Paid to Breastfeed: would it have encouraged you to do it?

CruisingSaver

I couldn't breastfeed for medical/personal reasons

lilymay1 wrote: »

From what I can gather, the study is being trialled in 2 of the most deprived areas of Sheffield. I say deprived - they are 2 of the areas with the lowest rate of breastfeeding mothers in the country.

£120 (in shopping vouchers) is given if the mother breastfeeds for 6 weeks, the other £80 is if they continue until 6 months. Midwives and health visitors will confirm whether or not the mother is breastfeeding (...'coz that's not open to abuse..!)

The vouchers can be used in high street stores I believe, so can be used to purchase alcohol, cigarettes etc. Entirely up to the mother what she buys with them.

I'm not planning on trying to breastfeed this baby. I guess that makes me a selfish and lazy mother.

No Lilymay that makes you a woman with a mind of your own making a decision for your baby based on your own circumstances

Good luck with your impending arrival.

CS xx

lilymay1

CruisingSaver wrote: »

Good luck with your impending arrival.

CS xx

Thank you. We need it

Bluemeanie_2

I don't/haven't breastfed - no I wouldn't have done it

I couldn't get on with breastfeeding. A £200 voucher would not encourage me to ever do it again. If I ever had another baby he/she would be bottle fed from the start. I decided my daughter was better off bottle fed with a mentally stable Mother than one that was exhausted, unhappy and worn down from being a Martyr.

I'll tell you my story...

My baby daughter is 9 weeks old tomorrow. I feel I had very poor support throughout my whole pregnancy. My Midwives appointments were very short, I was given a couple of leaflets. I had no antenatal classes, so no breastfeeding classes, not even one session.
When my Daughter was born I breastfed her in the Hospital in a very uncomfortable position (I know now). It did nothing but hurt. The Midwife didn't suggest or say anything. I was kept in overnight due to hypertension, they sent a Healthcare assistant to see me, she again just watched.
When a Midwife visited me at home, she showed me a few positions and explained about latching on. That helped a bit with the positioning.
My Daughter absolutely loves her sleep (She's already "going through the night" and has been since 7 weeks). She used to sleep for long stretches in the day, with only a few feeds, then want to feed all night, literally from 10pm until 7am. I never have been able to sleep in the day so after 3 nights of this I was at the point of exhaustion. At one point I could no longer hold her in my arms. My Husband had to take her off me as my arms were trembling and take her downstairs and listen to her cry for food while I passed out. It was horrendous. I felt awful, I was exhausted, I couldn't look after my own baby.
I tried to wake her up to feed her on the advice of the Midwives. She take one suckle, fall sleep for 5 minutes, take one suckle fall asleep etc. So attempting to feed her up in the day didn't work and trust me I tried my hardest! I have since found out all this behaviour is expected at first until established?
I began expressing so she could have a bottle at night to give my poor boobs a rest. My Mum looked after her on the fourth evening/night so I could sleep. She drank all the milk and was crying which obviously woke me up. I just had a breakdown at this point with virtually no sleep for 4 days. I cried and cried, had a breakdown and said I can't do this anymore. It was a Sunday night so 24hr Asda was closed otherwise we would have got formula then.

Alas due to the pressure of being brainwashed into "breast is best" I bought myself the next day a Medela Freestyle double breast pump and just expressed and fed from a bottle. I intended to do this for the six months, rather than have her feed directly from me. I couldn't last with that, it took twice as long, (as you had to feed the baby, then express for 20 minutes) couldn't go out for very long etc, so I packed it in and went to formula.

