Any advice on getting a child into their own bed?

Kayalana99

DS is now 16months old, he is not very developed with his understanding (not sure what word to use really) i.e doesn't relate dada to his dad...or mama to me..although he can phyiscally say them.

That said I feel the only way were going to get him to sleep in his cot is by leaving him to cry himself to sleep, but I just feel cruel as he has no understanding..in my head I know all he wants is to cuddle up with us and doesn't know why he can't...ack.

It happened once, purely accidentdal I'm not sort of person who can just let him cry and cry..we just simply slept through. His blanket and pillow were on the floor and the cot was covered in teeth marks (he tends to cry and bite bars when he wants to come out) but he was asleep at 5/6am.

We used to let him sleep with us, and then move him into his cot, and once he woke up he would scream and repeat...but just lately when we are moving him from bed to cot he is waking up easier and 8/10 doesn't settle in his cot anymore.

I know people can say its my own fault for letting him into bed from stage 1 but even as a baby baby he wouldn't sleep in a moses basket..as soon as you put him down he would just scream and scream no matter how much you rocked him etc etc I was a new mum and it was the only way I could sleep..I have a new DS2 and he is 3months and has never co - slept.

I have thought about sleeping with him to start with in his bed - although I would be willing I don't think his cot bed is built for the weight of an adult..although if people have had success with this one thing I did think of is buying him a toddler bed / stair gate / bed guard and emptying his room out... but obvouisly theirs alot cost involved in that!

LEJC

have you tried giving him a special toy or blanket to sleep with rather than mama or dada.


Sometimes a nightlight or soothing music...we used a mobile that projected patterns onto the ceiling at one stage and also those glow in the dark stars so our son didnt feel so alone

thriftylass

What you could also try is to sleep in his room for a while, close to his bed (might be an uncomfortable sleeping bag affair) and then moving further away and away and then out but leave the door open. Or give him sth from your bed like a pillow case that smells of you with him in his bed.

LEJC

other than that have you tried tiring him out to the point that he's just about to go to sleep before you put him in his own bed....
We suffered very badly with sleep deprivation when our olest was younger so I know how easy it is to just be greatful that you and he are getting any sleep whether thats all together or seperate...but their does come a point when your bed needs to belong to you
Does he sleep at all during the day...if so try and keep him awake during the day so that he becomes naturally more tired at night and want to sleep in his own bed.

Kayalana99

Thing is he already thinks of his cot as a 'bad place'

We've moved his cot into our room to try and settle him last few days but if you just took him into his room he starts to squirm because he knows what your going to do...now the cots not their you can still feel him squirming but once he is down on floor he seems extra happy because what he thought was going to happen didnt...?

I've tried sitting next to the cot but he just won't lie down, just stands their screaming from the moment you even hold him above the cot.

LEJC

Why does he think the cot is bad?
you might even have to go down the route of getting him to choose a new bed or bedding
Are you saying that hes happy to sleep on the floor in his room...if thats the case then at least its a start...just make him comfortable and ensure hes safe and let him sleep there.

tbh...we never had any sucess with a cot and went almost straight to a small bed...our son didnt like the cot bars.....are yours removable that you could put something soft on the floor next to him to stop him hurting if he rolled out?
At 16 months hes probably old enough to sleep in a low bed....and it could be that he acually would benefit from climbing into it himself rather than being lifted over the bars of a cot.

Kayalana99

No he'd be happy on the floor because he'd get up and play with things, I guess he just doesn't like being trapped in one place?

Just trying to get across just how much he hates being in his cot bed.

daisygirlmac

If he's really against the cot, what about a mattress on the floor? My sis was absolutely horrible about being in a cot, screaming, rattling bars, throwing herself at the sides but she was perfectly happy to sleep on a mattress on the floor from about 8 months old. Stick a baby gate on the door so he can't roam about and maybe move noisy toys out of the room?

Kayalana99

daisygirlmac wrote: »

If he's really against the cot, what about a mattress on the floor? My sis was absolutely horrible about being in a cot, screaming, rattling bars, throwing herself at the sides but she was perfectly happy to sleep on a mattress on the floor from about 8 months old. Stick a baby gate on the door so he can't roam about and maybe move noisy toys out of the room?

Thats actually a really good idea... will try that tonight as we have a baby gate downstairs.

Why didn't I think of that in first place come to mind...not saying its going to work 100% but seems like an obvouis thing to try!

Should be easy to get him to sleep if I sleep with him then I could sleep next to him on floor ...see how this goes :-) Thanks !

Mojisola

daisygirlmac wrote: »

If he's really against the cot, what about a mattress on the floor? My sis was absolutely horrible about being in a cot, screaming, rattling bars, throwing herself at the sides but she was perfectly happy to sleep on a mattress on the floor from about 8 months old. Stick a baby gate on the door so he can't roam about and maybe move noisy toys out of the room?

And give him something that you've worn and that smells of you to cuddle - a soft cotton t-shirt or similar.

maman

I'm sure advice given here is well meaning but I think you need to talk to health Visitor/GP as well.