homework help

sooty&sweep

Hi
By the sound of it you have a child that obviously works hard both at home and school to be so good at his maths and literacy in terms of spelling and reading and writing (?)

Id check that there are no issues in terms of autism aspergers etc and if that comes back ok then Id relax on it and accept that he doesnt like this type of stuff and it will sort itself with time. He sounds like he is trying so hard with everything else you can only expect so much from a 6 year old.
Personally I would have a real issue with a school that keeps 6 year old children in at break time over this type of thing and I think it would do more harm than good. A child needs that play time as they need that opportunity to develop their social skills.

Jen

Toto

Poor thing, I had similar issues with my son when he was around the same age, only his nemesis was maths. He struggled so much with it, he absolutely hated doing anything maths related and we had months on end of tears over homework. One day I will never forget, I asked him to get his folder out and inside was his maths homework, number bonds. He looked at me, went a shade of white and vomited on the living room floor. I cried with him and promised him that his stress ended that day.

From then on I made it very clear that he was not to be punished for not completing his maths homework, no lunchtime sessions or anything of the sort. I actually requested that all maths should be done in school with support until he is feeling more confident, we could do maths based fun activities at home without the homework stigma. It all did help.

Now my little one is in school and I love the attitude to homework at this school, she has daily reading and twice a week a little maths based activity which is for her to do for fun, no need to hand in. The ethos in this school is that sheet homework is pointless because you either make it so easy that the child can do it without support (so what's the point) or you have to send homework which will challenge them the problem is that you don't know that the child has someone at home who can help for whatever reason and that causes inequality in the class. I like it, it's refreshing and makes learning fun.

sooty&sweep

Hi
By the sound of it you have a child that obviously works hard both at home and school to be so good at his maths and literacy in terms of spelling and reading and writing (?)

Id check that there are no issues in terms of autism aspergers etc and if that comes back ok then Id relax on it and accept that he doesnt like this type of stuff and it will sort itself with time. He sounds like he is trying so hard with everything else you can only expect so much from a 6 year old.
Personally I would have a real issue with a school that keeps 6 year old children in at break time over this type of thing and I think it would do more harm than good. A child needs that play time as they need that opportunity to develop their social skills.

Jen

double_mummy

Janepig wrote: »

I can't believe the amount of homework that the school put on the OP's son. And Spanish? At 6? they start spanish in nursery so my 4 year old is doing it too they are also both learning hebrew at home (his dad is israeli) he is excellent at languages and picks them up really fast Although I suppose it's no worse than the fact that my two go to a Welsh school. But still. DS has just gone into year 3 (he's 7) and we were told there's no regular homework until at least after the first half term, and then it's not much. He brought a homework sheet home on Monday which was 8 letters of the alphabet in boxes and he had to write a word beginning with that letter and draw a picture. It's only in year 3 that they start doing English, he's been taught solely in welsh up to now.

DD's in year 6 and she gets homework two or three times a week now but that's no more than about 10-15 minutes work at most, we do it as soon as she gets in from school. They do have to stay in at playtime if it's not completed at home, but only until they've completed it. One of DD's friends actually forged a note for her in breakfast club last term as if it was from me explaining why she hadn't done her homework (she'd left it at home). I was mortified.

As for the empathy thing, there's no less empathetic child than DD, but the word Autistic wouldn't even cross my mind for her. I find it strange that because a six year old boy doesn't like doing his literacy homework (like most six year old boys I would guess) then there must be something medically wrong with him.

And as for not reading with expression? He's 6 fgs. I wouldn't expect most six year olds to be able to read with expression. Let him be a child.

Jx

he has just began year 2 and will be 7 next month. i think it is because he is so far ahead with everything else he hit all his developmental milestones very early was potty trained early and he has always been so far ahead that he may just be normal at something but to us it is very weird iyswim i think the main problem is just the types of things he has problems with and the more im reading about (esp aspergers) the more and more it sounds like him so i would rather get it checked out now and just be sure he is currently seeing the doctor quite often for something completely unrelated that they are investigating so will just bring it up next time we go in

double_mummy

Janepig wrote: »

THIS!!!

Not to mention that my two have lives outside of school, and lots of homework would certainly be difficult for them to fit in alongside all the other stuff, sports clubs, Beavers, parties, and to be honest, sitting and vegging out in front of the tv or playing outside. When does the OP's son have time to be six, when all he's doing is homework, spellings, times tables and reading books every single day, as well as doing it in school.

Jx

he doesnt want to do any of those thing we have tried to get him involved in all sorts of bits and bobs and he just doesnt get involved or sits at the side doing nothing he doesnt go to parties because he doesnt really get invited to any apart from family ones. he only likes tv if it is a series or a movie that he can follow and he occasionally likes to play outside but only when there are people that he can play around but not with

his reading is his special time with me i put little one to bed and we snuggle up in his bed and read we have a good catch up of the day and all that sort of stuff but its all very factual

his times tables take about 5 minutes as he knows all of them and his recall is excellent he can work out simple money when we are shopping (if i buy 3 of these how much will that cost etc) so its not always hardcore times tables but i try to relate it back in every day life

if he has nothing to do and can choose anything he will either play on the kinnect (something like the kinnect adventures) or he will sit and read or build things with lego

jellyhead

Both of my boys have 'autistic traits' ... ask school what they think. Neither of mine got diagnosed with aspergers but there were enough signs for it to be worth investigating. My eldest went through a different system (he was referred at age 2) but my youngest who is now in year 4 was referred by the school at the end of year 1.

