Feelings for my best friend?

iwblue

well I've been through something similar. I had a friend who I had feelings for, and voiced these to them. However they weren't reciprocated, and we remained just that, friends.

Our lives carried on and we both met other people over the years, although nothing that ended up being long term for either of us.

About 8 or so years after I told them about my feelings our friendship seemed to take on a more serious note, and like you many of our friends commented on how we acted with each other. A lot of people who didn't know us very well assumed we were a couple.

The long and short of it is that we are now a couple, and still best friends. Maybe the time when I voiced my feelings wasn't the right time.......right person, wrong time in life.......however, when they voiced theirs to me it was....who knows.

Perhaps now is your time........nothing ventured, nothing gained......if he's so vague about his new gf, it sounds like he has some sort of feelings for you.....what have you got to lose.

If he has a new gf, chances are his life will be starting down a different road and you won't be seeing a lot of him from now on.

If that's the case maybe it'll give you the start you need to create your own path.

Good luck whatever your decision.

LouLou

iwblue wrote: »

Maybe the time when I voiced my feelings wasn't the right time.......right person, wrong time in life.......however, when they voiced theirs to me it was....who knows.

Perhaps now is your time........nothing ventured, nothing gained......if he's so vague about his new gf, it sounds like he has some sort of feelings for you.....what have you got to lose.

I agree with those thoughts very much.

With relationships, we tend to look at the obvious stuff, attractiveness, compatibility.

But it's also down to where we are in our emotional selves (are we getting over someone, do we feel emotionally, even financially stable, for example), our life experiences, what we know about ourselves and what we've learned from others, about who is right for us.

I know when I was late teens/early 20s, I would have had absolutely no clue who was right for me, what my expectations are: because I was young, naïve, and life had yet to teach me some lessons.

Timing and circumstances have a big part to play too in whether there will be a connection, even whether things will last.

onlyroz

Are you sure that you have proper feelings for this man, or are you just a little jealous that his attentions are currently directed elsewhere? If your feelings are genuine then there's no harm in letting him know, but be prepared to get an answer you don't want to hear.

double_mummy

1. get drunk and kiss him
2. make a joke of it
3. ask him "so why did we never get together" whilst talking about SOs or lack of them
4. have you ever wondered what we would have been like together
5. kiss him sober
6. write it down in a letter
7.ask him hypothetically my friend likes her friend but hes just started seeing someone what do you think she should do
8. big romantic gesture

dont do nothing if you really feel that strongly you have to act upon it hes not in a LTR so go for it

Innys1

LouLou wrote: »

Many guys are clueless about picking up signals from women,

I would agree with this but for different reasons. In my experience, it's the complete opposite issue.

Guys often read far too much into a girl's behaviour and think she's interested in him.

By the way, I'm a guy so am just as guilty of this as any other.

joolsybools

Well I am an eternal optimist with romance and relationships and I think you should just go for it! Talk to him!