School problem

tea_lover

tom9980 wrote: »

She is 7. This kind of thing has happened in playgrounds since the dawn of time.

Between children, yes. But most schools I know of would take a dim view of a grown man threatening to punch a 7 year old girl in the face and calling her a little b*tch.

tom9980

tea_lover wrote: »

Between children, yes. But most schools I know of would take a dim view of a grown man threatening to punch a 7 year old girl in the face and calling her a little b*tch.

1. He did not threaten to punch a child. His daughter suggested he would.
2. The school at present have no evidence he even called her a !!!!!.

If a member of staff had heard or been aware of such things they would be dealt with differently but that has not happened.

Everyone is making too many assumptions and already Chinese whispers are occurring and we are only at post 13.

hazyjo

If he'd said it to her face, fair enough. NOBODY knows the tone in which it was said. I can imagine any adult jokingly saying something like that. People are taking it SO literally! I can imagine my sister saying to the kids 'shall we go donk them on the head' (or, yes, even 'give her a punch in the face' to lighten the situation, or laughing... you just don't know the context it was said in. Might not be nice to some people, but it's VERY unlikely to have been said in a literal manner! Can nobody hear that as a jokey comment some parent or grandparent or whoever might say if there child or whoever was standing there in tears saying so-and-so was mean to me today, or so-and-so scratched me?' Did they go charging up the school to complain about the scratch - if indeed there was one?!

As for the b**** comment, again, what some people say are different to others. I've heard my 60-odd year old mum moan about the girls when they were little saying "L was being a right little b**** today'! It's not done in a nasty way, some people just use that term. It does not mean my soft mum would stand there and yell at my niece calling her a B**** to her face. She wouldn't dream of it in that context.

I can't see any facts here. It's hearsay at best. No school is going to reprimand a grown man on things he's said unless he's actually gone charging up to the child calling her all the names under the sun and/or threatening to punch her in the face.

Can't believe it's all getting this far tbh... I'd just leave it!

Jx

cheepskate_2

I wonder if it was one of the really nice kids, that was liked by the parents if this incident would have been reported to you.

Parents always like to b^tch about the " not so good kid" .

Parents b^tching causes more problems than the kids do.


Edit......Parent may have said "puch your GD" to his daughter...but you do not have any context of how it was said....If your interpretation is the father is this angry, maybe there is things your GD is doing to the other girl that you do not hear about, re: the above bit.

I hate when parents come on these forums , set the scene by going on about how teachers etc all love their child .........and how x child is disliked by everyone, then go on to tell their tale.

LannieDuck

I would ask the other Mum to go with you to report it. Hopefully they're investigating anyway, but at least they can't dismiss it as 'hearsay' then.

Mojisola

At the very least, the school should be making sure that your daughter is kept safe while in the school and stays with a responsible adult until whoever is collecting her arrives rather than running out into the playground with all the other children.

It's difficult for the school to tackle the father but the Head should be proactive regarding the other child's behaviour. As there are a group of parents with concerns, you (as a group) could ask for a meeting with the Head and Chair of Governors.

fabforty

bellkat wrote: »

My grandaughter is in year 3, age 7. Shes never had any problems at school and always had lovely reports from her teachers, both for her work and behaviour.

There is girl in her class who has 'challenging behaviour'. A number of parents have spoken about it and on occasions had to go into school to sort out issues.
My GD has mentioned minor incidents occasionally, but also sometimes plays with her, so no major incidents until now.

A week or so ago GD told her mum that this girl had said to her 'my dad is going to punch you in the face'. We sort of brushed it off thinking kids say daft things and GD didn't really seem that bothered by it.

Yesterday I did the school run and one of the mums in GD's class came over and told me that this girls dad had been asking her who my GD was, they were lining up to go in school at the time.
He then said about an incident between the girls, and said that my GD had scratched his daughters neck.
When this other mum told him which one my GD was he then went on to say 'the little b**ch'.
We are obviously quite distressed about this ,so her mum rang the school and spoke to the teacher and the deputy head. They have said they are not prepared to speak to the parents of this girl as it's classed as hearsay as we did not hear him say these things ourselves.
They seem to be disregarding the comments made by this girl to GD
The deputy head is going to report to the head teacher today, so we're waiting to see if we hear from him.

I would welcome any thoughts on this, are we over reacting as they seem to think? Should they be prepared to speak to him.
We are going to be on pins now every time we go to school and certainly don't want any big playground confrontations.

Thanks for reading, sorry it's so long.

And did your grand daughter actually do this (scratch the other little girl)?

If so, that probably explains his language. A little boy pushed DS over in the park. Despite the fact that he was only about 5 years old (DS was 2.5 at the time), I used some extremely colourful language when I talked about him later and if DS could have repeated everything I said, I bet his parents would have been concerned as well . I suspect many parents (if we are all being honest) have said the same, if not worse about a child who has upset or injured their own.

de_g.

Look, the OP has a legitimate worry. While we don't know the full context, I do know that the school should have policies which prevent these issues coming to the fore. If the OP's GD did scratch the other child then that should have been dealt with properly in school, as should the other child making threats.

If the school was doing what it should, there should be no reason for parents to feel the need to get involved. Now they are, whoever was originally at fault this issue risks escalating into something which puts both children at risk, and therefore the school should be taking action to bring the dispute to an amicable conclusion.

hazyjo

Well, I disagree - apart from the scratching incident. I don't see why the school should be involved when it's only hearsay. If the parent did say something about punching the girl in the face, unless they want to involve the police (again, I can't see how or why), what the hell has that got to do with the school?!

In fact, on re-reading the OP's first para, the girl said 'my dad is going to punch you in the face'. That does NOT imply he said that. The girl said that. The dad would probably be horrified.

The girl probably is a nightmare, she probably did say her dad would punch her in the face, she also probably did say the GD scratched her. The issue here is with the girl - NOT with her parent! So what if he called her a b****? He probably thought she was after what the daughter told him.

Honestly, this is the way rumours start...!

Jx

itsanne

bellkat wrote: »

Yesterday I did the school run and one of the mums in GD's class came over and told me that this girls dad had been asking her who my GD was, they were lining up to go in school at the time.
He then said about an incident between the girls, and said that my GD had scratched his daughters neck.
When this other mum told him which one my GD was he then went on to say 'the little b**ch'.

I wouldn't be too happy about either of the bits in bold.