Oh come on! Stake through the heart. A little sunlight. It's like falling off a log"

Buffythedebtslayer

Hello,


Thank you for all the lovely wishes for the new year xx You guys make all the difference!


So what have I done towards my goals today - well I had a NSD and I cashed out on my cashback so I can put it towards the CC.


we had guests and the morning was spent getting ready and I was not well! Ok now.
They didn't leave till late in the evening and then my sister skyped.


Must not stay up late tonight. Think that is what is making me ill. the fact that it is almost one is a bit of a problem!


Tomorrow I am either going to see my friend or gut and rebuild my room. or I might do both. Can't believe the holiday is over. Mum will be off on holidays soon. Makes me nervous.


All my bills go out tomorrow so I will know how skint I am this month.


must go to bed!


Night All XXXX

DreamerHelen

Happy New Shiny Diary.... :beer:
I hope you have had a nice refreshing Sleep....

Buffythedebtslayer

Well I had a lovely sleep (thank you Helen) Woke up feeling much better. Then I ate. then I didn't feel so great and as a result slept and whinged my way through the day!


I am in fact highly !!!!ed off house is a mess and this is not good at all. It sounds mental (well it is mental) but I quite often think If I could have one wish it would be for a tidy house. I am obviously feeling like this because I am not well but am going to moan any way! We cleared out the spare room and shoved in a plastic bag were all these important cards and papers and mum had just put them in a box. We can NEVER find anything we need and I buy duplicates of stuff all the time (especially at Christmas).


Rome wasn't built in a day right? Its not important in the grand scheme of things(except it is grrrrrrrr)




Moneysaving stuff


A NSD
most impressively I have a full basket at m and s and ebay but purchased nothing.


I will need to spend tomorrow, guinea pigs need food. poor neglected sods - as in they only have enough for tonight. I also need petrol. There are 5 Fridays in this month. hmmm.


still the last one is payday.


XXX

Shoe_Gal

Happy New Year! And remember to cut yourself some slack this year

Jonesy88

Buffy it isn't mental to wish for things to be tidy. At work it actually stresses me out if my desk is a mess - i feel more organised, calm and in control if everything is away and in it's place! (i'm slightly OCD - I don't like not having round numbers in my bank accounts either!)

Buffythedebtslayer

Shoe_Gal wrote: »

Happy New Year! And remember to cut yourself some slack this year

Cut myself quite a lot last year on the debt front. Simply don't know where the money goes (aside from the vets) But yeah now in a new job with a different attitude I do as a "baseline" generally feel better if that makes sense.


Was thinking about notepads.


How about


A spending one,
An ideas one,
A food one
Christmas/gifts one
things to do one.


ugh, not feeling well.


xx

Buffythedebtslayer

Ok.......felt well enough to eat some vegetable soup and some medicinal After Eights.


Am watching the news, Old men who go to Thailand (I think it is Thailand)


They are retiring to Thailand - sadly for in the main the obvious reasons. Interviewed on bloke who was asked what his family thought of this retirement and he said pass, then looked very upset - he was drunk so the pain was clear in his face.


so sad. I mean how much must you hate your life to want to go to Thailand and drink you life away. And to believe no one cares about you. They are now interviewing a bloke who used to be a bus driver and who now sleeps on the beach, another alcoholic - according to the interviewer.


They showed a group of Scandinavian OAPs who have bought a hotel type thing and have a gym..... good that some people get it right!


I don't suppose they can afford to come home - the English guys. I don't even think the second one realised he was really being interviewed for the news.


When Thoreau said "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them"

he really wasn't kidding. How many years must he have spent driving his bus and being unhappy?


and on that note Restoration Man is on and I love that. More dream fodder!


xxx

Sun_Addict

Good idea about the notepads Buffy - I've got a project book they're great one notebook but with divided sections for each "project". Ideal for list lovers like me! Re the tidy house I get tetchy when my house is untidy so know how you feel.

Buffythedebtslayer

Jonesy88 wrote: »

Buffy it isn't mental to wish for things to be tidy. At work it actually stresses me out if my desk is a mess - i feel more organised, calm and in control if everything is away and in it's place! (i'm slightly OCD - I don't like not having round numbers in my bank accounts either!)

Sorry I totally didn't see this post, hello Jonesy88
I must confess today has been another bust, huge row with mum, was so immature - me not her. bloody house.

Sun_Addict wrote: »

Good idea about the notepads Buffy - I've got a project book they're great one notebook but with divided sections for each "project". Ideal for list lovers like me! Re the tidy house I get tetchy when my house is untidy so know how you feel.

That is it SA. am tetchy frustrated and so being so childish!


have almost sorted the notepads.


so the depression. it always hits on holiday as I have no distractions from how awful I perceive my life to be and I am not doing anything useful. I convince myself that I am useful when at work so that gets me through most days. Plus you can't really just give up and go to bed when at work!! I guess I haven't been well either and when you feel yucky and you can see all that needs to be done and time is ticking by etc.


Of course my life is most certainly not awful and the things that are bothering me could mostly be solved if I was not wrapped up in the miseries.


So am back to the old self help stand by of Acting as if........as if everything is ok, as if tomorrow I will get up, move furniture and clean the piggies and fish out.



See life is actually good, I paid 10 off the CC, I *should* be ok money wise this month. It will be tight but possible. I have 70 quid saved for the car tax, am using the 242 pounds I saved as part of the 52 wk challenge towards the car insurance, I have 200 saved for the puppies and 200 towards the car. Also I have my sealed pot money to pay off the extras on the t cc and 14 pounds coming from cash back. I have set aside 600 pounds to pay off the CC at the end of the month - it might not happen but there will be a payment of some sort.


I am very lucky. VERY lucky. Mum tolerated my childish outburst re the bin, the dogs are great. ok the piggies smell bad but the gerbils don't. And I have been invited to go see a musical. Remarkably given my hermit like behaviour of the last two years I still have friends.


Tomorrow is another day right? my body clock is all out of whack, am now hungry!?!


cocoa or hot milk? -> see more choice.


Everything is a CHOICE


or choccie - which actually is also good!


xxxx

Buffythedebtslayer

Probably shouldn't admit this but am watching Top Gear!


So funny. The one across Africa.


Written with many apologies to SA XXXX