HELP - how to help my year 12 son study - PLEASE

ValHaller

thorsoak wrote: »

Has no-one suggested that you take away his on-line facilities?

I do realise that these days it is essential to have a computer in order to do homework/studying - but is there not someway that you can deny his access to computer games/social sites?

Unlikely to work. It is an external solution to an internal problem. The issue is in his head. And while you deal with it externally, the inside of his head remains as it was. Thus it stores up a much bigger problem for later when the external solution is removed as it must be - because he will be that much older when he has to confront the issue in his own head.

dragonette

Alikay, start of higher year the boy is prob only 16. In prime grunting phase.

I worked in schools during my degree with pupils taking options n looking ahead, OP feel free to PM me. Was only e4 years ago I stopped doing the wsworl so hopefully could be hellpful still

Jordo

So what if the lad doesn't get 'good' grades? He could go on to study a trade, and become a very happy and successful builder/mechanic/carpenter/plumber you name it - most of those boys and girls who went down the vocational route rather than University are making more money than someone with a 2:2 in Art History...

paulineb_2

Most of the subject choices hes taken look tough, as other people have said the sciences arent easy. I have my O grade chemistry, got a B grade but knew I didnt have what it took to do my Higher, maths isnt easy for a lot of people and I would think physics is the same.

If hes doing Highers in English, Maths, Physics, Chemistry or some of those, Im not surprised hes struggling. I think often that in second year people dont know what they want to do subject wise. I know I made poor choices. My Higher choices in fifth year were English, Maths, French, German and History. I got English, French and German, got my Maths in 6th year and went back a couple of years later and did Economics, Modern Studies and Accounting. As I said above, Economics and Modern Studies were easier than any of the Highers I did in fifth year, apart from English, by a mile.

Id also suggest, get a tutor for the subjects hes really struggling in, it might just be enough to make the difference between a pass and a C or B grade.

georgie262

Hi I'm a Year Manager for Sixth form and have the same problem every yearwith my Y12 students. They are given a little bit more freedom and often can'tcope with it and they need to be micro managed.
1 problem is their age - they can start getting a part time job have a bit ofextra cash and want to go out with their friend
The other major problem is the massive academic step up to Post 16 level. Here,the January exams used to act as massive wakeup call but they have gone now soit's a sink or swim situation (Thanks Gove).
Students in our school who do well tend to have parents who keep in touch -parental engagement makes a massive difference in progress. I give my failingstudents individual learning plans and make them come into the library to studyon their free periods and practically stand over them to make sure they do it.What's his attendance like? This also makes a massive difference. I have beenknown to make sixth form students bring in Letters from their parents after absencesand illnesses (which isn't a school requirement in the sixth form) butsometimes parents are shocked when I call up and tell them about the poorattendance. Keep in touch with the school and keep on him. Plan his free time Isay to my students that if you are doing (as most are) 3/4 subject that’s 30/40hours that you should be putting into your studies. Broken down to 5 hours persubject teaching time and 5 hours per subject as private study/independentlearning. This is equivalent to a full time job. If you plan your study timeproperly you can actually have your evenings and weekends free. There's nomagic answer though usually they have to see the importance for themselves wecan tell them till we're blue in the face but we're 'old' - and I'm only 31!

Alikay

dragonette wrote: »

Alikay, start of higher year the boy is prob only 16. In prime grunting phase.

Ahh, right..... I remember it well: FIFA on the laptop whilst the revision guide lay open beside him...him presumably expecting the knowledge to transfer via osmosis :rotfl:. Being called into school because he was updating the website for his online business during Geography lessons rather than charting longshore drift. Yes, not great if they won't study at 16!

I'm afraid we resorted to watching him closely, keeping in touch with school and the threat that if he didn't get 5 A-C's, he'd be resitting the exams until he did! In the end he passed all 11 mainly at A and B, probably due to it being more hassle to not work, rather than any change in his attitude to study.

DKLS

Would it be worth showing him various job sites so he can see the sort of salaries available in the market for different sectors/roles
and asking him what sort of life he wants to build for himself.

