Gifts to return/pay for on 'break up'

paulineb_2

If she really wants to return the unused gifts, her choice, but pay for the perfume, no way. Youve opened a gift but youve got to pay for it?

Dear me. He shouldnt ever give anyone gifts again if thats his attitude.

Artytarty

Give it all back , even the opened perfume, she will not enjoy using it now!

marisco_2

OP I think you should be very proud of your daughter. She sounds like a smart young woman who wishes to behave with integrity. She wont be the first or last teenager to get out of her depth in a relationship, with someone controlling and who reading between the lines has a few issues.

There are many women much older than her, who will have taken their time to accept a relationship is not healthy before deciding to end it. This guys reaction and demand to receive payment for gifts given are extremely immature. Probably born partly from no longer having control and wanting to lash out for being seen through and dumped.

Stand back and let your daughter deal with this as she thinks best. Offer support if asked but trust that you have raised her to stand on her own two feet, and respect that she is proving she is more than capable of doing this.

gunsandbanjos

My husband of 10 years demanded back everything he'd ever given me...

meritaten

yes return unopened gifts so he can get refund. the opened and used one cant be returned. but as it was a 'gift' he realy shouldn't expect the return of them. its nice of your daughter to think of returning his 'gifts'.

arbroath_lass

If she does decide to give the gifts back I'd advise her to do it in front of other people. Just in case the ex decides to bad mouth her anyway and tell people she took expensive presents then dumped him.

Homeagain

marisco wrote: »

OP I think you should be very proud of your daughter. She sounds like a smart young woman who wishes to behave with integrity. She wont be the first or last teenager to get out of her depth in a relationship, with someone controlling and who reading between the lines has a few issues.

There are many women much older than her, who will have taken their time to accept a relationship is not healthy before deciding to end it. This guys reaction and demand to receive payment for gifts given are extremely immature. Probably born partly from no longer having control and wanting to lash out for being seen through and dumped.

Stand back and let your daughter deal with this as she thinks best. Offer support if asked but trust that you have raised her to stand on her own two feet, and respect that she is proving she is more than capable of doing this.

Thank you so much, I am blessed and very proud of her. I will leave the decision in her hands and am sure she will do the right thing. I really only posted this issue because I had one thought and she had another! I just hate to see her parted from her hard earned cash but at her age I guess I was a bit more heartless!

Homeagain

arbroath_lass wrote: »

If she does decide to give the gifts back I'd advise her to do it in front of other people. Just in case the ex decides to bad mouth her anyway and tell people she took expensive presents then dumped him.

I think that maybe be his next move (I really hope not) - he needs to be very careful if he decides to take that route

Macca83_2

Homeagain I would suggest letting her decide her next course of action. She's gotten it right so far

FBaby

I too think you should be very proud of your daughter. I would really hope my children acted in the same way. So many would have been happy to get the present and dump him afterwards without a thought. Your daughter is considerate of the situation, good on her.

She should do as she suggested and ignore his attitude. He is clearly upset and needs to let the anger out, hence demanding the money. Once he is over the hurt, hopefully he will appreciate your daughter's gesture.