Please help. Really struggling.

Bazey

I still think you should switch to Islam OP. I read somewhere that all the women can't get stoned. Now that's progressive!

Angelicdevil

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Most Evangelical churches are protestant .....

Ermmmmm not in the traditional Protestant sense! I was brought up as a Christian in a Protestant church and it is (and was!) nothing like the evangelical churches I have experienced. At church we used to have a sermon, sing some songs and do silent prayer. None of this happy-clappy hallelujah nonsense.

Protestants that I grew up around and that I meet nowadays are much more traditional in their beliefs in that they do not feel the need to announce their religion immediately and push it on others much like the evangelicals I've had the (dis)pleasure of meeting!

Should probably add that I am a very happy atheist! Been there, done that, got the t-shirt and seen the light :rotfl:

Lunar_Eclipse

paulineb wrote: »

You're not supposed to have sex?

Absolutely.

The Bible speaks positively about sex and actively encourages it (amongst married heterosexual couples), but our bodies are deemed to be Holy and Christians are expected to exert self control over their desires of the flesh and daily life in general. Anything less is sinful, but don't forget we are all sinners. Some deal with physical urges better than others.

No-one has to believe the Bible and everyone has free will in choosing whether to become a Christian or not. Having said that, taking the opposite desired behaviour to its extreme, I've never heard anyone believe promiscuity is a good thing to strive for. So why not treat our bodies with the self respect they deserve?

Jim_Jupiter

"With or without religion, good people can behave well and bad people can do evil; but for good people to do evil — that takes religion." - Steven Weinberg.

HeadAboveWater

I remember a song I learned when I was young (I was brought up exact same way as you by sounds of it!)

The church is not a building or a place where people meet
It doesn't have to have a tower or wooden pews or seats
The church is made of people just like you and me
It's another name for God's family

I agree with this....

bugslet wrote: »

You have a a version ( don't mean that rudely) of Christianity that you are happy with, it's a milder version than the Church you are going to has, therefore you just need to find a church where you feel that the beliefs of the rest of the congregation are more in line with yours and you will then feel more accepted and happier.

What is it that makes you a Christian? It's not determined by what church you attend. It's how you live your life.

System

Lunar_Eclipse wrote: »

Absolutely.

The Bible speaks positively about sex and actively encourages it (amongst married heterosexual couples), but our bodies are deemed to be Holy and Christians are expected to exert self control over their desires of the flesh and daily life in general. Anything less is sinful, but don't forget we are all sinners. Some deal with physical urges better than others.

The Bible says:

1 Corinthians 7:3-5

3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

I don't 'do' the depravation bit very well. Oh and my body is definitely mine.

pollypenny

OP, the women you post about don't sound very Christian to me, more like a lot of smug bigots.

Just find another church.

Watto30

Judi wrote: »

The Bible says:
1 Corinthians 7:3-5

3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

think the father of my local church when growing up must have missed this page in the bible, he was married but that soon went sour when his wife found out about all the "bits of skirt" he was chasing! :eek: perhaps she was depriving a bit too often!


joking aside, to the OP I hope you find the right church, group or path for yourself

paulineb_2

Having sex doesn't mean someone is promiscuous. I'm not promiscuous. I'm just not married. There's a massive difference between having sex out of marriage and being promiscuous. A member of my family has been in a long term relationship for 8 years. Not married, live together and neither of them sleep around. I'd defy anyone Christian or not to tell me there's something wrong with their relationship.

And right now I'm single. I can't remember the last time I went for a pint with someone of the opposite sex never mind slept with someone.

But having got to the age of 44 and having never been married, some people might think its wrong if I had sex without being married to the person?

They might, but I don't. As for us all being sinners, that's a belief I don't hold.

I'm not religious. I never have been and never will be.

But I can assure you. I'm far from promiscuous. Some people who are married sleep around and have affairs. I suspect even some married Christians have affairs, as well as people from other religions or people who don't believe.

You'll get people who will sleep with one sexual partner their entire life but not marry them. That's not promiscuous.

Live and let live. That's my view.

paulineb_2

Maybe the original phrase would have been better put as all sexual activity outwith a faithful heterosexual marriage is wrong in the eyes of certain churches.

Marriage is not an automatic sign of fidelity or non promiscuity.