Does he want a Mcjob for life or something else?

duchy

If he is genuinely motivated (which is key) then it is all about study skills techniques. There is no one ideal technique it's down to which suits him and his personality best.

I work better for example to a deadline (even a self imposed one) I get bored with lots of preplanning which some people find essential -some people work better in the morning- others find a long period is better-others need more frequent breaks - I'd suggest you google for some good study guides (student common room is a good place to start looking) and sit down with him and talk about which methods suit him best with them in front of you in black and white. If he's pretty much floated through without needing to put much effort in up to now - he needs to relearn how to learn a bit - and working out what works best for him is the most helpful.

fletch3163

I'm at work but popped in to see. I am OVERWHELMED by the outpouring of help and assistance. Am so grateful to you all. Thank you for taking the time.

I'm going up to Waterstones and WH Smith in a minute to see what I can get. I need to help him. He will regret it. I will regret it if I don't.

I will read all your comments with more attention when I get home but truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.:T

z.n

Just wondering if he has a good memory and has got by so far by using it rather than revision techniques. Both hubby and son 'suffer' with good memories but eventually they cannot hold everything in mind and then they have to ORGANISE THEMSELVES! Ahh the horror of actually having to sort out the paperwork, check it is in order, the pain of bothering to make revision notes! Such a boring chore! It is clearing up the lego/puzzle pieces off the floor and putting them in the right boxes even when they will be coming out again the next day-why bother?- but then everything is a mess and out of control--leads to stress/avoidance/missed homework etc. The approach of 'doing it together' while actually getting them to do it themselves works well- co-operative rather than demanding ifysim.

If your son is capable and really, underneath it all does want to do well then first things first- organise the paperwork. That means ensuring all books are complete, notes and handouts are stuck into books, homework up to date. Sorting it out means looking at it and making sure it is complete. Fill the gaps as needed. Maybe ask teachers for a checklist of topics to be sure. Many problems of avoidance can resolve themselves. He can do this himself and it will be time well spent. Should only take a week or so to complete.

Then take the topic list and highlight problem areas. Encourage him to go over them until confident (bit by bit.) There may be fewer of these than he realises once the notes are in order. Small treats when another is crossed off the list.

Consider actual exam technique- eg make sure he has the exam scheme for all subjects so he knows what is expected to get the marks. Both son and hubby struggled with this because of a silly insistance in doing things a 'more sensible way' rather than meeting the exact exam criteria. Failure to meet the criteria can mean low marks even when they can do the subject.

Ideally then go through everything again to be sure he knows how to handle each type of exam question/topic when under time pressure. They should be doing plenty of this at school.

Only then are you ready to think about the actual revision process eg summary notes, practice questions etc I mean here the work that gets it all set safely in memory. Everyone is different and your son needs to work out what works for him. He needs to know for example, if he crams at the last minute how long will that information remain complete and accessible- for me it is about 18 hours so I had to do more early preparation to ensure the bulk was in long term memory. I had to prepare about four sets of revision notes starting about 8 weeks out, shrinking down each time as parts set into memory , using neumonics (sp?) coloured highlighters, speed writing,bullet point answers to loads of questions, songs etc I then had triggers from the final set which might be something like ' AZDTHP' set to a little tune. Each letter would in turn trigger a sentence that would allow me to access the deeper memory. DH and DS seem ok with the original study notes (once complete and organised) and can focus more on practice questions without so much need for memory crutches.

Don't be afraid to be philosophical about re-takes. Maybe your son is very nervous and thus avoiding rather than being lazy. He might feel better if he knows you will support him come what may. But also be firm (thinking of DH here) and make it clear that some subjects must be passed and thus resat until passed (any hint of having to go through this more than once might get rid of any lingering laziness.)

Test whether he needs you to ban the gaming during the working week- I regularly do this for my Year 11 son and gauge by the level of complaint whether he needs a bit of support to drag himself away/needs a decent excuse so as not to lose face with friends. All the boys at one time or another seem to be banned by their parents so it isn't too big a deal and it gives them a breather to catch up with work. If you end up with a serious fight about it then maybe think again. I wouldn't ban completely though.

Sorry this post is so long- a bit scattergun but hope some of it helps.