13 months and he is slightly lagging in his speech but I say they understand far more than we give them credit for!!
I think tone of voice and body language tells them a lot too.
My son sleeps 6.40pm to 6.40am.
I didn't understand completely but i am assuming from what you said he can escape the cot?
If it were me what I would do would be to do away with the cot, let him pick out a toddler bed and make a big fuss about him getting his own big boy bed. Make his room all calming, no tv, make it all clean and tidy (not saying it isn't lol but the atmosphere makes a difference so just stating the obvious) make sure he has his comforts. I would even go as far to put him in new pjs (all the buying can be done second hand or even freecycle if money is tight). I'd give him a bath, and id be saying what a clever big boy he is, going to be sleeping in his new big boy bed and then put him in new pjs, put him in bed, read a story, say night night, give him a kiss, tell him you love him and walk out that door. I'd not ever EVER let him back in your bed.
You may have to go in the room to comfort him shhhhh shhhh whilst stroking hair, do not get in his bed with him (sit on the edge) don't take him out of the bed. If he is on the floor simply put him back in the bed. This might take a few days and it will be heartbreaking but you have to make the decision and stick to it.

May I ask why? He's a child, not a dog.