Oh come on! Stake through the heart. A little sunlight. It's like falling off a log"

Buffythedebtslayer

Hungover.


Desk was successfully delivered, the dogs scared the man away, he literally left it on the step and ran down the path! I hadn't even opened the door!


Money situation is suddenly dire! However before I get out of my tree with it all one credit card has offered me a 13 month bt so will be using that. Also forgot that I had the money saved for the dog grooming so that was handy.


have to log in to my other account and check that.


Edit - other account ok. and it is 8 days till pay day. the dogs look so content laying here next to me.


xxxx

Buffythedebtslayer

Hello Diary readers,


had a scare tonight, doggie two run out into the road 3 times tonight. he hasn't done it in ages. I thought we had cured him.


I was so freaked out the third time I took them back home. Started doing some reading.


http://www.whole-dog-journal.com/issues/13_1/features/Problems-Adopting-Two-Puppies-At-Once_16190-1.html?pg=3


It explains LOADs. dg2 follows dg1's lead but is nervous and easily distracted.


Some of this is kinda BS but


http://www.doglistener.co.uk/choosing/sibling-litter-puppies.shtml


http://www.caninedevelopment.com/Sibling.htm


You get the idea. It was a bad plan!




between mum and I we haven't trained them not really. it is a testament to how smart they are that we don't have more trouble with them.


Once again I am sodding up looking after my animals.
huge guilt and confusion to follow.


poor dg2 I was so frightened. he was too. am going to do more research and see what plan I can come up with.


xx

Buffythedebtslayer

On a separate note, does anyone else ever look at their life and go bloody hell, I have royally !!!!ed it up!


I don't mean this in a please feel sorry for me, I am literally in awe of how many things I can mess up. I am an expert in the art of self sabotage.


amazing.




I ordered another clicker for the dogs, I am going to start walking them separately and training them separately. I MUST spend more time with my pets and less time with the tv and internet.


I joined a non dieting diet group on FB - healthy eating etc, since then I have had a Big Mac, more wine than I could handle and survived today with nutella, pizza and pasta covered in cheese sauce.


oh and chocolate biscuits. Not exactly having the desired affect.


still feel yuck. Almost want to say I am never drinking again but not quite.


XXX

gwen80

Buffythedebtslayer wrote: »

On a separate note, does anyone else ever look at there life and go bloody hell, I have royally !!!!ed it up!


I don't mean this in a please feel sorry for me, I am literally in awe of how many things I can mess up. I am an expert in the art of self sabotage.


amazing.

Yep. I've been thinking exactly that today. I hold onto hope that I can make something positive out of it all, but I must address the self sabotage and lack of organisation. Plus I need to get stronger mentally and emotionally. I start crying all the time about random things and I catastrophise about losing people I care about. Life isn't perfect, but maybe if I can work on these things, life might improve. My Mum tells me 'live for today' - I should try that instead of imagining what tomorrow might look like. I also like the quote in my signature a lot.

The other thing is that people have different ideas of 'success'. My Dad has been very successful in his career, but his personal life? Absolutely disasterous. Do what makes you happy.

in_need_of_direction

Only too often. The trick is though to ask how you'd view someone else in the same circs. Chances are you'd see the progress they make post screw up and applaud them for it. Just wish I was better at that trick

Buffythedebtslayer

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

Only too often. The trick is though to ask how you'd view someone else in the same circs. Chances are you'd see the progress they make post screw up and applaud them for it. Just wish I was better at that trick

I have a terrible headache so this might not make sense, but I think I would feel really sorry for her and wonder why she kept doing the same stupid things. like for example wasting her holiday.

There are some victories but they are small and take a long time. Plus they are stuff other people find really easy.

Any how this is not the place for such discussions been there done that. Slowly, slowly, slowly getting things together is better than not getting them together at all, right?

Spending news

1. had to buy puppy pads for the gps £23 for 100


2. had to buy hamster cage, I wasn't going to but the one I have is missing clips and that means the cage falls apart, I have NO idea where the clips are, have looked and think when I sold some stuff I must have given them away with that, bit annoying to say the least. However I got a small discount and free delivery. I needed to get some stuff for the doggies too so used the free delivery. came to 44.53 (34.50 was the cage!) Yet again being disorganised has cost me money.

3. Amazon one click is lethal 89p a hypnosis thing (next fad!)

4. Ebay - seeds, £1.29, fish food, £3.99, dog clicker £1.83.

5. Desk! forgot that! £29.99

1 is on a cc,
2 is on a cc
3,4 and 5 were paypal.

hmmm.
Guilt spending.

worst thing is I wanted to get some plastic boxes for under the bed. would need 8 - 4.50 each. £36 quid.


need to put the next lot of washing on.


it is already 12. oh dear.

Sun_Addict

Hi Buffy - just catching up. You're not the first and won't be the last person who wishes they could've done things differently! Me too! Hope you have a good day today.

Buffythedebtslayer

We can only go from where we are I suppose. thanks SA, am v glad you are here along with the other lovely posters. And my three real life friends who don't judge.


Must admit these holidays, this week off, well it has been a bit tough. Bloody hate depression, the hard !!!!! part of me wants to say get your !!!! together and get on with it. It almost seems as if my body has it's own brain telling it to feel tried now, nap almost constantly. Without the routine of work I do fall apart.


I emptied the under stairs cupboard.


not my brightest move ever!


best go to and sort it.


I want to live in Jessica Fletcher's House. In Cabot Cove.


will put it on the list


xxx

Buffythedebtslayer

I LOVE Murder, She Wrote!


Sorry it was a good one!




Also in my e mails, I got this as my quote of the day

"Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can."

-- Arthur Ashe,


so I am going to do that.


XXXX

please-let-me-be-lucky

Sounds like a plan Buffy.

Hope you managed to get back out of the understairs cupboard and you aren't stuck there forever more! Xx