Good looking women with average looking men - how?

19lottie82

Now I'm not particularly good looking or ugly, but I have never gone for looks in a man...... I find personality much more attractive. I have never found someone instantly attractive, that always develops once I get to know them.

TBH I think a "classically good looking" man would be a turn off!

In general I think women are much more attracted to confidence than looks.

liney

kitrat wrote: »

I'm quite offended by the suggestion I'd just be with an average-looking guy for his money,...

How modest of you! :rotfl:

Confidence is attractive, so if a man is average looking but confident, witty, and can hold an intelligent conversation he will come out with more 'points' than a posing Manbo.

Also, the immortal Streets line: 'You're fit, but my gosh don't you know it.' Also applies to men. Very unattractive.

Finally it depends on what you are classing as beautiful women. If they are a strange orange shade, with hair extensions and fake eyelashes, and nails, then those things can be bought by any woman. Fine feather make fine birds.

Birdie85

There are just fewer 'good looking' men around than there are women because a) women have nicer, more attractive features anyway and b) women have a whole industry aimed at making them look better than they do naturally. Take away the make up, hair extensions and Spanx and you'll find that at the crux of it, these women are generally physically on a par with their partners.

Celebrities/millionaires etc excluded, you'll find that attractive women will go for 'less attractive' men because they're looking at the longer term aspects of their personality. Humour, intelligence, loyalty. Like others have said, looks fade and vanity is an unattractive trait.

My DH is better looking than me, he's much fitter than I could ever hope to be and has a beautifully toned body but we're both aware that as he gets older, the hairline will recede, the wrinkles will set in and the muscles will go soft. I'll still love him though because he's beautiful inside too. He's not an adonis or anything, and I'm not a munter, but younger girls seem to have a thing for him and I've had my fair share of girls 5 years my junior giving me the old look up and down and whispering to their friends 'Why is he with HER?!' Thankfully my DH is oblivious to this and thinks I'm beautiful... he's also aware that I put up with him like no-one else ever could!

Morglin

LiveOnce wrote: »

When you walk around any good crowded area you always see such beautiful/good looking women with average looking guys.

It baffles me not in a shallow way but in some other ways, women make such an effort to look good so I would have thought they picked better in men.

You see women in media portrayed as vying for men like Clooney, Pitt, Cruise, or whoever the flavour of the year is in movies/TV.

I guess it comes down to maybe women look for other things in men than looks. Is this the case?

Or is it the case that the men who have the balls to ask out women tend to get it, over men who are good looking but are not bold?

Money or status (as in politicians , actors, singers or royals).

Lin

VestanPance

Dysnomia wrote: »

Imagine a stunningly beautiful, intelligent young woman. She would like to date a nice, attractive, funny guy. The nice, attractive, funny guys won't ask her out however because they see her as out of their league. Nice guys tending to undervalue themselves because they are so nice etc etc.

This is the self perpetuating myth of the "nice guy". That isn't nice. That's just a severe lack of confidence, which is an instant turn-off be that to males or females.

The most successful people of either sex when it comes to attracting people are those that are confident. Confidence turns heads and makes people interested. Lack of is a turn off and is something the majority don't want in a partner.

Men claiming most women chase money are just not facing up to their own failures. Just like the so called "nice guys" who claim women just want a bad boy. Setting up an excuse to fail. The very definition of confidence issues.

lostinrates

I wasn't attracted to my husband when we first met. I did think he was a really very lovely person though, and agreed to meet him again. He sure as hell convinced me somehow on the next two dates...after the fourth (which admittedly was over a period of time as we went away) I felt convinced he was something very special and felt embarrassed I hadn't seen it at first.

I'm no longer so good looking, but I did get my fair share of attention back then. I often think people must wonder what he is doing with me, Not only is he now by far the better looking of us, he is the kinder, more successful.

pops5588

This is all entirely based on who the OP deems to be attractive! Just because the OP is looking at certain couples and picking out which individual he/she believes to be more attractive doesn't mean the rest of us would come to the same conclusion. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I don't know whether strangers (who quite frankly must have far too much time on their hands to even be bothered by it) look at OH and I and make some kind of ridiculous judgement on who is the most attractive, but I could not care less. I love my OH for a combination of physical and personality attributes. He makes me laugh, likes a light-hearted debate, has broad shoulders and a dimple in one cheek. So what?

I love how people immediately jump to the cliche of women being with older, uglier man with money. Madonna's 25 year old boyfriend anybody?!

SandC

It's often a charisma thing, 'there's just something about him/her' that makes someone attractive. Also, when you get to know someone and fall in love they are physically attractive to you whether or not they are to anyone else.

I really don't think the majority are anything to do with money and those who are in it for that are just shallow. Leave em to it I say, if you need to be with someone and it's not for love then you could be missing out on the right one for you....... not to mention having a fulfilled life as someone without a partner.

Orlando_Virgin

To put it another way, if an average looking man with a lot of money pulls a stunner, who is clearly after the one thing, then if he has any sense, she won't last very long.

I'm not a bad looking lad (my Mum told me so) and NO matter how good looking the girl is you take out, if I don't get a stimulating conversation or something that attracts me in their personality, then it won't go any further than that. Same as if I detected that material wealth was something that mattered.

I would 10 times over take an average looking woman with a cracking personality, than a bimbo who looks good on my arm.

Good looking depends on each individual's definition of "good looking" also.

bugslet

lostinrates wrote: »

I wasn't attracted to my husband when we first met. I did think he was a really very lovely person though, and agreed to meet him again. He sure as hell convinced me somehow on the next two dates...after the fourth (which admittedly was over a period of time as we went away) I felt convinced he was something very special and felt embarrassed I hadn't seen it at first.

I'm no longer so good looking, but I did get my fair share of attention back then. I often think people must wonder what he is doing with me, Not only is he now by far the better looking of us, he is the kinder, more successful.

I suspect there are arguments against that last line lir!;)

Mr Bugs was, not particularly tall and frankly, no oil painting - by his own admission - and he managed to pull me:p, 23 years younger and more solvent than him as he had just been made bankrupt. We met through work, so knew each other before we became an item. Looks don't really matter, it's about how well you click; basically he was more interesting than most men I met, had lived a life and a half by his mid-40s and was never dull with him. Besides getting a stunning woman:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:, he liked my independence and shared values, which we the more important aspects for a successful long-term relationship.