The teacher and TA had a chat with the SENCO and between them they decided to get the school nurse in for a meeting with me. The school nurse decided whether or not to refer to the child development centre, and upon getting her letter they decided whether or not to assess him (she said, I don't know if the process is still the same now?).

The paediatrician gave us the CAST questionnaire (childhood aspergers syndrome test?) but he didn't tick enough boxes. I never thought my youngest had aspergers anyhow, his 'quirkiness' wasn't as severe as his brother's, and although I am convinced (and so is school) that he is dyspraxic he didn't tick quite enough boxes for that either.

The consultant said that some people are just 'like that' but it doesn't hinder their life much. For my boys I'd say that it probably only hindered them because they were the youngest in the class. My eldest had his one to one assistant during key stage 1, but youngest has struggled with his emotions during literacy lessons.

Talk to the teacher and see what he is like in class. My youngest was behaving just the same in class, whereas many of the parents talking about homework tantrums found that their child behaved well and got on with the same sort of work in class. Mine appeared not to be able to drum up any imagination or empathy though, and he just didn't know what they were asking him to do. He cried a lot in lessons.

The teacher adjusted her expectations of him in literacy lessons, but year 3 got tougher (lots of story writing) and he had a teacher who kept them in at playtime to finish classwork, let alone homework. I asked could he please not be kept in every playtime, and could he bring the work home instead. Oh my life, that ruined many weekends!

He is in year 4 now and has only had one meltdown, and that was about describing a character's feelings. He has got better control of his emotions now, and is learning how to control his panic so that he doesn't get to the stage where he is being ridiculous. He reads a lot of fiction books now in addition to his non-fiction, and I suspect that most of the stories he produces in school are recycled plots from stories he has heard before. School said that was okay.

Sorry this is such a ramble, but I just wanted to give you a perspective from a mum whose child was not diagnosed with aspergers, and who improved with age and got less 'stressy'. He still lays the odd 'stress egg' (he flaps like a chicken) but he is getting so much better. Confidence and control of his emotions are making a big difference as he gets older.

He now knows that as long as he makes a stab, it will be okay. It's when he sits and produces no work at all that he gets into trouble, or if like your son he trashed his book he'd be punished for that too, but they don't punish for getting things wrong or not having enough ideas.

Good luck, I hope he gets happier and more confident.

Janepig

jellyhead wrote: »

He is in year 4 now and has only had one meltdown, and that was about describing a character's feelings. He has got better control of his emotions now, and is learning how to control his panic so that he doesn't get to the stage where he is being ridiculous. He reads a lot of fiction books now in addition to his non-fiction, and I suspect that most of the stories he produces in school are recycled plots from stories he has heard before. School said that was okay.

I wonder if a liking of non-fiction is a slight boyish thing though? DS loves fact books, especially about things like animals and space and cars. I don't think DD has read a non-fiction book in her life (unless you count a JLS annual as non fiction :D)

I was totally unimaginative in primary school. I know most of my artwork and stories was regurgitated stuff I'd seen others do. I remember in infant school (one of my few memories from there) when I was about five we were given various wooden shapes to draw around (a big piece of paper was up on an easel) and we had to do "my shape picture". So I just drew around the shapes on the paper in various places in a sort of abstract fashion and I had a hell of a row because I was apparently supposed to make a descernable (sp) picture out of them. I remember one of my classmates did a picture of a person out of the shapes. It just didn't occur to me. But it stayed in my memory!!

Jx

marisco_2

gingin wrote: »

If a child is already stressed about something adding pressure is only going to make things worse.

This statement is spot on. Above all else my colleagues and I aim for each child in our class to come in and feel safe, secure, relaxed and happy. No child will be in the right frame of mind to concentrate, focus and learn if they are in a state of stress and anxiety. They will also find it next to impossible to interact and work cooperatively with their peers.

All children develop at their own pace. It takes a lot of time and a fair bit of personal experience to recognise and understand peoples emotions. Not something many kids approaching seven years old could claim to have a real handle of. Teaching of this life skill can easily be built into p.s.h.e lessons or a small social skills group. Does your sons school run any after school clubs? I am thinking drama could be great for him, helping him to socialise and interact in a relaxed environment and an ideal chance to be imaginative and expressive. He may also pick up all kind of cues from those he is with.

Your son is doing very well to be off the reading schemes and a free reader. The fact that he cant predict what may happen in stories, or pick up on a characters feelings would make me question how thoroughly past teachers have tested how secure his comprehension of text is. This is a fundamental part of learning as children work through the levelled books.

Loz01

My nephew is 6 and he has 2 lots of homework a week - maths one week and literacy the next and he has to learn spellings. The literacy is a learning log and is something imaginative normally, this week is it write about what toys your mum/dad and grandparents played with. Maths is obviously maths. Spellings are 10 words. If he doesn't do his homework he stays in I think at break to complete it, unless there's a note from home.

Spendless

Janepig wrote: »

I wonder if a liking of non-fiction is a slight boyish thing though? DS loves fact books, especially about things like animals and space and cars. I don't think DD has read a non-fiction book in her life (unless you count a JLS annual as non fiction :D)Jx

I was told it was. DS left reception unable to read his key words and went into a 'catch up' group during yr1. I tried with all sorts of reading books but eventually 'hit' on that he was more interested in reading non-fiction. When I mentioned it to the school staff they said this was common in boys.

My son at 13 has similar traits to the OP's son, very good at numeracy (though he dislikes it) but handwriting that's a scrawl and struggles with descriptive writing and he is not autistic.