I gave it a go, I'm glad I tried, but I just couldn't cope with it. I'm really headstrong about everything normally and it broke me. I'm not short of money, so a £200 voucher would not tempt me nor after my experience would it have made me carry on. But I do worry that others who are short of money or are bothered by the feelings of guilt etc getting themselves in a state. I feel I could have easily ended up depressed or the like had I have tried to carry on.
If breastfeeding works for you, or you are able to get passed the first few days, then that is fantastic.
However, I feel women already feel enough guilt about their children (with working, having to use childcare, doing the best for them). I really don't think giving them breast or formula is worth getting so upset about, or beating yourself up about it. If you can;t do it you can't do it. I think the NHS should be ashamed of putting sooo much pressure on women to breastfeed. Encourage it by all means but it isn't the be all and end all. I was formula fed from the start (Mum was ill). I'm 5ft 10" tall, healthy, never had anything up with me. I have reasonable intelligence, a degree etc. I really do not think it is the be all and end all it's made out to me.
I feel had I have made myself carry on and given in to all the pressure and emotional guilt, I would have depression by now. I think that would be worse for my Daughter than giving her formula.

I support a woman's right to choose in all walks of life.

Bluemeanie_2

I don't/haven't breastfed - no I wouldn't have done it

lilymay1 wrote: »

I'm not planning on trying to breastfeed this baby. I guess that makes me a selfish and lazy mother.

If anyone had been completely frank and honest with me about how hard and demanding it is, I wouldn't have even tried. If I have another one, I'll formula feed from the start.

I don't smoke, I rarely drink, I will spend as much time as possible playing with my daughter, reading books, taking her to clubs, holidays etc. Bring her up with manners, encourage her to succeed, be a nice person etc. I keep a clean house, work, look after the pets, etc etc. I'm far from lazy or selfish i think so it is nearly a crime against a woman to consider them that just because they won't/can't breastfeed.

I feel breastfeeding isn't just about feeding the baby. It's a lifestyle choice.

nodiscount

I couldn't breastfeed for medical/personal reasons

poet123 wrote: »

I didn't try. I knew from day 1 of pregnancy that it wasn't for me. Why should I have tried and made myself miserable at what should be a time of great joy?

Quite frankly, I find your judgmental attitude sickening, however I accept you are entitled to your opinion. I was entitled to choose my feeding method.

But how did you know it wasn't for you if you didn't try it? Was there anything that would have changed your mind? Just asking.

Bluemeanie_2

I don't/haven't breastfed - no I wouldn't have done it

nodiscount wrote: »

But how did you know it wasn't for you if you didn't try it? Was there anything that would have changed your mind? Just asking.

Sorry I know you were asking Poet123 a direct question, but with hindsight I think deep down it wasn't for me either. I just gave into the pressure. I shouldn't have done and just told everyone I was FF from the start. I would never have felt comfortable doing it in public. My boobs hurt all the while. It just wasn't the right choice for me.

poet123

I don't/haven't breastfed - no I wouldn't have done it

nodiscount wrote: »

But how did you know it wasn't for you if you didn't try it? Was there anything that would have changed your mind? Just asking.

No, thinking back I actually never even thought about doing it. A couple of friends had done it and they had had problems and eventually changed to the bottle, but I am not sure if that was a factor. For me it is just the first of a series of decisions we make as parents, I chose to bottle feed and had full support, had I chosen to breastfeed I would have had the same family support.

It was my decision and one I have never even thought about much since. It is certainly not something I have ever felt any guilt about.

Nicki

I do/have breastfed - I would have carried on whether the money was offered or not

Air_Cooled_75 wrote: »

Isn't breast milk dairy free?

Breast milk is obviously different to cows milk but it nonetheless has some things in common too. It depends what aspect of the milk the baby is intolerant to, as to whether breast milk can be tolerated.

My BF baby was also dairy intolerant and failed to thrive for the first five months dropping from the 97th centile at birth to the 2nd. When I stopped breast feeding and switched to hypoallergenic prescription formula he went up to the 50th centile within a few weeks. So for him breast milk was not a good choice.

poet123

I don't/haven't breastfed - no I wouldn't have done it

nodiscount wrote: »

I must admit I felt very guilty when I failed to carry on bf after 3 weeks but at least I tried. It is not mothers like me who should feel guilty it's the ones can haven't even bothered trying who should feel guilt.

When I answered your direct question I wasn't aware you had written this. Why should I feel guilt? What gives you the right to judge my choice of feeding method?

justjohn

Is this also too try too stop people selling the milk tokens or does that not go on now?(only just caught it on the news)