I need help!!! I don't know where to turn

glasgowsaver2011

I agree wholeheartedly with your post.

Standing on your own feet, working, selling her house, and the loan.....

These things could all rescue the situation

BMG

Just to clarify, I have only had to rely on oh when I became disabled. I am unable to go out and work.


The money from parents has already been returned as they asked for it back in the circumstances so that I didn't use it to pay for my debts.


I will get through this with or without friends and family.

thecassman86

You will get through this. You're doing all of the right things.

I know it's hard, but your sitting in your solution. Arrange with solicitors for the sale of the house and the cash from that will get you debt-free and able to draw a line under the whole business. You have a real chance to be very happy - you'll look back at all of this one day from a much better scenario

Good luck!

BMG

As mentioned previously because the mortgage and the property deeds are in joint names, I can not sell the house without OH permission, just as he can not sell it without my permission.

glasgowsaver2011

And a solicitor will find and contact him to force a "divide or sale"

so he buys you out your half or he sells and you go halfs

BMG

I have contacted the energy company today to have the dd lowered. They would only do it by £5 as there is a balance still owing. I am now not having the heating on at all in the house and no lights or tv in the evenings. Just candles. I go to bed when I start getting cold.


Next bill to sort is the house phone and the internet. Parents no longer paying for internet. I think it is a cost that has got to go:(


I am managing to love off things in the freezer and cupboard at the moment. There is enough there to last me at least a month.


Next major task is looking at the debts I have.


Also need to pay for a mot on my car next month.


Does spending never end??? :rotfl:

AMILLIONDOLLARS

At bit harsh from the parents. they could have left you with at least a grand. for emergency purposes. As you state, you will get through.

Husband and NOW the parents, I just don't get it!

AMD

BMG

As I said at the beginning of these posts, my parents don't approve of my marriage, having a mortgage or a credit card. They aren't surprised that he has gone as they have been expecting that for years. They are however, angry with me for taking on a mortgage and credit card(s) after all the things they drilled into me as a teenager. They decided that I couldn't be trusted with the money and asked for it back. I am not surprised this would happen so that is why I didn't use it to spend on the adapting of the house, debts or living.


Posting on here isn't helping my situation at the moment so I will not be around until I can get my head around my marriage breakup and the debt situation. It is all making me very ill. Plus I will be losing the internet again as parents have said that they will no longer pay for it because of my stupidity


I would like to thank you all for your advice and help.

AMILLIONDOLLARS

I read this today:

To be of higher consciousness, you may not deliberately ignore the genuine plight of brothers or sisters, claiming that to let them "stew in their own juice" is the highest gift you can give them. That attitude is righteousness and arrogance at the highest level. It merely allows you to justify your non-involvment.

This should be passed onto the people that surrounds you. Forgiveness towards you, should be your parents highest priority, not I told you so. You have made great progress since you first came on here, don't ever give up.

Wishing you all the best for the future. When the time is right, please let us know how you got on.

AMD

dancingfairy

When you are at the bottom the only way is up. I'm sorry to hear things have turned out as they have. Your first priority is to try and get an income somehow or find somewhere to live for free (perhaps with your parents/friends/other family?). You will probably need to claim some benefits. Is there a group on the internet for people with whatever disability you have? I would assume there is help out there for what forms you need to fill in/how to words things to make sure you get the benefits you are entitled to.
From my position you should be either well enough to work and should get Jobseekers, or if you are ill, then you are ill and should be supported by the state properly.
Perhaps your local CAB may be able to hep or a local disability charity?
In terms of debts such as credit cards, unsecured loans etc then I wouldn't worry too much about these at the moment. They can't have what you haven't got.
Please take care.
df