School problem

dancingfairy

Are the parents normally o.k. to deal with, do you know?
A few options off the top of my head:
1)ask the school to investigate said incident and for your GD to appologise if she did acidentally scratch the other girl. There may actually be more to this story - ie the other girl could well have started something.
2) ask the school for a meeting so you can get things off your chest and sort things out with the other family.
3) have a word with the other family yourself (if they are approachable) to 'clear the air' and to 'make sure things aren't blown out of proportion'. Hopefully if they are nice, decent people they will be embarrassed and you can all move on from this.

Don't know if any of these suggestions are helpful to you, but a few suggestions anyway.
df

bellkat

Thanks Lannieduck and Mrs Atobe

All the deputy head would say was that they would keep an eye on the children, but they were not going to speak to the parents.

So now we will feel on edge every time we are in the playground, as we did today really.

My DD's first instinct yesterday was to confront him, but she was so upset at the time it really wouldn't have been a good idea. He's not really the sort of person you would want to confront anyway.

We were just really shocked that the school refused to help us deal with it, as like you say we would not class it as a 'little incident'

Mojisola

bellkat wrote: »

All the deputy head would say was that they would keep an eye on the children, but they were not going to speak to the parents.

So now we will feel on edge every time we are in the playground, as we did today really.

My DD's first instinct yesterday was to confront him, but she was so upset at the time it really wouldn't have been a good idea. He's not really the sort of person you would want to confront anyway.

We were just really shocked that the school refused to help us deal with it, as like you say we would not class it as a 'little incident'

You have your answer as to why the school don't want to speak to the parents!

tom9980

bellkat wrote: »

I do not think schools should tolerate parents using bad language in the playground in front of children. This happened in GD's nursery and a number of parents complained and the parent in question was spoken to!

It should not be tolerated you are right. Without more evidence or witnesses there is nothing the school can do about it. Even then telling someone who doesn't care will achieve nothing, other than make them angry and more likely to cause you problems.

bellkat wrote: »

Thanks Lannieduck and Mrs Atobe

All the deputy head would say was that they would keep an eye on the children, but they were not going to speak to the parents.

So now we will feel on edge every time we are in the playground, as we did today really.

My DD's first instinct yesterday was to confront him, but she was so upset at the time it really wouldn't have been a good idea. He's not really the sort of person you would want to confront anyway.

We were just really shocked that the school refused to help us deal with it, as like you say we would not class it as a 'little incident'

What can the school do? they have no power over this man, at most they can gather witness statements and tell him not to swear. They wont be able to exclude the child she has a right to education. They cannot stop him picking up his child from school.

What would you like them to do?

cr1mson

There seems to be way too much involvement from other Mums. I wonder if they have an agenda here.

Surely if they were that concerned they should have reported it themselves or not pointed out your GD could have easy lied and said no don't think she is here.

C

bellkat

What can the school do? they have no power over this man, at most they can gather witness statements and tell him not to swear. They wont be able to exclude the child she has a right to education. They cannot stop him picking up his child from school.

What would you like them to do?[/QUOTE]

We would like the school to tell him what his daughter said to my GD, and to ask him his reasons for asking another parent to pick my GD out in the school line. Also I would like them to let him know that they are aware he called her a 'little bi**h to another parent.

We think this is aggressive behaviour, and we are mostly really worried that he may approach my GD. We always stay and watch her go into school and make sure that we are there before she comes out, but he could still go up to her in the line if he was feeling that angry.

Thumper7

Can I ask, what did he do once he knew who your GD was and called her a little !!!!!.

I think you should ask the other mum in what context the comment was made.

GwylimT

Your daughter is an adult, she is more than capable of sorting out her own problems, it is not a schools responsibility to tell an adult that they are aware that he/she has used a swear word.

What he does and what he says to other adults is none of the schools business, if a school also told every parent every 'threat' their child made they would never leave the building. Try going to a lesson, you wont find a single child who isn't threatening ridiculous things like "I'll break your stuff" or "I'll get my dad on you".

meritaten

GwylimT wrote: »

Your daughter is an adult, she is more than capable of sorting out her own problems, it is not a schools responsibility to tell an adult that they are aware that he/she has used a swear word.

What he does and what he says to other adults is none of the schools business, if a school also told every parent every 'threat' their child made they would never leave the building. Try going to a lesson, you wont find a single child who isn't threatening ridiculous things like "I'll break your stuff" or "I'll get my dad on you".

True - but then, you don't usually get the dad approaching other parents to ask them to point out the child responsible for 'scratching my childs neck' and calling her a 'little !!!!!', do you?
its a difficult one - if this happened on the school premises and the person who pointed out your grandchild was willing to actually speak to the school - then it wouldn't be 'hearsay' and they would have to act on it.
if the school would then not act on it - I would write to the governors.

I can understand why you are worried - Where I live I would be worried too! these sorts of things can escalate when parents are shall we say 'unbalanced'?

Janepig

If a child I didn't know had scratched or done something similar to one of my children to the point that they were upset about it, I would be asking another parent who might know them to point that child out to me so I knew who they were. I don't see why that would be seen as being sinister necessarily.

I'm also of the opinion that I don't really see what the school can or should do. I wouldn't particularly be pleased if someone from DD/DS's school hauled me up for something I may or may not have said on some third hand evidence.

DD has fallen out with friends over the years, the biatchyness of girls is something to behold, even from a very young age. The school might as well have had a revolving door if I'd have reacted every time DD got upset. Then five minutes later she's best pals with the kid she was crying over previously. DS was in front of the headmaster yesterday for fighting (as quite afew seven year old boys are want to do ) - he explained the incident to me and also another parent corroborated the story from their DS, but the school hadn't seen fit to mention it to me (another parent took it upon herself to ring the parent that spoke to me about it) and I trust their judgement.

Jx